Today we will talk about the topic of "whether 3 years old can see the old".
In today's society, there are many opinions about the emotional experience of children under three years old, some people think that they don't remember anything before the age of three, so companionship is dispensable, while some people insist that children have only one childhood, and now they are only children, and they should not be absent from this unique time. So how exactly did emotions before the age of three form? What role should parents play in this emotion?
Everyone's emotions before the age of three are very different, which stems from their feelings about the memory before the age of three, just as some people have almost no memory before the age of three, while some people can talk about things before the age of 3, because of the difference in memory between individuals or because of the impact of events on individuals, so what events can be stored from the age of 3 to adulthood?
Before I was 3 years old, there were two things that I still remember vividly, I remember that I was playing a game of hide-and-seek with my friends, when I was hiding, I accidentally touched the tail of the vehicle next to me, my eyes and eyebrow bones were broken, and I also stitched several stitches for this, and I especially remember the way my father ran my back that evening, like an Ultraman who saved the world, in addition, there were scars on my body that could be seen in the mirror every time.
Another thing is a little ridiculous to say, when I was a child, I was very resistant to the camera, and the three-year-old little head had a ridiculous understanding, thinking that once people take pictures, they will be adsorbed into the photos, and the camera has the magic of people will not be there, which directly leads to my three-year-old almost no photos of myself.
These two events can be said to be "painful" and "afraid" memories, which at least shows that the size of the impact of an event on the individual directly affects the quality of memory.
The bigger topic of memory differences affects our memory before the age of three.
This has to mention the "hippocampus", an important part of the brain, "hippocampus" mainly serves as a storage function for long-term memory, but the development of each individual is completely different, which will lead to differences in development, some people may develop more mature, then his memory before the age of three is more maintained, and vice versa.
But there is a study that shows that people's memories before the age of three during deep sleep are complete and clear, which also shows that adults are selective in the processing and sorting of memories, when you continue to store more information in growth, the brain is also constantly forgetting some events, even if you are three years old when the "hippocampus" is fully developed, you can not clearly recall the memories before the age of three in adulthood.
So what exactly are the events that can be stored from the age of 3 all the way to adulthood? Memory is the activity of the brain, divided into memory, retention, reproduction, memory is to store information in the brain through the sensory organs, keep is the memory of short-term, long-term, instantaneous storage of time, reproduction is the reproduction of memory, so, a memory reproduction is the need to remember as the basis, maintain as a bridge, if only the memory is not maintained, it is also impossible to reproduce, just as I remember the scene where my father carried me to the hospital, because the memory has a retention function, but also from the side, The basis of memorization is complete and story-like.
Just like letting you recall what dinner you had on Tuesday the week before, who you met on the road, these insignificant and memory-based events will not be maintained in the brain, let alone reproduced, but if you are asked how much your credit card bill was last month, how much salary was paid, these problems can be better maintained, it can be seen that memory has always been an important part of the dependence on the perceptual organ, your feelings can come from taste, hearing, skin, many aspects, It is precisely because the fusion of various senses stimulates the brain's information composition, and then further recognizes, maintains, and even reproduces memories.
In summary, for the memory before the age of three, we selectively remember under the action of the perceptual organ, and with our adult life, the quality and quantity of memory are also changing.
So what role should parents play in this emotion?
Before the age of 3 is the child's emotional dependence of the critical period, I believe that there are many small partners from childhood is growing up with grandparents, for the role of mom and dad is vague and undefined, long-term role vacancies are extremely cruel to children, they will not understand life, pressure, mortgage, will only cry when you reach out to hug. This kind of strangeness is difficult to re-establish once cultivated, and when you grow up, you will only say complaints such as "from childhood, leave me alone", and I believe that there will never be less in this generation.
If parents are not involved in the child's life, then the child will not have a memory for the parents, because there is no emotional participation at all, and there is no sensory organ to provide information to the brain, so there will be no memory feedback in adulthood, and when you are old, there will be very few topics to discuss together. I believe that this lack will eventually become a regret, may not be able to experience it for you now, you may wish to ask the old people around you, their guilt, maybe it is what you can do now but give up.
It is said that when three years old, a child who lacks the love of his parents lacks satisfaction, compassion and pride. And this bottom of the heart perception will also form an inferiority, selfish, cowardly memory, this memory and then fused with each other, will have a profound impact on the formation of the child's personality, in general, the child's behavior cognition is established in imitation and follow-up, the surrounding relatives are the most influential factors, when a small habit and idea germinates in his body, it will accompany later life, when we grow up to realize this, but need to pay a lot to re-sort these memories feedback to bring to the inner imbalance.
Therefore, as a parent, we should not only focus on creating a warm harbor for our children, but should pay more attention to laying a psychological and emotional road, so that the child's memory before the age of three is emotionally linked, and this emotion is far-reaching and meaningful.
The recent death of photographer Lu Dawson is enough to make us start thinking again, a left-behind child born in the countryside and bullied, the choice made under insufficient emotional support, if there is no self at all, in the mouth of others and families, it will only be "very sensible, not to cause trouble, good children" But this is not all of themselves, perhaps from the moment they stay behind, they have been doomed to everything now, there is no window of spiritual output, no ability to complain about pampering, no wanton and willful thoughts, no carrier of emotional sustenance, All these wounds, even if they become tall in growth, even if they become excellent in their careers, even if they become smooth in society, cannot make up for the "dissatisfaction" of the soul, which is not filled now and in the future, but the past that has left us!!!
Therefore, the emotions before the age of three are directly related to a person's life, as a parent in the new era should know how to weigh the pros and cons, can give the corresponding advice and help in each critical period of the child, it is this little bit of emotional integration and thinking communication, accumulating a complete personality and affirmation of self-worth, I hope that every child can look back at the past, no hesitation, no harm, only the warm smile of the family.
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