Read The Man Forgotten by Time: The Castle, Plunged into the Abyss of Self (I)

The man who has been forgotten by time

[English] Rick Jakowski

The Forgotten Man of Time is the first novel by Rick Jekowski, a British writer, scholar and one of the world's most prominent publishers.

The novel tells in the first person that after losing his wife, the protagonist fell into the abyss of the self, and this "self" cut off all contact with the world, and there is no passage of time, in this world, everything is dusty, only the protagonist has a lonely and xenophobic consciousness, the wife is his communicator with the world, losing this communicator, he is left in the darkness of time.

The author uses the chronological order of memories to expose the reasons why the protagonist has become a social resister and a world-weary person, the wife suffers from cancer and suffers, and gives his wife a ride by himself, and since then, silence, sorrow and resistance have swept in, in the dark place of time, in the abyss of self-denial, the last bright exit is courage, mutual understanding and inclusive love.

First, the castle, plunged into the abyss of the self

I went to Cooper, a quiet and unpaid worker, through the Internet, and gave him five tasks: removing the copper mailbox, reinstalling a doorbell that would ring no matter how you pressed it, installing a cat's eye with a visibility angle of two hundred degrees, replacing the lock and key, and removing the brass ring used to knock on the door without a trace.

To avoid trouble, I disguised myself as deaf and carefully watched the taciturn worker Cooper go to work.

Cooper was not a curious person, and he was very punctual at work, and even exposed me that my deafness was pretended, but what did it matter, the worker's use of me was only to complete those five tasks, and when he was done, he should retire from my world.

I want this door to work, locking everything on the outside, and inside the door is only myself. Then I leave myself only a window into the world, or a small hole in the outside world.

Yes, that's the real reason I actually hired Cooper for five missions – locking everything out and leaving myself alone.

The next day I settled the letter in my mailbox and wrote to my good friend George, a student, informing him that he had reset the mailbox and not bothering again, expressing his desire to cut off all contact with the outside world.

Immediately after, I canceled my landline, changed my mobile phone number, ordered food... Everything was ready and I never had to go out again.

"If I have any serious illness or heart disease, I will refuse to call the emergency and I will die." If the house catches fire, I will be reduced to ashes with it..." The good thing about isolation is that there will never be strangers, or anyone to disturb me, this is my castle."

Whoever presses the doorbell, the doorbell will only ring once, and I should not be able to hear it, allowing myself to stay in the dark, thinking about the difference between going to heaven and going to hell after death, and suddenly thinking of my daughter Ruth's wedding. I used to try to stop her before the wedding, but people are often like this, obviously very worried, but still choose to get married, then I don't care.

There's a lot more to do about Ruth, how cute she was when she was a kid, the long-eared dog in the neighborhood, the loud noises, and some of the little episodes that happened when I was a teacher at school...

I think about life, think about the darkness, is darkness blind and can't see the light? Is darkness the despair that people with claustrophobia feel in a tunnel? Is darkness swallowed up alive in a coffin in a novel? No, no, no one understands.

But when I wasn't desperate, I started bored.

People are really contradictory, and the world is really unfair.

I lived in the life of Ruth and my wife, Susie, but I was living alone, and getting lonely.

I fired the nanny that Ruth had hired for me, and although she did a very good job, I didn't need it, maybe I needed a little, but I didn't need it. Anyway I fired her.

This country too, is not at all mature.

George even sent me a not-so-friendly letter, he saw through my trick of pretending not to receive the letter, I was isolated from the world for a few months, although he cared about me, but I was still angry, I would not tolerate George's attention to me, no one can, I even threw away the letter that Ruth sent me, I angrily raised my pen and wrote back to George, asking him not to write to me again.

It's annoying, the neighbor's dog is so noisy, I'm going to punish it by buying the hottest hot sauce in the world...

My castle, my castle, only I can peep out, no one is allowed to come and disturb me, this is my castle, my world alone, I will be lonely to death, and I have nothing to do with anyone.