Vijun, all-media contributing author of the article/family magazine
In the past two days, a chat record suddenly went viral on the Internet.
A female international student posted her father's photo, name, position, and contact information on the Internet.
In her mouth, the father is a mad pig, a disgusting thing, a vile villain...
She sent out the chat records with her father and the video of the quarrel, so that netizens could storm her father together.
What exactly did the father do to make his own daughter "intolerable" to go online to denounce it?
However, if you look closely at the chat records, you can't see any deep hatred, but instead write the words "white-eyed wolf" on the screen!
01
According to the woman's online post, she is 23 years old and studying abroad at the University of Salamanca in Spain.
Father, who is 51 years old this year.
The daughter always felt that her father gave her too little money to meet her study abroad life in Spain.
The dialogue is as follows, you can look at it together:
The father asked what was going on with the expenses on his credit card and asked his daughter to try not to overdraft, saying that taking a taxi and buying groceries were emergencies.
After careful communication, the father helplessly said: You spend more than 10,000 yuan per month, and your father's salary is very stressful.
The daughter was not at all moved, and even began to get angry: "I am unbalanced nutrition!" It's not easy for me! ”
What is even more infuriating is that it is not enough to take what is taken in the dialogue, and it is not enough to sneer at the father.
Hanging up the chat history on the Internet, she also had to humiliate the father who had been paid out of his salary with the most ugly and rude words below.
In retaliation, she even filmed a video of herself insulting her father in person and posted it online.
At first glance, you might think this is a 15- or 16-year-old rebellious child, but she's actually 23 years old!
At this age, even if the rich second generation continues to study, most of them will choose to go to school while working.
But she nibbled out the "sense of justice", which really responded to the Cantonese people's sentence: Raw char siu is better than raw you!
Let's take a look at studying in Spain, living expenses of 10,000 yuan a month, is it so unbearable?
The same netizens who have studied in Spain can't see it, 10,000 yuan is not generous, but it is definitely not a constraint!
And the father, who was hated by her to the bone and insulted to the bone, gave his daughter a month's salary, and he could only cope with a meal at home.
This giant baby, taking the old age for granted, peacefully refused to grow up.
When the demands are not met, they will spit and cry like unandextered babies.
When such people come to society, they will regard themselves as the center of the universe, and the whole world should revolve around them.
But while fighting against this woman, should we also reflect on:
Why do we give everything we have but can't raise grateful children?
02
Behind the ignorant child
Hide the humility of your parents
From the chat records and videos, it can be seen that the father is a very cultured person.
But in front of her daughter, she was always so careful.
In the dialogue with his daughter, he repeatedly stressed, "Dad is not trying to argue with you, he is just reasoning with you."
The most debilitating thing is this sentence: Dad is 51 years old, he is old, and he has no ability to raise you all the time.
The others listened to the words that were all sad, but when they arrived at their daughter, they exchanged an unbearable insult.
The humility of a father and the selfishness of a daughter are all on display.
This kind of humble education is not unique in China.
There was a news story about a little boy who didn't want to go to school, and his mother persuaded him for most of the day, and he played with his mobile phone indifferently.
Mom asked him helplessly, "What do you want to do before you want to go to school?" ”
His son said, "You kneel for me and I'll go to school." ”
Unexpectedly, the mother really knelt down to her son without saying a word.
Her son, seeing his mother kneeling on the spot to persuade him to go to school, happily cocked Erlang's legs.
He even took a mobile phone and took a photo of his mother kneeling and sent it to the circle of friends to show off.
And this mother, kneeling for an hour.
But instead of going to school, the son ignored his kneeling mother and continued to play with his mobile phone.
The child's indifference and disdain make people shudder.
Many parents will mistakenly compromise and mistakenly think that it is to give their children respect and love.
When children are young, they don't understand things, and when they grow up, they know that their parents are not easy.
But the old ancestors have long given us a reminder:
"When you are a child, you are too doting, you develop arrogance, and when you are a little longer, you should be appeased, indulge in his rogue heart, have a lot of evil attitudes, have habits since childhood, and want to change it for a long time?"
Parents humbly back down again and again, which will only allow their children to "override" themselves.
Over time, the child will feel that everything is taken for granted, and the good things in the world are their own.
Such a child, when encountering unhappiness, will always blame the parents, but do not blame themselves.
But those children who you can't discipline hard, society will teach you.
03
Children make their parents suffer
The world also makes children suffer
In August 2018, on the G334 train to Beijing, a man occupied another person's seat.
He also harassed the flight attendants who came to dissuade him, saying that he "could not get up and could not return his seat."
It was confirmed that the man was a Doctor who was studying at Won kwang University in South Korea.
After this incident, the man was fined 200 yuan and restricted from buying tickets to take the train for a certain period of time. Later, he was listed as a serious dishonest.
Today, when he pays attention to credibility, he has also tasted the pain of being unable to move forward.
Remember the 25-year-old who studied in Japan for 5 years?
Because he hated his mother for not being able to meet his living expenses, he stabbed his mother who came to pick him up 9 times, causing his life to be in danger.
After being arrested and imprisoned, the four words "great future" have nothing to do with him.
Parenting expert Li Meijin once said:
"When the child is 3 years old, you do not meet his requirements, and he will roll all over the place at most;
But when he's 15, he may self-harm, commit suicide, and argue with you;
But when he's 20, he may resent you or even attack you. ”
Habitual children are like killing children, and coddling is not love, but a chronic poison that destroys a child and family.
Chinese-style giant babies, parents are still tolerated, but society is not so benevolent.
Chinese parents, it's time to wake up.
The path you take for your child will eventually become his pit.
04
True "rich nourishment"
It is a spiritual advanced education
"Giant babies" are not cultivated in a day, but the formation of consciousness and the accumulation of habits that begin from an early age.
A sound personality should be a person with an independent soul and always "with others in his heart".
True prosperity should be spiritual, and children should receive these three kinds of education from an early age.
The first is to "share" education.
To love children, we must be willing to "send" children.
When a child is seriously needed by adults, it will make him feel a strong sense of responsibility for others and the world.
Even simply doing some housework within their reach can make them more aware of sharing and giving.
The real situation at home should also let the child know, let the child participate in every big and small thing in the family, so that they can truly become a part of the family.
When the economic conditions at home are not good, you can guide the child: if you buy fewer toys and eat fewer snacks, it is a great contribution to our family.
Let the child know that all the gains are not taken for granted, and be grateful for the efforts of others.
The second is "rules" education.
Professor Li Meijin once talked about the way to make rules.
After the child is four or five years old and eats at the table, he should make a rule for the child: if the adult does not move the chopsticks, you cannot eat first.
Children generally after school, four or five o'clock began to be hungry, parents will feel that the child is growing body, hungry then eat first.
In fact, it is not bad for the child to be hungry for an hour, and you can set an afternoon tea time to eat something to fill your stomach first.
But this process of making rules cannot be omitted, so that children know what to do and what not to do.
Children who do not have rules often lack reverence for rules.
The lack of rule awareness will not only make children more difficult to teach as they get older, but it will also be difficult for them to clearly know where the boundaries of their behavior are.
And this is precisely the biggest thunder on the road of children's growth.
The third is "self-reliance" education.
Yang Dai's father said: Educating children to be independent is better than being the first.
Indeed, children who are not independent, no matter how good, are difficult to live happily.
Materially nibbling on the old and mentally unanheated are manifestations of inability to be independent.
I have seen such a sentence on the Internet:
You didn't teach him to tie his shoelaces when he was 8, but he did learn it at 20.
But at the age of 20, he should have worked to earn money to support himself, but he only learned to tie his shoelaces.
Human capacity is gradual.
When you are 8 years old, you don't let him organize his school bag, when you are 18 years old, you don't let him deal with trouble alone, and when you are 28 years old, you give him money to buy designer shoes, it is difficult to ensure that he will not be 48 years old and still nibbling on old age.
The educator Makarenko said:
"Everything is given to the child, everything is sacrificed for him, even at the expense of his own happiness." This is the most terrible gift a parent can give to a child. ”
Letting go is a kind of wisdom and a deeper love.
The end point of all education should be to let children become qualified people, and then consider becoming qualified talents.
Click "Watching" and encourage you!