Educate your children as soon as possible, don't wait for your children to grow up, and let this society educate you. Teach your child early, and your child will be grateful to you later, without being indulged when he should be disciplined.
—— To parents
Every parent who dotes on their child,
It all comes at a cost
Parents love their children, and Ben is the most beautiful feeling.
However, many times, parents love too deeply and love too urgently, eager to pave the way for their children for a lifetime and let him finish in one step.
But I forget that tolerating too much is condoning, and spoiling too much is coddling.
Children who grow up in doting only know how to take care of their own feelings, cannot understand the hardships of others, and do not have the ability to learn to love.
We help our children too much, which is actually the biggest obstacle to their growth.
Deprive the child of the opportunity to dare to try, deprive the child of the opportunity to feel it himself, and deprive the child of the opportunity to make mistakes on the road to growth.
Everything is following the road we have paved, but we do not consider the children's thoughts and feelings, but blindly impose the ideas of adults on the children.
Love him, you must learn to let go, the greenhouse can not grow towering trees, children will eventually learn to face everything!
To love a child is to make him suffer from labor
Yang Dai's father said: Educating children to be independent is better than being the first.
But in the child-centered family model, where will be willing to let the children do it, parents line up to wait.
Thirsty, the water cup is delivered to the hand; the room is chaotic, and someone cleans it up; when you are older, the school is so heavy, and there are so many interest classes, where is the time to be busy with these trivial and complicated life things?
Speaking of labor education, in fact, it is inseparable from family education, and doing housework is one of the good labor education.
Children's ability to do housework is often underestimated and ignored by parents. But it has a profound impact on the growth of children.
Harvard university scholars once did a survey and came to the following conclusion:
Compared with children who do not love housework, the employment rate is 15:1 in adulthood, while the crime rate is 1:10.
Children who love to do housework have a higher mental health index and a family happiness index. Even academically, children who regularly do housework tend to perform better.
Many times, we think that we are loving our children and taking care of all the housework for our children, but doing so will harm the children!
Compared with the study of knowledge, the training of practical life ability is the foundation that cannot be ignored in education.
The problem-solving skills, self-discipline habits, and life-loving attitudes that children initially learn in the family will accompany them throughout their lives and become the most important qualities necessary for them to achieve happiness.
To love a child is to let him suffer from setbacks
Pain and frustration are necessary for growth.
Children's growth needs "love", but the essence of love, the art of love, and the expression of love are not only giving, not just satisfying, but also not accommodating, not letting children feel "happy" forever.
Life and death, encounter and parting, happiness and pain, have always appeared in pairs.
Growing children must also undergo "paired" education, and must be allowed to experience a psychological pain, restraint, and patience.
Properly educating children with some setbacks is a compulsory course in children's lives.
If a child, on the road to growth, can only accept happiness and cannot bear a little pain, the problem is very serious.
Parents often ask: What if the child can't afford to lose?
When I can't finish my homework, I cry;
When the game is lost, I lose my temper:
"I'll never play with you again!" ......
These are all because children do not establish a correct concept of winning and losing, or when adults play with children, they blindly accommodate and let children go.
We need to make it clear to our children that there are many possibilities for the game, some people will win, some people will lose, but these are only temporary, and there will be more challenges in the future.
Losing is not terrible, fear of losing is terrible.
Jimmy said in "I'm Not a Perfect Kid":
"The sadder the world, the happier I want to be." When the heart is more sinister, the kinder I am. When setbacks come, I have to stand up for them.
I want to be an optimistic person, not to shrink back, not to give in, not to complain, to be brave enough to accept all the challenges of life. ”
To love a child, you must let him suffer from reading
No matter how much parents love their children, they must also be willing to let him suffer from reading.
"The best way to ruin a child is to let him live his life in the way he likes."
When children are young, their understanding of the world and the future is not comprehensive, and they have no rational planning and thinking about life.
At this time, if parents blindly pursue to let their children enjoy freedom because of their soft hearts, and do not let their children learn the skills they should learn, then when the children wake up, they will regret it.
Parents with foresight will make up their minds to let their children not enjoy happiness at the age of hardship, not to indulge in the age of learning, and not to give up at the age of hard work.
You know, for ordinary families, reading is still the most effective way to change their destiny.
Reading can change a person's class, a person's income, a person's insight, a person's connections...
In this world, there is no road that is a shortcut in life, but reading is a truly relatively easy road.
Therefore, when the child wants to give up, parents must be fierce and educate the child not to give up halfway.
Eat bitterly, and be a superior person.
Everyone loves stories of getting rich overnight and success without having to work hard, but life is not a fairy tale.
Don't choose ease in the age of struggle, don't give up reading in the years of learning.
After many years, you will find that those years of hard reading are only the lightest suffering you have endured in this life.
Discipline and punishment are the best love for children
Huang Lei said: There are as many parents as there are in the world, and there are no duplicate parents. Because every home is different.
Parents should think from the perspective of their children, not be selfish parents. Because often love is too much, it is selfish love. That kind of love hurts more than hate.
Parents may not all hope that their children will become dragons, but every parent hopes that their children will one day become a mature and independent adult and live a life they like.
But true freedom is expensive.
There are no greenhouses outside the campus, and there are no children's plays when I grow up.
You can coddle your children, but the outside world won't.
Instead of waiting for children to be beaten by society in the future, it is better to correctly educate children from an early age.
"Parents love their children, and they have far-reaching plans."
Parents who truly love their children must have foresight, must be far-sighted, and will be able to start from the children's longer-term future.
![When school started, a teacher's mother gave parents a 4-piece set of "saving your life", and the sentence is the truth![fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)