Recently brushed a police documentary "Guarding the Liberation of the West", one of which recorded such a real case -
The man was reported following the 16-year-old girl, and during the investigation of the case, it was learned that the 16-year-old girl had miscarried 3 times, because she could not even wear underwear because of an staulin infection, and carried multiple condoms with her.
The policewoman asked: Why are you not wearing underwear?
Girl: I have a disease, A gynecological disease, and it hurts to wear panties.
The girl stood up and suddenly lifted her skirt for the female police officer to see, and the female police officer who had seen countless big scenes was still startled.
The policewoman asked hesitantly: Have you ever been pregnant?
Adolescent girls: 3 miscarriages, 2 inductions.
Female Officer: Induction of labour, months, when?
Girl: For more than five months, I didn't know it at the time, thinking that I was sick and my stomach was getting bigger day by day.
The female officer told her to open her bag and take a look.
The girl was hesitant: there was something in the bag that shouldn't have appeared.
The contents of the bag were pulled out, several condoms.
The female officer asked: What are you doing with these things?
Girl: Just the boy next door.
The female police officer asked: Was it forced or voluntary?
Teenage Girl: Voluntary.
Later, the girl was taken away by her sister, and there was no mention of or any footage of her parents in the program.
I am a woman and a mother, and looking at this girl who is less than 16 years old, this real experience makes me and my girlfriend who is also a mother, tears flow down.
This girl, who had sex for the first time, is estimated to be less than 14 years old, and in the absence of sex education, continuous miscarriages, illness, physical and mental pain, and experienced too much trauma...
01
absence of parents,
Leaving children is a broken life
It is said that childhood trauma must be healed with a lifetime, and indeed, parents who are absent in childhood will bring their children a fragmented and painful life.
In the movie "Detachment", there are two girls, which impressed me.
Meredith is a chubby girl who has a natural sense of art and writes about her tormented souls. However, she was bullied by her classmates at school, and at home, her father scolded her for being too negative in her paintings, and even said that she was not doing her job.
Social setbacks, misunderstandings from her parents, loneliness and helplessness, eventually she loses confidence in life and goes to death.
Another girl, Erica, never mentions her background in the film, only that she is a misguided girl who provides "services" to people on the street or even on the bus in exchange for a living.
But when Henry took her home, let her take a bath, cooked for her, and when Erica gained her dignity as a human being, we saw that after taking off heavy makeup and changing into her daily clothes, she was so young and cute, and her eyes were full of light.
Henry says in the film: "Before trying to become a parent, people should make sure they meet that standard and don't experiment at home."
In real life, there are also many cases of children going astray due to lack of parental care.
In the column "Daddy, Love Me Again", the woman who returned from the robbery (who had committed theft) asked her father to "love me again", and the girl once said that her father's indifference to her since childhood, regardless of whether she asked or not, was an important factor in her misdirection.
And when she was looking forward to meeting her with the shirt she made for her father, she still did not wait for her father, and in the only video, her father still responded coldly: "There will be similar things happening in the future, and there will be a law to punish her"...
The misfortune of the family, the absence of parents, the distortion of the concept of money, and the lack of sex education push them step by step into the abyss. What's more, they will feel that accompanying guests, surrogacy, and selling eggs are just a career choice...
The hardest thing in the world is to raise children, and this most important thing does not need to pass any exams, and many parents are unqualified, unaware, and introspective, which is the biggest tragedy of education.
02
What is it like to have seen a child who loves?
A study at the University of Michigan in the United States shows that 69% of girls believe that their self-confidence stems from their father's pampering and praise. So, what kind of girl is it like to be truly nurtured by love?
Big 00, recorded her thanks to her parents before the wedding. It also allows us to see a generous, excellent, confident girl with the light of love.
"Although I didn't lose 110 pounds, I'm definitely the most beautiful bride in your eyes, right?" I also feel like the most beautiful bride. In fact, I have always felt that I am beautiful and excellent, and I always show everyone that I "feel good about myself". ”
Since childhood, her parents would take her to high-end restaurants to teach her Western food etiquette, and also take her to eat her favorite junk food. Take her on a tour of famous mountains and rivers; share reading experiences at family book clubs, and share their happy and troublesome things in daily chats.
What is a child who is loved enough?
In the limited time and conditions of the parents----
Spiritually, he is also a teacher and a friend.
From her father's brilliant greetings at the wedding, the love and entrustment in her eyes, it can be seen that she must be a girl who is nourished by love.
When talking about what has made her current self, she said that it is the high-quality companionship of her parents who has shaped her current self. The love of her parents makes her cheerful, confident, brave and determined. In the soil of love, love can grow like love.
03
Write at the end
I support the right to be born with free choice, but is it to respect the free will of children, even if they have gone astray?
As a parent, don't make excuses for your laziness, slackness, and ignorance.
In the comic "Under One Man", when Xia He, the "bone scraper" who was born with a seductive body, met with the Old Heavenly Master of Dragon Tiger Mountain, there was a particularly good dialogue:
Old Heavenly Master: Little Lady, your courage is also big enough, an all-sex demon, when you meet the Dragon tiger mountain old Heavenly Master, don't you hurry up? Xia He: If you don't let me go, how will I go? Old Master: The feet are on you, whether you can walk or not, take that road, what kind of road to take, decide for yourself. The same is true of what kind of person you are and what you are. Xia He: The Dragon Tiger Mountain Heavenly Master is a hundred-year-old person, how can he still say stupid things! Too often, the appearance of you and me is determined by others.
Old Master: Yes, the road you want to take, it's not easy to walk, it's not easy to be a person, it's all said that you can't help yourself, it's not nonsense. How can the body be self-contained? Do it yourself.
May every angelic child be lucky enough to meet imperfect but loving parents. If not, may you meet mentors and friends and transcend your provenance.
I hope that every parent can give him gentleness, support, courage, direction, and love when his child needs you.
Dong Qing shared a passage of writer Liu Yu's text, which is particularly beautiful: "May you grow up slowly, may you have good luck, if not, I hope you learn compassion in misfortune; may you be loved by many people, if not, I hope you learn to be tolerant in loneliness." ”