On the last day of 2015, to do what I have to do every year today, is to choose my annual ten bad.
There is pleasure in watching a good movie, and there is also a pleasure in watching a bad movie. I really like to watch bad movies, just like I like to watch good movies. So, don't say what kind of Shennong I am, and don't feel sorry for me, I am really cool! Especially in recent years, the Chinese bad movies will always surprise you and make you discover, wow. It turns out it can be so bad! Oh my God, it can suck to this point. Oops, this sucks so novelty. Wow rub, that sucks so unique!
The bad film producers in the Chinese film industry always produce and produce one wonderful bad film after another with their vigorous and exuberant creativity. From "Fuchun Mountain Jutu" to "One Life", "Why Sheng Zhenmo", "From Heaven", etc., we need to thank this era, this era where everyone can make movies. There will be so many unforgettable bad films.
Thanks, thanks, moved!
In 2015, I watched more than 120 theatrical films (excluding the Beijing, Shanghai, and Hong Kong film festivals and those I usually watch at home, counting those about 500), which is basically the same as the numbers of previous years, that is, the frequency of about two films a week, basically the popular cinema films are covered. As in previous years, I will also post a ticket stub at the end of this article, which is also my last memory of 2015.
Finally, in 2015, whether good or bad, I said goodbye, and I hope that 2016 can be happier!
【2015, My Cinema Movie Ten Bad Films】 (sorted by release date)
1. "Beijing New York"
Director: Li Xiaoyu
Writers: Li Xiaoyu
Starring: Lin Chiling / Liu Ye / Richard De Klerk / Jiang Shuying / Wang Xiao
Genre: Drama / Romance
It is said that time will dilute memory, but every time I see this poster and the familiar title, I will gradually remember the feelings when I saw "Beijing New York", those difficulties and struggles, those bitterness and helplessness.
While watching this movie, I was really distracted, even bored enough to check if their Chinese and English subtitles were wrong. At the same time, I really thought about my life and calculated how much time I had to waste. Sorry, watching such a movie is inevitable to lose your mind.
The bigger problem is that the whole film is flooded with that kind of disgusting literary and artistic style. The whole film is the assumption of that kind of literary youth, the protagonist must be engaged in art (Lin Chiling's role first hoped to become a world-famous violinist), and the foreigner he met was also a handsome photographer who gave up the financial industry. Then, the male protagonist must be a handsome and obsessive president with a successful career (Liu Ye's role is set as the youngest CEO in China, although I have always had a hard time understanding this setting). As a result, the creator's personal experience is projected as the heroine Lin Chiling (a beautiful, literary, sad woman with artistic pursuits), and at the same time is pursued by a handsome and obsessive president Liu Ye, and another handsome and golden photographer Lao Wai. It is truly the ultimate dream of literary and artistic youth.
And those pretentious and blunt dialogues, well, basically all such fake literary romance films are set.
What is even more difficult to understand is that the whole film is this kind of posing shooting method, the so-called studio aesthetics or the number of roads for photo blockbusters. The problem is, this is not really to take a photo. What is the concave shape from start to finish!
2. "I Am the Queen"
Director: Yi Nengjing
Writers: Wang An'an / Gu Yi / Yi Nengjing
Starring: Song Huiqiao / Dou Xiao / Chen Qiaoen / Yang Youning / Wu Junmei
I still remember watching this film very clearly, that is, to participate in the Beijing Film Festival, just got off the train in the morning, nothing in the morning, just think about going to see a movie, and I chose this one. I could guess that the film wasn't good, but I still didn't expect it to suck so badly. As soon as the whole film was released, Leng gave me a rotten spirit. I spent the night on the train and was very tired. At first glance it was energetic and comfortable.
The whole film is basically the level of Taiwan's third-rate romance drama, a period of unoriginal and twisted love, which will roar and tear at every turn. The characters are also very pathological, and what they think and do is mostly strange and incomprehensible. Interestingly, such a film with actors full of literary dialogue often adds some Internet language to the dialogue. I don't know how these two types of content are mixed together.
3. "Why Sheng Zhen Mo"
Director: Yang Wenjun / Huang Bin
Writers: Morpheler / Gu Man
Starring: Huang Xiaoming / Yang Mi / Tong Dawei / Yang Ying / Xie Yilin / Huang Zitao / Chen Chong / He Sui / Ma Su / Hua Shao / Zeng Zhiwei / Yao Anlin / Sun Yizhou / Kong Lianshun / Shen Tai / Liu Tianzuo
Type: Love
Hahahahahahahaha
People should learn to be grateful, in a lifetime, to meet several such movies, it is also a gift from God! Films like "Why Sheng Zhen Mo" perfectly demonstrate the various problems that amateur film creators may make in film creation. That is, the encyclopedia of "don't make the mistakes that appear in "Why Sheng ZhenMo", your movie will be very good". The film's plot is bloody, the lines are temperamental, the performance is blunt, the narrative is chaotic, and the male and female protagonists love and hate like a tug-of-war. It's breathtaking. Because there are too many slot points, I don't know where to start.
For a long time, though, it became a benchmark. Whenever we see a bad movie again, some people ask: How can it be worse than the sheng zhen?
That's what it's all about.
4. "Zhang Zhen's Ghost Obsession with Storytelling"
Director: Xu Zhengchao
Writers: Xu Zhengchao
Starring: Zhang Han / Zhang Li / Li Xin'ai / Zhang Haoran / Zhu Xiaohui
Genre: Suspense / Thriller
After all, I also grew up listening to Zhang Zhen's ghost stories, of course, not the Zhang Zhen who acted, but the Zhang Zhen who told ghost stories on the radio.
Like all domestic horror films, this "Zhang Zhen Telling Story" does not have ghosts, in the final analysis, it is still a group of mentally ill people and another group of people with ulterior motives who are tossing and turning.
As for the so-called horror, it is still aided by a surprise attack, as if someone suddenly slapped you from behind. And the dangling shots, screaming from start to finish. This group of people is like a drug addict, screaming all the way, whether it is called or not, they all call. It's a bit like the canned laughter of a sitcom, infecting the audience with the screams of the actors, hoping that they too will be stimulated and have a terrifying effect. Of course, the more stimulated is obviously the hearing.
This mental illness is so much, the hospital does not care about the management ?
5. "Gardenia Blossom"
Director: He Jiong
Writers: Ao Li / Nan Luo / Gong Jia / Yang Xiao
Starring: Li Yifeng / Zhang Huiwen / Jiang Jinfu / Wei Daxun / Du Tianhao
If you have to praise a few words about "Gardenia Blossom", it is still stronger than "Why Sheng Zhen Mo".
The so-called art industry has a specialty, and the problem of "Gardenia Blossom" proves that you can be a good host, but you may not be a good director. Compared with the other bad films selected this time, "Gardenia Blossom" is not a superb bad film, its problem is that it is mediocre, especially mediocre. The plot is boring and boring, and it is completely like a nonsense story, the performance is not good, as for the lines, some places are written very disgustingly, especially unlike the literary and artistic style of human words. At the end, you'll think it's ridiculous, heck, what the hell is this?
6. "The Woman of the Dynasty, Yang Guifei"
Director: Shi Qing
Writers: Shi Qing / Wu Nan / Bian Zhihong
Starring: Fan Bingbing / Dawn / Wu Zun / Chen Chong / Tranquility
Type: Romance / Costume
In recent years, they have mainly filmed urban love and youth themes, resulting in a decrease in the number of costume films, which makes people very unhappy. Thanks to this "Woman of the Dynasty, Yang Guifei", this gap can be filled.
Basically, this is a film exclusive to Yang Guifei, or exclusive to Fan Bingbing, and the whole film is her showing off her beauty and costumes. The noble concubines keep changing their shirts, all kinds of good looks. Of course, there is nothing but good looks.
Why do you think this film is exclusive to Yang Guifei? Because Yang Guifei here is a perfect person. It is said that there is no perfect person in the world, and she Yang Guifei is a perfect person. Special finish, there is no place where there is no end. Simple, kind, beautiful, beautiful, do things decently, be kind to people, can ride and jump. Do not interfere in the government, only love. Just such a perfect person, but was forced and framed by all kinds of bad people, evil people, and villains, and died. miserable!
It's hard to accept. Even Yang Guifei in the film herself could not accept this matter, and finally had to question the villains who wanted to kill her. "What the hell am I doing wrong, you have to be so dead, you dead ghosts." Sorry, I can't remember the original words now, the above are all made up by me.
Finally, it's the classic:
There is a bag qingtian in Kaifeng
The iron mask is selfless in distinguishing between loyalty and adultery
Jianghu Haojie came to help
The woman of the dynasty, not Mahan
Very sorry
7. Bride Wars (2015)
Director: Chen Guohui
Writers: Chen Guohui / Gu Wei / Xu Yiliang
Starring: Yang Ying / Ni Ni / Chen Xiao / Zhu Yawen / He Jiong
Genre: Comedy / Romance
In recent years, Chinese films often like to remake foreign movies, and "Bride Wars" is also one of them. The problem is, you remake, remake a little better. What is the point of a film like this that has failed to pass the score in North America to be remade?
It's like having to hire a good teacher to learn? If you first invite an eighteen-rate teacher, how can you teach a good student? The film itself is the kind of way to shoot a romantic comedy as a farce, the film presents an exaggerated state, and the actors will be crazier and more vicious than usual to achieve better comedic effects. At the same time, it is enough to rely on actors with ultra-low IQs to create conflicts and contradictions.
8. "Since Youth Can't Stay"
Director: Tian Meng
Writers: Tian Meng / Shao Yihui / An Zhiyong
Starring: Zhang Han / Chen Qiaoen / Wang Xiaokun / Shi Yufei / Guo Ziqian
Okay, I see. Since youth can't be retained, join hands with Uniqlo!
Eight streams of rotten youth comedy, the plot of various clichés and inexplicable. The heroine played by Chen Qiaoen is relatively large, so it is called spinach. In order to show her boda, every time the camera is rocked to Jon Chen's chest, the sound effect of the cow is added in slow motion. Like a moo... Sound.
In the performance, Zhang Han is still a handsome and cool me affectionate style. In fact, he should try to break through himself and play some roles that are completely opposite to the previous image, such as ugly monsters or mental retardation. Only by trying to challenge yourself can you make a breakthrough. Now it is always this set of rich and handsome, big handsome guy setting, too terrible.
9. "Descending from Heaven"
Director: Wei Nan / Wei Min
Writers: Li Qian / Wei Min / Yang Jun / You Sihan
Starring: Chen Xuedong / Zhang Yixing / Jiang Wen / Li Xiaolu / Ouyang Junwen
Genre: Comedy
If you choose the worst bad movie from all the movies this year, it must be this one.
If you choose a bad movie from all the movies this year that is a little worse than this one, sorry, I can't find it.
If you choose a bad movie from all the movies this year that is a big worse movie than this one, why are you so idle!
There is no doubt that "Descending from Heaven" is the worst film of the year, and the film demonstrates what kind of film can be produced when the creator has no film aesthetic, lacks basic production knowledge, and the necessary efforts. Probably, it is "Descending from Heaven". This is the level of a ten-tier town private TV station column drama, the inferior imitation show of the nine-stream variety show. A pseudo-sitcom with zero acting skills, no fun, and pure illness. Rotten out of the sky, film history left a name.
10. "Villain Angel"
Director: Yu Baimei / Deng Chao
Writers: Yu Baimei
Starring: Deng Chao / Sun Li / Dai Lele / Liang Chao / Yang Xinming
It is said that it is a madman who sings a play, and it is a fool who watches a play. If the singers come up and make fools of themselves, those who watch the drama will be driven crazy.
"Villain Angel" is such a comedy that relies on pretending to be crazy and selling stupidity to amuse, through the exaggerated performances of the actors, all kinds of monkeys playing clowns, eager to make the audience laugh. Moreover, when the film itself has to use the bridge sections such as licking, eating nose, and eating flies to create laughter, it actually makes it clear that yes, we are stinky. If you see someone stepping on stinky and laugh, we should also think it's funny.
Of course, this kind of movie that relies on pulling down the IQ to be funny is more to bring people physical discomfort. The most hateful thing is that such a movie, even daring to shoot 120 minutes, really can't stand it. Such a bad movie, making such a long film is a crime, you know?
Of course, to be fair, this film is still stronger than "Descending from Heaven", please come on.
In addition to the above mentioned, there are many bad movies this year, but the number of bad places is limited and cannot be mentioned one by one. Let's list them all below. In fact, some of them are even worse than the top, but maybe they are too influential or not typical, so I didn't choose them. Including so-called variety movies, like "Run! Brothers, I don't think it is necessary to talk about it, if you have to talk about it, I just want to say that Li Chen is a white tiger.
This year's bad films also include (only what I have seen): "The Seventh Son: The Battle of the Demons", "There Is a Kind of You Love Me", "All the Way To Surprise", "There Is a Place Only We Know", "Zhong Kui Voldemort", "Legend of the White Ghost", "Rock Hero", "Rampage Hollywood", "The Third Kind of Love", "Nine-Story Demon Tower", "Sudden Star Movement", "Incredible" and so on
There are a lot of videos that don't mention it, not because they don't suck, but because I haven't seen it. For example, "Small Times 4"
Just stop here, bless 2015, this year is really very pleasant, I hope that 2016 can have more surprises.
Finally, the ticket stubs, from left to right, are the ticket stubs of cinema viewing in 2012, 2013, 2014 and 2015
Finally, in the end, I would like to thank the fans of various bad films and the water army for their love and support for me over the past year, greeting me, caring for me, and satisfying me every day in various ways such as comments, private messages, soybean oil, etc. Thank you.
Like you said, even if this film is rotten, it can't be scolded, after all, it is the hard work of other actors and directors, and it is also the fruit of people's labor, how can they be so disrespectful of their hard work?
I think you're right, so I decided to make all this crap on the last day of 2015.
Please accept my prayers!!!