Today, my son picked up an electric stove in the trash can downstairs, it can't be where someone put it? Can you pick it up? I seem to see the curiosity and joy in his eyes when he picked it up, he came home with this electric stove like a treasure, and told me with great interest how he picked it up.
"Mom, when I was throwing out the garbage, I saw that the electric stove was placed next to it, it seemed to be new, so I picked it up, we don't have an electric stove at home, you can use it for us. He said excitedly.
"How can you pick up other people's things? Maybe someone put them there on purpose. I rebuked him.
"But no one wants it, maybe someone doesn't want it, we can pick it up and use it." He replied unconvinced.
I took a deep breath and felt helpless. This child's personality is always so stubborn and kind, he always thinks that the things he picks up are worth cherishing and using. I know how important this electric stove is to him, although the living facilities at home are simple, but I have been trying to make him live a good life, this electric stove should be a new hope and expectation for him.
But I also know that such behavior is wrong, and if it is seen by others, it will leave a bad impression on people. Instead of letting him learn badly, it is better to remind him to know how to respect the fruits of other people's labor and personal belongings.
"Son, we can't just take other people's things, let's put this electric stove back, or wait a little while to ask if any neighbors have put it there. I tried to persuade him in a calm tone.
He frowned, clearly not having accepted my opinion yet. I know that saying anything at this time will not change his mind, and he needs time to accept such a reality. I decided to put the topic aside for now and wait until I calmed down before I had a good talk with him.
This little episode gave me an unexpected thing to think about. The son's kind, stubborn, and naughty character is a shadow of his father. While they are different in many ways, I was surprised by the similarities in some places. I am also thinking about how I should guide him and how to regulate his behavior, not simply teaching him right and wrong, but teaching him how to be a more resilient and kind person.
As a result, this electric stove incident became a topic of conversation in our family. Although it is up in the balance, I know that this may be a different change in the relationship between me and my son. Perhaps, this is a new beginning, an opportunity for me to learn more about the inner world of children.
Just as I was thinking about how to communicate with my son, an even more sudden contradiction happened. That day, my son and I were preparing to cook at home, and he took out the electric stove that he had picked up earlier. I was about to remind him to put it back again, when suddenly there was a sharp knock on the door. I walked to the door and saw that it was our neighbor's aunt who had come to visit.
"Xiao Zhang, it seems that something is missing from my house, do you see any suspicious people or things?" said the neighbor's aunt anxiously.
I didn't know how to answer for a while, but my son suddenly interjected: "Auntie, our house is downstairs, I just have something to tell you, you can come in and sit for a while." ”
The neighbor's aunt followed us into the house with some confusion. The son took out the electric stove he had picked up and explained it to the neighbor's aunt.
"Auntie, I'm sorry, I picked it up next to the trash can, I don't know it's your ......," the son said in a whisper.
After listening to this, the neighbor's aunt looked at us with emotion and said, "Young man, I know you are kind, but you can't take things casually. This is a temporary trash can at my house, and I'm still looking forward to getting it back. ”
After hearing this, the son lowered his head and apologized. I also hurriedly persuaded: "I'm sorry Auntie, I didn't discipline him well and made him misunderstand, and we will return the electric stove to you immediately." ”
The neighbor's aunt nodded and smiled, she gently patted her son's shoulder and said, "Young man, seeing that you are so sincere, I don't blame you." I hope you will be more careful in the future. ”
After the neighbor's aunt left, my son and I sat on the sofa and were silent for a long time. I could clearly feel my son's inner struggle and remorse, and he knew that this was a mistake that should not have happened. I gently patted him on the shoulder and said to him, "Son, everyone makes mistakes, the key is to learn from them and learn to correct them." ”
The son nodded, his eyes full of self-reproach. I know that this incident is a profound lesson for him, and it will be an asset to him on his way to growth. Family education is a meticulous and complex science, teaching children to be human beings is far from just a simple moral concept, but also requires a deep inner understanding and the patient guidance of parents.
This experience also made me deeply aware that as a mother, I need to pay more attention to the growth and education of my son. He will be more determined on the road of growth because of my words and a support. I want to be not only his guide, but also his strong backing. This is not only the handling of individual incidents, but also a deep reflection on family affection and growth. I look forward to growing up with him in the years to come.
In the days since it happened, I've been thinking about how to communicate with my son and teach him about the importance of respect and responsibility. Whenever I see my son's sincere eyes, there is always a sense of softness and understanding in my heart. He was just a kid after all, the world was new to him, and he needed time to understand and get to know it.
However, new contradictions have inadvertently crept in. That day, my son's school teacher came to me and said that he had an argument with a classmate in class and even started a fight. I was shocked, how could this have happened? I immediately went to my son and asked him what had happened. He bowed his head and confessed the truth, his voice half stubborn and half guilty.
"Mom, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have hit someone. But they said something nasty, and I couldn't help it. He whispered.
Hearing such a bitter apology, the anger in my heart was swept away, replaced by a kind of powerlessness and heartache. I know that he was not an aggressive child, but he lost his mind in this incident. I tried desperately to suppress the resentment in my heart, but instead took a deep breath to calm my mind.
"Son, it's not right to fight, no matter what the other person says, we have to learn to solve problems with words, not with hands. I said earnestly.
His eyes flashed with dissatisfaction and grievance, as if seeking a glimmer of understanding. "But Mom, what they said was too much. I'm also here to protect myself. ”
I understand his struggles, but in my worldview, violence is never the way to solve problems. At the same time, I also realized that this incident was also the result of my lack of care and teaching on his growth path. Perhaps, I was too busy with daily chores and ignored the changes and needs of his heart, which led him to choose the wrong solution.
This incident has become another contradiction and communication between me and my son. I understand that it is not enough to simply teach and criticize, I need to know more about his inner world and try to see things from his point of view. And this process is far from being as simple as I imagined.
I know that there is much more to the entanglement between us than these two things. My son is at the beginning of his life, and the run-ins and conflicts between us are part of growing up. Perhaps, this is an opportunity for me and him to move forward, an opportunity for us to understand each other better. I also firmly believe that as long as we listen to each other with our hearts and tolerate each other, our love and affection will become more and more indestructible.
Just as the conflict between me and my son had not yet settled, another incident occurred that I did not expect. That night, I was busy preparing dinner in the kitchen when my son suddenly pulled out a worn-out jigsaw puzzle and walked up to me with tears in his eyes.
"Mom, this is a puzzle toy that Dad used to be when he was a child, why didn't you give it to me?" his voice was full of grievances and dissatisfaction.
I stopped what I was doing, and a wave of guilt and helplessness welled up in my heart. I have been avoiding talking about this matter, hoping that my son will forget this unpleasant past. But now that my son has raised the question, I can't avoid it anymore.
"This ...... Actually, your dad's childhood toys are indeed here, but your mom didn't give them to you because ...... "I'm trying to find a reasonable explanation."
"Because of what? Don't you think Dad's things when he was a kid are important? You don't respect Dad!" his tone was full of anger and grievance.
"No, son, of course your father's stuff is important, but it may not be of that much value to you now, and ......" I was a little confused, but I didn't know how to explain it.
"And what? And you can just dispose of Daddy's stuff?" the son's voice was a little high-pitched.
I always felt that he couldn't quite understand the choices and decisions of some adults, but I was overwhelmed by the anger and loss in his heart. The son in front of him was desperate for some of his father's belongings, and it seemed that he was longing for some connection with his father.
I put down what I was doing and sat down to listen to him. From his words, I gradually understood his longing and longing for his father, and I also realized that my image in my son's heart had a lot to do with the memory of his father. This incident gave me a revelation, and also made me realize more clearly that the son's deep desire and concern for his father cannot be resolved by simple explanation and logic.
I poured my son a glass of warm water and gently encouraged him: "Son, some of your father's things are still there, but we think it will be more meaningful for you if you can one day clean up your father's things." After all, some of his things are also important to us, and we don't want you to affect your mood and growth now because of these things. ”
I tried to comfort him, but my son's anger did not dissipate. This incident also made me reflect on my attitude and choices in the process of my child's growth, whether there are some things that should be more considerate of my son, more tolerant and understanding.
As these contradictions occurred, I felt anxious and uneasy in my heart again. I understand that disputes and conflicts within the family are not so easy to resolve, but I also never want to see these problems affect our parent-child relationship. Next, I need to think carefully and deal with it to find a way to make our family more harmonious.
Soon, a new paradox occurred between me and my son. On this day, my son did not come home for a long time, which made me a little worried. By the time he returned, it was late at night.
"Why did you come back so late, what happened?" I asked with concern.
"It's nothing, it's just playing outside, and before you know it, it's getting late. He replied evasively.
I didn't fully believe his explanation, after all, it wasn't the first time that he had returned late. I sighed deeply and felt a little heavy inside. I know it's a question of communication and trust, and I need to talk to my son about it. Even though I was angry, I struggled to suppress my emotions when I faced my son.
"Son, do you know how worried my mother is when I come home so late at night? I said.
"I know, but it's fine, I'm just out there for a while, I'm sorry to worry you. He scratched his head in embarrassment.
"Son, it's very important to be honest with your mother. You know, mom always wants you to be a responsible person, but also to know how to respect and take into account the feelings of your family. "I tried to communicate with him in a gentle tone.
He hung his head and was silent for a moment, clearly feeling a little guilty about my words. It's a scene I don't usually see because he's always so stubborn and naughty.
"I'm sorry, Mom. Next time I'll definitely go home early and stop running around. He said with a stumbling voice.
I know this is just the beginning. But I believe that no matter what happens, the relationship between me and my son will become stronger and closer because of these events. Family conflicts and problems are unavoidable, but as long as we can be honest with each other, understand and tolerate, then our relationship will definitely be stronger.
These things have become opportunities for us to grow and communicate, and they are also the bonds of our emotional communication with each other. The more this happens, the more I look forward to spending time with my son, as if there is a new beginning between us, a beginning of more maturity and understanding.