I was suddenly very hungry that day, so I called a friend to give me a number, I saw a breakfast shop on the way to the hotel before it closed and wanted to eat a lot of food, walked to the door of the store and bought a few buns to eat, suddenly the phone rang, a commotion voice asked me: Sir, what kind of "goods" do you want? I was just about to open my mouth, when the man who bought corn next to me said, "I want to be older, tender and chewy." Another person who bought tea eggs said: It should be rotten, otherwise it will not taste good. After that, the other party said: Okay, you are satisfied, so I hung up the phone, I ......
I made a scrambled egg with tomatoes for dinner today, and the soy sauce was added a little black. My husband came back and said, "What is this?" I said casually: fried tomatoes... Black eggs. It's so TM witty!!
A: "I heard that our company hired a new employee with average ability, why did you hire him?" B: "I heard that on the day of recruitment, he forgot to bring his resume, so he called, and his elderly father personally sent it!" A: "The examiner was impressed like this?" B: "What else, the director has sent his resume to his son!" ”
Just after getting off work, a beggar came. He looked at me with a broken bowl in both hands. Looking at his pleading eyes, I reluctantly accepted the money.
Xiao Ming stole a chicken and was plucking the chicken by the river, when a policeman came over, Xiao Ming quickly threw the chicken into the river, and the policeman asked: What are you doing? What's in the river? Xiao Ming said: That's a chicken, he wants to cross the river, ask me to help it look at the clothes......
When a skinny buddy arrives home, he finds that his wife is stealing a man! The buddy was trembling with anger, but he didn't dare to attack. I had to retreat gently, and locked the door with my hand, and then dialed a phone: "Mom, it's not good!" Your daughter locked herself in her room and said she was going to commit suicide Within ten minutes, the mother-in-law's family came. There were three cars of people.......
On the way back from work at night, a burly drunk man sang "Betray my love and leave behind my back". I casually hummed, "I know the truth and my tears remain." The drunkard told me to stand there, and I was so frightened that I didn't dare to move, and then shouted at me: I tell you, sing and start by yourself in the future!
My grandfather retired and enrolled in the University for the Elderly, and my grandson, who was in the first grade, asked curiously, "Are you still studying?" Grandpa said, "What's wrong with me studying?" The grandson said, "It's good, but if your school notifies you to hold a parent-teacher conference, what will you do?"
Four years ago, my wife told me to get a card, each person to save 500 per month, I take the card, she knows the password, no one can spend it, and don't tell the children how much money is in it, and when they die, surprise them! It wasn't until yesterday that I found out that she tied the card to WeChat, and it was also tied to another shopping website, and then I checked, and there were still a few dollars in the card, wife, aren't you afraid that after we die, the children will not even burn the paper for us after seeing that there are only a few dollars?
A beautiful colleague is a few years older than me, and the relationship has always been good, today I asked her curiously, why don't you get married? She said that she didn't find a suitable one, so I asked again, what are the conditions for you to find a boyfriend? She smiled faintly and said four words, "Morning flowers and evening picks", I thought to myself with a confused face, this endless guess, when is the head!