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Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

author:Theory of Modern and Contemporary History
Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

Churchill's life is a legend.

Churchill was born into an aristocratic family in England on November 30, 1874. When he left this world on January 24, 1965, he left behind not only his past achievements, but also more important thoughts and spirits.

He worked as a war correspondent, the inventor of "Scissorhands", and a great hero of the anti-fascist movement; He was the vanguard of the anti-Soviet struggle and the initiator of the Cold War.

He was a first-rate orator (poisonous tongue) and a conservative politician; He is also a Nobel Prize winner in literature and an expert knitter.

People around me say that the big round head is extremely active, and he can come up with hundreds of new ideas every day......

Churchill left too many mysteries, but the only thing we know for sure: he was an interesting man.

Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

▲ Churchill let this victory mark spread around the world

One

British Prime Minister Winston Churchill had a habit of jumping into a steaming bathtub whenever he finished his work. Then paced around the house naked.

During World War II, Churchill once came to the White House and asked for military assistance from the United States. While he was pacing naked in the bathroom of the White House, there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Come in, come in."

He shouted. As soon as the door opened, it was Roosevelt who appeared in the doorway. When he saw that Churchill was naked, he turned and tried to withdraw.

"Come in, Mr. President," cried Churchill with his arms outstretched, "the Prime Minister of Great Britain has nothing to hide from the President of the United States." ”

The two burst into laughter. Britain received full-fledged military assistance from the United States.

Two

After the 1945 British general election, Prime Minister Winston Churchill stepped down. Sir Pym visited Churchill and told him the results of the election.

At the time, Churchill was lying in the bathtub bathing, and when he heard the bad news, he humorously said: "They have every right to remove me from power." This is democracy! That's what we've been fighting for! Now—please hand me the towel. ”

For Churchill, the struggle was not for power, but for democracy in Great Britain.

Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

▲In addition to politics and writing, Churchill was also an amateur painter

Three

During World War II, Churchill had a distinguished service to the defense of England. When he abdicated after the war, the British Parliament proposed to pass a proposal to create a bronze statue of Churchill and place it in a park for everyone to admire.

Churchill refused: "Thank you for your kindness, I'm afraid birds like to on my bronze statue, so please excuse me!" ”

Four

One day. Churchill was asked what it takes to be a politician. Churchill replied: "A statesman must be able to predict things that will happen tomorrow, next month, the year to come, and to come." ”

The man asked, "What if the prophecy is not fulfilled by then?" ”

Churchill said, "Then there is another reason to give it." ”

Five

A charming young woman said to Churchill, "There are two things about you that I don't like. "Which two?"

"The new policy you enforce and the beard on your mouth."

"Madam", Churchill politely replied, "please do not care, you do not have the opportunity to touch any of them. ”

Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

▲ Churchill and his wife

Six

Churchill had been a war correspondent in his youth, and once he was captured, he fled. The Boers offered him a 25-pound bounty.

A few years later, he hung his bounty notice in his study with a frame, and told his visitors, "That's my full price, 25 pounds." ”

Seven

During the German occupation of the Netherlands in World War II, the Dutch government-in-exile established its headquarters in the United States.

Prime Minister Dirk Gill, who barely speaks English, held out his hand and said "goodbye" to his British allies at his first meeting with Churchill.

"Sir," Churchill replied, "I want all political meetings to be as short as this. "Eight

At a tea party on Churchill's 75th birthday, a young journalist told Churchill: "I wish I could come back next year to congratulate you on your birthday." ”

Churchill patted the young man on the shoulder and said, "I see that you are so strong, there should be no problem." ”

Nine

When Churchill was young, his academic performance was poor. After becoming Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, he once returned to his alma mater, and the principal and teachers respectfully reported to him about the school.

But he was not interested in any of these situations, saying, "I want to meet the child who has the worst academic performance in school." ”

After the child was brought in, Churchill patted him on the shoulder and said to him affectionately: "I am very grateful to you, because it is you who have firmly held my place." ”

Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

▲ The years have robbed him of his handsome appearance, but they have given him wit, humor and wisdom

Ten

One day, in a hurry to make a speech in the House, Churchill called a taxi. When the car arrived at its destination, Churchill got out of the car and said to the driver, "I'm going to be delayed here for about an hour, so wait for me." ”

"No," the driver replied firmly, "I'm going to rush home so I can listen to Churchill's speech on the radio." ”

When the prime minister heard this, he couldn't help but be surprised, so in addition to paying the fare, he also rewarded the driver with a considerable tip.

The driver looked at the windfall income and quickly changed his mind. He said to Churchill, "I thought about it for a moment, and I'd better wait here to see you back." What the fuck Churchill! ”

Eleven

On one occasion, William Joyson Hicks, a Conservative MP with whom Churchill worked together, spoke in Parliament. Seeing that Churchill was shaking his head in disagreement, he said: "I would like to draw the attention of the distinguished parliamentarians to the fact that I am only expressing my opinion." ”

Churchill replied, "I would also like to draw the attention of the speakers to the fact that I am only shaking my own head." ”

Winston Churchill: Humor comes from wisdom, and vulgarity comes from evil

▲ Churchill in the study

twelve

During one of his visits to the United States, Churchill was invited to dine at a simple restaurant serving cold roast chicken. When it came time to get a second serving of roast chicken, Churchill politely said to the hostess, "May I have some meat for the chicken breast?" ”

"Mr. Churchill," the hostess told him tenderly, "we do not speak of 'breast,' but are accustomed to call it 'white meat,' and the meat of the chicken thighs that is not burned white 'black meat.'" Churchill apologized for his inappropriate remarks, but in his heart he thought it was a bite to say.

The next day, the hostess received a beautiful orchid sent by Churchill, with a card attached to it that read:

"If you would pin it to your 'white flesh,' I would feel great honour——— Churchill."

A baker's dozen

At a banquet for high-ranking officials and dignitaries, the atmosphere was warm and laughter was loud.

Halfway through, an officer of the Protocol Department approached Churchill and whispered to him that he had seen Mr. so-and-so stuff a silver salt jar into his pocket.

Hearing this, Churchill publicly shoved a silver pepper jar into his pocket as if no one had seen it.

At the end of the feast, Churchill crept up to the gentleman who had taken the salt jar and whispered to him:

"My dear, we are all seen by others. Hey, it's better to put it back, you say? ”

fourteen

On the eve of the Battle of El Alamein, Churchill summoned his right-hand man, General Montgomery. During the conversation, Churchill suggested that he should study logic.

Fearing that he would get bogged down in a logical proposition, Montgomery made an excuse to prevaricate.

He said to Churchill: "Mr. Prime Minister, you know, there is a proverb: 'Knowledge and intimacy produce contempt.'" Perhaps the more I study logic, the more I despise it. ”

Churchill took off his pipe and said, "But I warn you that nothing can be produced without a certain degree of understanding and intimacy." ”

fifteen

Churchill smiled on his deathbed and said to those who were guarding him: "I am ready to go to God, whether God is ready to torture me or not." ”