When a stranger asks you, "Don't you know me?" "How would you feel?
My reaction was red and ashamed!
It was on a train from Beijing to Changsha.
As soon as I got in the car, I turned on my computer and sorted out the photos.
Sitting next to me was a middle-aged man in his fifties and sixties, and I barely noticed his presence.
He sat next to him and watched for a long time and started talking to me.
He said, "Are you an artist?" ”
I said, "I'm a lecturer." ”
He said, "What lessons?" ”
I said, "Business management." ”
He said, "Seeing you sort out the photos, I thought you were a photographer." ”
I said, "Hobby! ”
I said, "You're an artist, aren't you?" ”
He said, "Don't you know me?" ”
I thought to myself, oh no, I must have met a celebrity.
At that time, I was extremely ashamed in my heart, I didn't know any celebrities I met, how could you make people embarrassed?
I was a little scared, so I quickly looked at the man next to me and confirmed that I didn't know him.
I shook my head in utter shame.
He said, "Don't you watch TV? ”
I felt as if I had suddenly been poked in the underbelly, and said timidly, "I don't think much of it... See also... Which channel? ”
He said, "Central One! ”
I seem to have made a big mistake and feel ashamed, the celebrities of the Central One have been traveling with you all the way, and they have been on the train together for many hours, and you don't know anyone, how disrespectful it is!
I don't really watch TV on a regular basis.
Usually, when I live in a hotel, the first thing I do when I walk into the room is that the TV turns on automatically; My habitual action is to shut down immediately. I wanted to complain that the hotel set up such a program is purely a rape of public opinion!
You deserve it, now it's time to make a fool of yourself!
I hurriedly asked, "Central One?" Which column? ”
He said, "Treasure." ”
I said, "Have I seen it?" I love this section. ”
He said: "I am an expert in treasure connoisseurship, and I have been sitting in the expert chair for five or six years. ”
I said, "I've seen so many issues, huh?" Why didn't I pay attention to you? ”
He said, "I'm here every issue! ”
I noticed a deep sense of loss on his face.
Later, I went to Baidu to search, and it was indeed him.
But, in good conscience, I really don't know him!
I wonder if this encounter will make him feel unlucky?
When he met me, he must have poured blood mold for eight lifetimes, and his inner feeling must be very unhappy! It's like Yi Yang Qianxi had dinner with me for the first time, and after introducing my name, I suddenly asked: Are you Japanese?
There is a concept in psychology called the spotlight effect, also known as the focus effect, which was proposed by psychologists Tylovich and Savisky.
Each of us tends to overestimate the level of attention that others pay to us, habitually think that we are the center of the world, and exaggerate our own importance, when others do not pay the same attention to us as we do.
To put it bluntly, we take ourselves too seriously!
There is a psychological experiment that was designed like this:
The researchers found a group of college students and asked them to wear sweatshirts with the words "American Eagle" emblazoned on their chests to social events. The researchers asked college students: How many people do you think will remember the words on your clothes? Most students believe that at least 40% of students will remember. But in fact, only 10% of people remember.
It can be seen that we care more about ourselves than others care about us!
However, we will be wishful thinking that others will also care about us as much as we care about ourselves.
The famous performing artist Ying Ruocheng told a story.
He grew up in a large family, and dozens of people sat together to eat every meal.
Once, on a whim, he decided to make a joke with everyone: before eating, he hid in a cabinet in the dining room, thinking to himself, if everyone can't find him during dinner, he must die in a hurry?
To his embarrassment, everyone didn't notice his absence in the slightest, and no one remembered him until he left after eating. At this time, he walked out alone.
Since then, he has told himself: never take himself too seriously, or he will be disappointed.
I can't help but think of an anecdote from George Bernard Shaw.
George Bernard Shaw, a famous British writer, once played with a little girl for a long time. When they parted, George Bernard Shaw said to the little girl: "Don't forget to go home and tell your mother that the person you are playing with today is the world-famous writer George Bernard Shaw." "
The little girl glanced at George Bernard Shaw and said in the tone of an adult: "Don't forget to go home and tell your mother that it is the little girl Anna who is playing with you today!" "
George Bernard Shaw was immediately ashamed of his arrogance, and said with emotion: "It was this little girl who taught me the best lesson of my life!" I will never forget this lesson for the rest of my life. ”
According to Catholic doctrine, there are "seven deadly sins" and the first is arrogance.
Ray Dalio, founder of Bridgewater Funds, said, "The greatest tragedy of mankind is arrogance and conceit! ”
Bill George, a leadership expert at Harvard University, writes in True North: "In ancient Greece and in modern Silicon Valley, there is only one thing that has brought corporations, societies, and civilizations to decline—arrogance." "
There is a sentence in "The Three-Body Problem" that says it well: "Ignorance and weakness are not obstacles to survival, arrogance is." "