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Two days ago, I read an incident on the Internet about "my mother went on a trip and was ridiculed by relatives", which caused anger, and I realized that some people love to be jealous, which is really ugly.
The blogger said that her parents hadn't traveled for several years because they were too busy at home to spare time.
And now, the blogger has also graduated for three years, and he doesn't have to worry about his parents, and his parents can finally find time to travel.
So, they signed up for a small group to travel to Yunnan.
In the process of traveling, her parents would share the scenery they encountered or the beautiful photos they took to the family group from time to time, wanting their relatives to take a look.
The family group, a total of more than 20 people, are all relatives of the blogger's grandmother, and the family atmosphere is usually good, and they often have dinners.
Then, the blogger took a look at the photos taken by his mother and found that his mother was smiling happily and his father's photo skills were also good.
As a result, when she was about to share the photo with her friends, her aunt suddenly became active in the group, and then what her aunt said made her feel very disappointed.
Her aunt said in a weird way:
"Can you take the sleeves off? It's ugly, like it just washed the dishes! Moreover, that backpack is not good-looking, it is very dirty! ”
At this time, the third aunt also smiled, and seemed to agree with her aunt's words.
Immediately afterwards, my uncle replied to my aunt:
"It's okay to look good, let you see people, not let you see the scenery!"
I thought my aunt would keep her mouth shut, but who knows, she still continued to mock unrelentingly:
"Fatty, fat, it really looks like a ball! Isn't the scenery always beautiful? However, people are different! ”
Seeing what his aunt said, the blogger was very angry, so angry that he didn't know what to say to his aunt back and forth, but he felt sorry for his mother.
Because my mother is the eldest sister, there are several younger sisters and a younger brother in the back, and the relationship between the family is usually good.
Maybe my mother thinks that her family is making a joke and there is no need to take it to heart, but the blogger just doesn't feel comfortable watching it.
My mother used to be in good shape, but after giving birth to a child, her figure couldn't return to its original state.
Then my mother also thought about losing weight, but because she had high blood pressure, my father didn't let me lose weight, so I didn't lose weight.
So, the blogger really hates the ruining of his aunt.
In fact, to put it bluntly, it's not that my aunt loves to spoil my fun, but that my aunt can't see others well, and she is jealous that others can travel, and she can only take the baby at home.
Jealousy often makes people unrecognizable, even if they are related by blood.
Keigo Higashino writes in his book "Malice":
"I hate you for realizing my ideals first, I hate your superior life, I hate you who I disdained so much at the beginning and now have a bright future, I hate my own cowardice, I hate my own lack of luck and talent. I give you all my hatred for myself, and I use it all to hate you. ”
The greatest evil of human nature is that it does not see the good of others. And those who can't see him better off are often the people closest to us.
Therefore, let's not overestimate the relationship with relatives, who are sometimes not even strangers.
一位作家说过这样的一句话：
"The darkest part of human nature is that the ones who really don't want you to live well are often the relatives around you."
There is a kind of relatives who would rather see outsiders as good than tolerate people around them being better than themselves.
People who are not related to each other succeed, they envy and worship, and the people around them are a little better off than themselves, and they are jealous and hateful.
The above incident reminds me of another thing.
There was a girl online who said that she hated her relatives at home, especially her uncle.
She and her uncle only see each other once a year, or when her mother left relatives during the Chinese New Year, she didn't want her mother to go back to her grandmother's house alone, so she chose to go back with her mother.
However, every year when they visited relatives during the Chinese New Year, their uncles would belittle her and her mother as useless, and then praise their own daughters to the top.
However, she herself is not bad, she scored more than 600 points in the college entrance examination and was successfully admitted to 985 and 211 schools.
And what about their daughters? I can't even get into the undergraduate line, so I can only go to an ordinary junior college.
However, every year when I go to relatives, I will be said by my uncle in a weird way:
"What's the use of you going to such a good school, you must be able to mix well when you come out? Now so many undergraduates and graduate students can't find jobs, and it's a waste of your mother's money to study...
It's not as good as your cousin's school, and the tuition for a year doesn't have to be so expensive, and if she can't find a job in the future, I'll arrange a good job for her. ”
In addition, although her mother is married far away, she also has a husband who knows how to love her and has an excellent daughter.
But in the eyes of these ugly relatives, her family is nothing, and every time she calls her parents by name and surname, without a trace of respect.
Therefore, the girl felt very sorry for her mother, but she did not dare to disrespect these elders.
In fact, when a person doesn't respect you, it's not that they don't know how to respect people, nor is they straightforward, it's just that they don't care about your parents from the bottom of their hearts, that's all.
This lack of care may stem from jealousy, contempt, or it may be their own problem.
remembers that Lu Yao described his relatives in "Ordinary World" like this:
"When we were children, we often saw how beautiful and important our "relatives" were. Once we have grown up and started to live independently, we quickly learn that kinship is often vulgar; Try to get the light on each other, and roll your eyes when you can't get it; Even the biggest difficulties in your life are often caused by your relatives; Life will also tell you that relatives are often not as sincere to you as friends. ”
That's true.
In this world, the person who dislikes you the most is never your enemy, not your downstairs, not your colleague, but the closest poor person around you.
越是亲近的穷人，往往越见不得你好，越容易给你使绊子。 In the eyes of these people, you can live well, but you can't live better than them.
Why are people around you more likely to be jealous of you?
First of all:
Similar living environments and resources lead to competition, and where there are people, competition will occur.
Because we all live in the same environment, the basic living conditions are similar, and your education, background, social class, job and even economic contacts are very similar.
Then, at this time, the competition will arise.
Even if you don't have a relationship in work or a branch in life, as long as you are on the same level, it is easy to cause jealousy.
Some relatives, on the surface, seem to be amiable, and when they ask you, they will do everything possible to please you, but in places you can't see, they have evil thoughts in their hearts, hoping that you will get worse and worse.
They would rather see outsiders better, better see people who are far away, than see people around them better than themselves, although this is heartbreaking, but it is true.
Reminds me of a story:
A woman in Jiangsu said that when her family moved to a new house, she specially invited her relatives to come over for dinner.
Then, her parents didn't ask them to bring anything valuable, as long as they had someone in place.
As a result, after eating, when her mother cleaned up the living room, she found several holes in the sofa that had been deeply burned by key marks and cigarette butts.
Later, after investigation and monitoring, it was found that it was the mother's two brothers who drew it.
Her mother said:
They must also be invited to move to a new house, but only for the sake of blood relationship. But they never thought that their hearts would be so vicious!
You see, some relatives with poor hearts are like this, the better you live, the more he doesn't want to see you doing well, even if you don't offend him.
As one writer put it:
"The darkest part of human nature is that the ones who really don't want you to live well are often the relatives around you."
A beggar is not jealous of a millionaire, but he is certainly jealous of a beggar with a higher income.
You never know how much malice people in your life who seem close to you will be behind your back.
Finally, I hope you can understand:
Relatives are originally gifts from God, and they should be confidants who are related to us by blood.
However, not all loved ones are worthy of our trust and dependence.
当面对一个见不得你好的亲戚时，我们不仅要与这些亲人保持一定的距离，不要过多地接触或者沟通之外，我们还要增强自己的自信和自尊，不要被这些亲人的言论或者行为所打击或者贬低。
Most of the disasters in life are not in poverty, but in the poor heart, people who can't see you are poor in heart, if you meet such relatives and friends, stay away as soon as possible!
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