When happiness knocks on your door, are you ready to greet it? If you haven't already, you might as well follow our footsteps and walk into "The Courage of Happiness" together, look up at the stars, and look down at your heart.
Everyone wants to be happy, but they don't know how to pursue it......
Charlie Munger once said in a speech that I was very fortunate to understand this truth at a very young age:
The surest way to get what you want is to make yourself worthy of it.
Undoubtedly, such a simple truth is Charlie's golden rule of becoming famous in the world and having a high-energy life.
In the book "The Courage to Be Happy", Adler tells us that you are worthy of all happiness.
But happiness doesn't come to your door, you have to take the initiative to find it.
You have to have enough courage to read yourself, choose actions, and locate your identity, so that you can control your life and be worthy of the happiness you want.
Read yourself and match your desires
Everyone wants to live happily. Ask yourself, what is the best happiness?
Some people say that happiness is your fault, and someone tolerates you; You are tired, and someone feels sorry for you; Happiness is not worrying about having no money in your pocket, someone is willing to give you money to spend at any time......
Some people say that happiness is the rich party, and some people say that happiness is living and working in peace and contentment;
Some people think that successful people who walk alone in the cloud must be the happiest, but some people think that being able to do what they like is the greatest happiness.
Look, there are so many on the shelves of happiness, which one will you choose?
Adler tells you to be calm, to identify your needs first, and then to match your desires.
Man must first read himself.
Hu Shenzhi, a well-known psychological counselor, once received a client, Ms. Y, who was experiencing emotional troubles.
Ms. Y loves her husband very much, but the two often have conflicts over gifts.
It turned out that every time her husband bought a gift for her, she would constantly find fault with it, either because the price was too high or because she disliked the quality.
The husband didn't know why, and the two got angry and quarreled, and the relationship deteriorated.
After a counselor peeling an onion, one day, Ms. Y finally realized that the deep reason for her pickiness was that she felt that she was not worthy of her husband's gift.
At that moment, she burst into tears and couldn't help herself.
Ms. Y reads her heart's desire, how much she wants to have a beautiful and intimate relationship, but subconsciously thinks that she is not worthy, so she will unconsciously do something to hurt herself and hurt her loved ones.
is in love, but always suffers from gains and losses, feels that he is not worthy of this happiness, and acts to make himself farther and farther away from his desire.
Seeing this, do you feel that you have been substituted, many people will be like this:
I was very sure of one thing, but I suddenly found out that I was wrong, began to question, and then peeled back layer by layer to see the truth.
The moment I really saw it, my heart suddenly opened up, but I couldn't help but be sad.
This sadness is sudden and compassionate.
will also give birth to a courage out of thin air, break free from the old shackles, and say goodbye to the past.
Once a person reads himself, understands his needs and desires, he will have a power of acceptance in his heart.
Spontaneously drive to find all the information that fits with one's desires, process and process, and match reality.
Only when the awakening is just right, can you be highly adapted to the happiness you want.
Because blind desire breeds greed. Greed is insatiable, and greed will be out of balance.
When the inner ability does not match the desire, it will not be worthy, and thus hatch the poison that harms oneself and others.
Only by reading oneself can one suddenly realize that only then can one match the inner consistency, can one deeply integrate into the present, bottom out, and give birth to endless courage to create substantial happiness and have one's own human worthiness.
Recognize actions and make proactive choices
Any success requires action. Action determines direction, and choice determines success or failure.
There is an American boy who has a lot of potential since he was a child. His parents wanted him to become a doctor.
But when the boy was in high school, he suddenly liked the computer, and he studied at home all day long. His parents were very worried and always advised him to study hard.
The boy had to follow his parents' wishes to enroll in medical school. But as soon as he finished the first semester, the boy insisted on dropping out.
Faced with an iron-hearted child, parents had to agree.
Later, the boy started a computer company and pushed the company to go public the following year.
Ten years later, the boy has $4.3 billion in assets, an achievement comparable to that of Bill Gates.
The boy was Michael Dell, president of Dell Inc. in the United States.
Think of little Dell, who fell madly into the computer with his initial love, and insisted on it alone despite his parents' dissuasion;
Later, he couldn't withstand the pressure of his parents to study in medical school for half a year, and dared to take the initiative to stop, dropped out of school to start a business to study his favorite computer, realized his life dream, and stood on the top.
You must know that when he took responsibility for his life without hesitation, he was just a young student.
Dreams are like seeds, and only when they land can they be valuable.
Dale made up his mind and acted boldly. I realized my big dreams and stayed away from the entanglements of life.
Before Dale could get into action, he received a lot of resistance from his parents.
Why was he able to cross this barrier on his own? Because he understands "separation of topics".
"Separation of issues" was proposed by Adler, who said that if people want to solve their interpersonal problems, they must distinguish between "my problems" and "other people's problems".
It was originally a messy subject, but once "oneself" and "others" were clearly distinguished, the boundaries were immediately clear and distinct.
The happy and confused facts of life are in many:
When you apply for college, you obviously want to study art, but your parents insist that you study a practical major;
There is a beloved object, but the parents strongly oppose it, and they must like it;
I want to focus on my career, but the person I talk to has not yet planned, but I didn't expect all kinds of marriage urging at home, and friends and colleagues around me are also concerned......
Let "separation of topics" be a panacea for your troubles.
Do your best what you like, dare to insist on your love, and do a good job of "your own subject", and "parental opposition" will become weaker;
Cherish the people you love and listen to the call of your heart, and the "love of your parents" will not be able to influence you;
Work hard, make yourself better, attract people you like, and the "marriage urging of others" will naturally disappear......
"Topic separation" allows you to reduce internal friction, keep your mind relaxed, and use the greatest strength to run into your own life.
Life is not easy, may you recognize the action, bravely insist on love; When encountering a tangled dilemma, then "separate the subject", break free from the shackles, take the initiative to choose, and act boldly.
Define your identity and take control of your life
Some people say that the secret to the pursuit of happiness is hidden in an accurate positioning identity.
Jin Weichun, who is known as the "No. 1 talent" in Taiwan's journalism industry, caused a sensation in the whole society when he wrote "There is Only One Thing in Life".
Jin Weichun's life story is very charming, in his early years, he served as the chief writer of the largest newspaper in Taiwan, China, and was at the peak of his life at the age of 30, but when he was hot, he suddenly chose to return to zero in life and studied business management in the United States;
At the age of 35, he returned to Taiwan to found "Business Week", but unfortunately encountered setbacks and fell into a deep business crisis.
Jin Weichun, who encountered the turbulent storm of life, repositioned himself, he chose to seek inward, learn to meditate and meditate, precipitate himself, and chew on the gains and losses of life alone.
After a profound positioning and heart-washing, Jin Weichun's dead heart became fresh again, and he chose to return to the magazine again, this time, he made a sober decision to develop the magazine into the most influential elite journal in Taiwan.
Why can Jin Weichun always overturn and start over and set sail against the wind?
Jin Weichun has done one thing well: positioning.
When he was young, he studied hard, went all out, and had a clear positioning; When he started his business, he became famous too quickly, and he positioned himself as "spoiled" to correct himself.
The ups and downs of life, the gains and losses of pampering and humiliation, Jin Weichun always knows how to look down, let go, and delight his heart, all because of his deep awareness and good positioning.
Coincidentally, Adler also had a great theory, he said, "What matters is not what is given, but how to use what is given".
Jin Weichun, who makes good use of "positioning" and can always adjust the main axis of life in a state of growth, uses "how to use what is given" to the extreme.
Whether it is wrestling with fate or saving himself from decline, he honestly accepts what he can't do, pinpoints what he can work on, and concentrates his firepower to attack beautifully.
Lao Tzu said: "Those who know others are wise, and those who know themselves are clear."
As long as you actively accept yourself, make good use of resources, inspire the courage to change, and put yourself in a state of "always wanting to progress", you can position yourself to gather energy, "throw" yourself into the track of life, accelerate progress, and constantly burst out wisdom and courage.
At different levels of life, there will be different scenery.
Live in the moment, perceive the moment, locate yourself; Constantly break the old self, transform and upgrade, control and control, and a wonderful life is defined by me.
After reading "The Courage to Happiness" several times, I finally understood that the happiness advocated by Adler has never been to indulge the senses and indulge in pleasure; It's not worry-free, it's lying flat.
It's about deep insight and constantly refining oneself inward; Break the old self, break the wrist and renew it, fresh and independent.
It is not easy to get it when it is recruited, but it is to be firm in the present moment and go deep into the bone marrow to do and understand.
Because true growth is self-reliance, and true happiness is the courage to cherish oneself and move upward.
"Just the Right Happiness" says, "I can't be sure when I'm going to die, but I can be sure that every day I'm alive and spend it with interest." ”
May you have the courage to be happy, no matter how life treats you, you must always live your own happiness equation!
Encourage your friends.