On October 27, 1937, the night of Liu Cuigang's martyrdom, Xu Xilin dreamed that he came home and brought her two beautiful white lamb skins and a wad of money.
Startled, she immediately let go, the dark money was scattered all over the ground, she sat up suddenly, her heart was beating suddenly, and her head was covered with cold sweat.
It took a while for her to calm down, and he comforted himself: It's okay, the old people say that dreams and reality are opposites.
She couldn't sleep anymore, thinking of the news of the death of Cuigang's friend, Liang Hongyun, the deputy leader of the 24th squadron, she was shocked and sad, and burst into tears.
Brother Hongyun is gone, what about tomorrow? What about the day after tomorrow? Who will go? Who will escape the catastrophe? What about Brother Hongyun's wife? One of their daughters has a posthumous son, who will raise them? Where are you, my beloved husband? You're not going to leave me, are you?
A few days later, the captain of the 5th Brigade, Ning Mingjie, suddenly came to visit Xilin at the residence, and Xilin told him that the sweater and woolen socks had been knitted, and if anyone went to the north, they should take them by the way. Captain Ning agreed, but he didn't dare to look at her, his eyes were flustered, and Xilin felt weird.
Recently, Du Qin, the wife of Wang Zuo, the unit commander who lives with her, has also spoken very strangely, always talking about the "soul" inexplicably, and sometimes asks her, will those officers and men of the Air Force who sacrificed their lives for the country get together in another world? Will they come back to visit their relatives and friends?
Xilin vaguely felt a bad omen, but she couldn't help herself not to think about it, she believed that her red warrior was skillful and daring, but why didn't she hear from her? She is in the midst of years and suffering.
More than half a month passed, and on November 14, the weather was already more humid and cold, Xilin was knitting a second sweater, and more than 10 people suddenly came to the house, it was his father Mr. Xu Linfu, and her aunt Ms. Li Yunxuan.
"Dad, auntie, it's so fierce outside now, you ...... How did it come? Xilin also saw several Air Force officers and Cuigang's comrades-in-arms.
"Xilin! He ...... "My father's voice was hoarse, and he was full of tears.
A thunderbolt on a sunny day, the last thing Xilin wanted to hear still happened, a heart-rending cry "My Pure Gang ......" and she was unconscious!
Xilin's father and aunt came from Hangzhou to mourn and brought three letters sent to Xilin's house after Cuigang arrived in Yangzhou.
Since Nanchang said, Cui Gang originally planned to let Xilin return to Hangzhou, but because the war in Shanghai had broken out, the traffic was cut off, and Xilin followed the army and his family to Jiangsu, so he did not see these letters.
Now, the family letter is in hand, but the person has passed away, seeing the words like faces, her tears are blurred, reading a paragraph and crying for a while, and then reading and crying again:
"Xilin:
I have written two letters before, and I think I have received them; Now I don't know if you are still staying in Nanchang or returning to Hangzhou, I miss it!
Recently, the situation has been very tense, and the Chinese nation is bound to resist to the end in order to survive; I was very busy at work, I was at the airport from 4 o'clock in the morning to 8 o'clock in the evening, although I was in some physical pain, but we were very happy mentally!
Remembering that we have been married for more than two years, you love me, forgive me in everything, you can understand everything about me, I am grateful, and I always feel ashamed of you; Xilin, I can't miss you for a moment, you encourage me to go forward and kill the enemy; Now I'm sure you don't miss me as much as the irrational don't miss me either.
We (the troops) may not be certain in the future, so I will wait or go to the north.
Because of my work, I'm afraid I can't write to you often, life is like morning dew, everything is like a dream, everything is unpredictable, if I am unlucky, then this is the last letter to you! …… Or maybe I will return triumphantly.
My Lin! My dearest Lin! Truly, if I sacrifice my life for the country, I will do my duty! Because I was born in modern China, we are not allowed to steal a moment!
You must always use your brilliant brain and reason, don't be stupid, don't sacrifice everything because of me, you know that people will laugh at you for being cowardly, and will never say that you are martyred!
You should create a new life and transform the environment, I only hope that you will always remember that you met me in the journey of life; My Lin, I love you forever!
We fight for justice! We fight for survival! We will win, we will not lose; My Lin! Don't worry, don't worry about me, the sky has eyes, the sky is fair, and I will take care of myself.
Wait quietly, my Lin, when we have recovered our lost territory and repelled the Japanese slaves, and that is when we will be reunited in victory: my dearest Lin, you wait quietly!
Cuigang August 12".
Xilin's father and aunt both knew that Xilin and Cuigang had a deep relationship, and they also understood Xilin's personality, and they followed her all the time, whether it was walking, eating, bathing, and even the gold and silver jewelry on her body were taken away to prevent her from eating and killing herself.
Xilin was determined to die after reading Cui Gang's "suicide note", and she took advantage of her family's unpreparedness to secretly save dozens of coins by taking advantage of the opportunity to go out to buy things to get back the change.
Late one night, she wrote on a note: "Pick me up, come and pick me up!"
Incinerated the note, Xilin poured a glass of water, and swallowed a bunch of one-dime and two-dime coins one by one like pills, and even swallowed 36 in a row.
Soon, she felt a tightness in her chest, and then fell unconscious and collapsed on the bed, but fortunately, her family found her in time and sent her to the hospital for first aid, and finally picked up her life.
Xilin, who died once, cried Cuigang: I really want to follow you! I want to tell you, I will never regret marrying you, I knew your life earlier, it was so short-lived, I should have accepted you earlier and accompanied you.
Alas, what kind of etiquette, and my little temperament, delayed your time with me, five or six seasons, and it was completely blank, and it made you so miserable at that time, I was such a bastard!
Xilin cried Cuigang: Actually, you have long been determined to die generously, but you don't want to hurt me, so you pretend to be relaxed and joke and say what you want to say.
That day, you looked at me stupidly: Wife, you are so considerate and gentle, you must be very happy to be your children. Wife, if I die, let me be your child!
I scolded you: what nonsense! Stupid to fly a plane? But you said, in your life, I will be your son, your next life, that is, my next life, we will be husband and wife again, it doesn't matter who is the husband and who is the wife. Actually, my heart is sour, I know what you're hinting at again!
Xilin cried until her tears dried up, and the corners of her eyes seemed to be flowing with dark red liquid, she stared blankly at the northwest direction, not moving for a long time, her elegant and beautiful appearance was already haggard, her eyes were scattered, and her hair was like a cloud of green silk, and a lot of it fell down.
--Bibliography "Sino-Japanese Air War", by Dai Kuixian
Anti-Japanese Air War [No. 52]
Liu Cuigang and his wife Xu Xilin
About the Author
Since I was a child, I liked words, and when I was a primary school student, I often used to do sample essays. During the literary youth, many articles won awards. After decades of wind and rain, his hobby has not changed, he likes to read literature and history, insists on writing, and welcomes exchanges.