What should I do if my child enters the "period of hatred" and rebels and speaks dirty? Three tricks for children to get through smoothly

The son of a distant relative, twelve years old, full of foul language, suddenly reluctant to go to school. Relatives did not call me for help. I know they're having the toughest problems with parenting right now, and of course it's the biggest headache for most parents. Let's take a look at my personal opinion according to my own understanding.

There are now many twelve- and thirteen-year-old children who have just entered the "adolescent rebellious period", which is what psychologists call the "hatred period". Once the child enters the "hate period", the behavior will change a lot, because the children in this period begin to show more and more of their egos, they find ways to do different things, say different words, let the parents identify with his existence, and some children will behave extremely rebellious.

However, parents must not panic or be helpless when encountering such a thing. It should be known that the "period of hatred" is an inevitable stage in the growth process of each child, but some performances are obvious, and some performances are not obvious. Every child is an individual, and there are early and late times to enter the "hate period". Studies have shown that children who enter the "hate period" early generally advance to about 11 years old, and late at 15 or 16 years old.

Children enter the "period of hatred", which is a hurdle in the parenting process for parents. Because children at this age are the most headache for parents, of course, this is also the most critical part of the child's growth process. If the child is well guided by the parents in the "hate period", the child will successfully pass through this dangerous period; if it is not handled well, things will develop in a worse and worse direction, resulting in the child becoming more hateful, rebellious, self-abandoned, and even ruin the child's life.

I have a fellow friend, because the parents divorced the child rebellion is serious, when I was in middle school, I often went out to play games in the middle of the night, and my mother looked for it day and night every day, and it was not easy to get to the college entrance examination, and the child went to college or trusted acquaintances to spend money on the kind of recruitment. Originally, I thought that I would learn better in the field, but I didn't expect that the Emperor of Heavenly Heights was far away from breaking my mother's heart. The child's mother was called to school three or four times by the teacher for less than a year, because the child was obsessed with online games and did not attend class, and the teacher tried to persuade the education to be impossible. Don't go to class, obsessed with games all day, borrow money from relatives and classmates when the money is spent, sell things when you can't borrow, once sold two mobile phones, and finally expelled from the school. It can be seen that if the child rebels and guides poorly, the consequences will be very serious!

There is no turning back for the growth of children, and parents who enter the "hate period" should not panic, let alone make a fuss. For such children, Wisdom Grandma suggests that parents may wish to try this:

1. Maintain the "parent-child relationship"

The biggest feature of the "children in the period of hatred" is rebellion, children in this period are like fleas on a touch, often make parents sad, provoke adults to be angry, parents must pay attention not to scold children in a lifetime, the parent-child relationship is too rigid; to know that once the parent-child relationship is rigid, the child will close the heart to the parents, and what to say is not willing to say to the parents, so that things can only make things worse and worse. Therefore, once the child enters the rebellious period, it is very important to maintain a harmonious parent-child relationship!

2, be patient with the child

The common feature of rebellious children is that you let him go east and he wants to go west, and some children don't even want to go to school. If you encounter this situation, parents can communicate more with their children, let them talk about what they like to do, and once the child talks about things that interest them, they will open the conversation box.

When the child is talking, parents should listen carefully, do not easily interrupt the child's thinking, even if the child says too outrageous, parents must be patient to listen, only by understanding the child's true thoughts can the right medicine.

Parents should learn to respect their children, especially their children's ideas. When parents feel that their children's ideas are too unrealistic, they can be guided by a pleasant face, telling their children that no matter what they learn and do, they can't do without knowledge; although people can live to be old and learn old, the golden period of people's life learning is only so short for nearly ten years, and once they miss it, they will regret it for life. When you say these words to your child, you can give familiar examples around you, so that your child knows that it is too late to regret once you lose the best time to learn.

3, the child says dirty words parents do this

Neighbors often complain that their sons speak in a foul-handed manner, sometimes even swearing at their parents. In fact, the reason why the child is so related to the neighbor himself. Neighbors open chess and card rooms, people in chess and card rooms talk casually, and neighbors are of course infected by them.

Parents are the child's first teacher, parents and children get along day and night, parents' words and deeds and every move have a great impact on children, children say dirty words Adults must first find reasons in themselves and overcome them. Although the child is twelve or thirteen years old, but the mind, or social experience is still lacking, sometimes the parent's mantra comes out of the child's mouth, the parents listen to it is very awkward, perhaps the child does not know that the words he said are dirty words.

Regardless of whether the child's swearing is influenced by the parents or influenced by others, when the child is found to be swearing, do not reprimand or open his mouth to scold. The best thing to do is that the child has just said that the parent repeats the child's words two or three times in a row, and when the child realizes that the parents are repeating his words, the parents will not say that the child feels embarrassed, and then he will self-control and slowly change it.

Don't be careful: you must not be tough on rebellious children!

In short, the love of parents for their children is selfless, the child is the crystallization of parental love, no matter what the child says and does, parents must not only adopt a forgiveness attitude, but also accept and double love for the child, so that the child truly feels that the relatives are amiable and the family is warm. Even if the child is indifferent to his relatives due to a momentary reversal, please believe that with the passage of time, the love of the parents will surely warm the child's "cold heart".