There is a saying: "A woman's emotions are determined by men, and a man's future is determined by women." ”
In a relationship, the husband and wife support each other and cooperate with each other to go further.
However, people always have higher expectations for women, hoping that she can take care of the family and prosper well.
There is a category of women who are not only prosperous, but also prosperous.
Their most striking trait is not just that they are thrifty and thrifty, but that they possess the following three characteristics.
Love your family, but also love yourself
The writer Oscar Wilde once said, "Loving yourself is the beginning of a lifelong romance." ”
Many women, before marriage, were sunny girls, and after marriage, they poured all their attention into their families.
Over time, she seems to have forgotten to love herself.
The neighbor Xiaomei, before she got married, was a young and beautiful little girl, and she dressed up beautifully every time she went out.
After getting married, Xiaomei seems to have changed as a different person.
She hurriedly washed her face every morning and plunged into the kitchen to prepare breakfast for her family.
After finishing breakfast, Xiaomei went to wake up the child.
The child struggled for a long time, refused to get up, and finally finished washing after tossing for more than half an hour.
Xiaomei asked her husband for help, but her husband said: "The child is too young, there is no need to be serious." ”
Xiaomei was very helpless, so she could only beckon her husband to sit down and eat first, after all, she was busy for a long time before preparing a large table of dishes for her family.
Her husband said, "My company has a lot of things, so I don't eat breakfast." ”
After dropping her children off at school, Mei returns home and starts cleaning up the kitchen.
When she was done and looked in the mirror, she saw her sallow and unkempt face, and couldn't help but reflect: "I seem to put all my energy on my husband and children, and I haven't loved myself seriously for a long time." ”
Thinking of this, Xiaomei dialed her best friend's phone, and the two made an appointment to cut their hair together and happily ate a hot pot.
When she returned home, she couldn't have been happier.
Xiaomei, who tasted the sweetness, began to consciously set aside some time for herself: reading books and doing yoga.
The whole person's spirit has improved a lot.
When her husband saw her changes, he began to unite with her in educating his children, and he became much more serious at work.
He quipped, "If you don't change, I feel like I won't be able to catch up with you one day." ”
Bi Shumin once said: "Only those who love themselves can truly love others without regrets." ”
Women, in particular, should put loving themselves first in order to have the strength and wisdom to love others.
Loving yourself is not just thinking about your own efforts, nor is it ignoring the feelings of your family.
To love yourself is to do what you love and allow yourself to shine.
When a person has attained inner abundance, she is the best feng shui for the other half, and she can not only prosper, but also harvest a new self.
Will do it, and will let go
Yishu once said: "As long as you are willing to let go, you can exchange for freedom." ”
For women, learning to let go of housework can not only give them freedom, but also allow their other half to harvest growth.
At the beginning, it doesn't really matter whether the other party does well or not, the important thing is that he is willing to participate.
In 1983, Uncle Li was introduced to Aunt Wang.
When the neighbors saw Aunt Wang, they praised one after another: "Not only is she beautiful, but she is also very virtuous and capable." ”
After the two got married, Uncle Li became the shopkeeper and did no housework.
Aunt Wang couldn't stand the mess at home, so she would clean the house inside and out every week.
It didn't take long for the two to have Dabao, who was born naughty and threw toys everywhere.
Aunt Wang had no choice but to follow her son's ass every day and clean up the battlefield.
At this time, Aunt Liu, a neighbor, kindly suggested to her: "Let Uncle Li participate in the housework." ”
At first, Uncle Li was very reluctant.
Under Aunt Wang's soft grinding and hard bubbles, he reluctantly agreed to do housework.
At the beginning, he was given the task of cleaning up the kitchen.
But after he washed it, he did it hastily, and even the grease stains on the side of the bowl were not cleaned.
Aunt Wang couldn't stand it and wanted to clean up, but was persuaded by Aunt Liu: "If you do it now, you will have to do it yourself in the future." ”
After thinking about it, Aunt Wang could only patiently explain to Uncle Li the common sense of cleaning up the housework.
In this way, after half a year of running-in, Aunt Wang completely learned to let go, and Uncle Li also learned to do it.
Both of them had income, and family life became much more harmonious.
There is a joke on the Internet: "No matter how high the mountain is, no matter how deep the water is, there is an end." If you have a big package, the housework is all on your shoulders. ”
Learn to let go, both hands in hand, and happiness will come to your heart.
Women in the family should not be a "silent giving, forbearance to contribute role".
Use wisdom to invite your partner to the chores and strengthen his sense of responsibility to the family in doing things.
Compared with hard work, learning to let go and let him grow up is a more prosperous choice.
There are measurements, and there are bottom lines
Speaker Li Yanjie once said: "Wise people are mostly generous people, and great wisdom is often proportional to generosity." ”
The measurement of women should not have a bottom line.
Don't worry about small things, but dare to show your principles at critical moments.
Sister Zhang and Brother Yu run a hardware store in the community.
On weekdays, when everyone needs help, both of them will be generous to help.
Brother Yu is busy and tired, and likes to get together with friends, everyone drinks and plays cards.
Brother Yu is righteous, and when his friends encounter difficulties, he often lends money with a wave of his hand.
It's easy to lend out, but it's hard to get it back.
Sister Zhang usually sees it, but she never cares about these things with him.
Suddenly, one day, the two had a quarrel in the store, and the neighbors came to persuade them.
It turned out that Brother Yu's brother failed to start a business and borrowed 20,000 yuan from him.
It was agreed that it would be returned after half a year, and there was no movement after a year.
Now his brother is calling and wants to borrow another 40,000 yuan.
As soon as he heard that his brother was in trouble, Brother Yu said that he would fund everything.
But Sister Zhang disagreed, she said calmly: "In small things, I don't care about you, but in big things, I have my own bottom line."
On weekdays, you can take a little money to help those friends, forget it, this is the tuition and living expenses I prepared for my children, you can't move! ”
Seeing that she was so determined, Brother Yu was embarrassed to take money to help this friend.
Brother Yu's friend didn't borrow the money, so he hung up the phone angrily.
The 20,000 yuan that was lent out at the beginning was not returned in the end.
After a long time, Brother Yu realized that Sister Zhang was reasonable.
He no longer interacts with friends who only know how to take advantage of him, and his family's happiness has improved a lot.
"Pride and Prejudice" wrote: "Feelings should be restrained by reason, and things must always be done in a measured manner." ”
A good woman is a tight spell on the other half, reminding him not to cross the line at critical moments.
She is measured, tolerant of people and things, and does not care about small things; She also has principles, has a bottom line for people and things, and does not back down at critical moments.
Because she knows very well that tolerance without a bottom line is actually connivance.
Only principled love can influence the other half to become a better version of yourself.
This will not only make the husband prosperous, but also make the whole family better.
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Sanmao once said: "Love is a kind of ability, the driving force, out of loving yourself first." ”
Girls should never forget to put love themselves first.
Only by loving yourself, daring to let go, and having a bottom line can you win the respect of others.
Only in this way, no matter who accompanies you, you can prosper yourself and your family.
Because you are the one who deserves to be loved, to be treated with care.
Author | Ziqiao Niyou Tiantian, a part-time worker in the workplace during the day and an independent writer at night, provides a certainty with words in an uncertain world!