"Between husband and wife, if you lose the three "desires", the marriage will not end"
The picture comes from the Internet
In the long journey of marriage, the emotional bond between husband and wife needs the support of many elements. When three of these "desires" are gradually lost, the foundation of the marriage may begin to falter and eventually come to an end. These three desires are: the desire to communicate, the desire to be intimate, and the desire to grow together.
Communication is the most critical bridge in the relationship between husband and wife. Once, Xiaofeng and Xiaomin were a model couple in the eyes of everyone. They met in college, and after graduation, they entered the palace of marriage hand in hand. However, as time went on, the stress of work and the trivialities of life gradually took over their lives. Xiaofeng works as a department manager in a company, and he is busy with various meetings and business development every day, and often comes home exhausted. Xiaomin teaches in a kindergarten, facing a group of active children during the day and taking care of household chores after work.
At first, they would also confide in each other about their worries at work and interesting things in life. But gradually, Xiaofeng feels that Xiaomin can't understand his deception in the mall, and Xiaomin thinks that Xiaofeng doesn't care enough about her hard work in kindergarten. Every exchange either ends in a quarrel or one party is indifferently silent. Eventually, they lost the desire to speak, and their home became unusually quiet. Xiaofeng would rather sit in the car for a while than go home early to face the embarrassment of having nothing to say; Xiaomin devotes more time to communicating with colleagues, looking for the understanding that is missing in the family.
The picture comes from the Internet
Intimacy is the direct expression of affection between husband and wife. Li Qiang and Wang Li have been married for many years, and their love was once full of passion and romance. However, as the years passed, the birth of children, financial pressures, and the monotony of life made the desire for intimacy between them gradually disappear. Li Qiang always refuses to have close contact with Wang Li under the pretext that he is tired from work; Wang Li neglected her own image and charm because she took care of her family and children.
The old affection has been replaced by indifference and alienation. They no longer walk hand in hand, no more affectionate hugs and sweet kisses. For countless nights, they slept back to back, seemingly separated by an invisible wall. This physical alienation gradually affected their psyche. They begin to doubt each other's feelings and question the meaning of marriage. Eventually, this once deep relationship became precarious in the absence of intimacy.
Growing together is an important guarantee for the long-term stability of marriage. In the early days of their marriage, Zhang Hui and Liu Mei both had common goals and ideals. Zhang Hui is determined to make achievements in his career, while Liu Mei hopes to show her talent in the field of art. However, as time passed, Zhang Hui suffered setbacks in his career, and since then he has been in a slump and has given up his pursuit and efforts. Liu Mei encouraged him to regain his strength many times, but Zhang Hui was indifferent.
Liu Mei continued to advance on the road of art, participated in various trainings and competitions, and gradually achieved certain achievements. But Zhang Hui not only did not feel proud of her, but was jealous and dissatisfied. The gap between them is getting wider and wider, and there are fewer and fewer topics in common. Liu Mei felt that Zhang Hui could no longer keep up with her pace, and Zhang Hui thought that Liu Mei was becoming more and more unfamiliar. In the end, they chose to go their separate ways because they couldn't work together on the road of life.
The picture comes from the Internet
From these examples, it can be seen that when the husband and wife lose the desire to communicate, the distance between the hearts and minds will become farther and farther apart; Without the desire for intimacy, the bond of affection will gradually break; If the desire to grow together is lost, each other's worlds will no longer intersect.
Marriage is not a one-and-done journey, but requires constant commitment and management from both spouses. Maintain the desire to communicate, so that each other's hearts are always connected, whether it is happy or sad, they can share with each other for the first time; Maintain intimate desire, convey love and warmth through physical contact, so that love is still alive in the baptism of the years; Have the desire to grow together, face the challenges and opportunities in life hand in hand, support and encourage each other, and make progress together on the road of life.
Only when both husband and wife cherish these three desires and strive to maintain and nurture them, can the marriage stand the test of time, be as strong as a rock in the wind and rain, and walk hand in hand through a long and beautiful life.
In real life, we often see some couples getting lost on the road of marriage. They may have loved each other at one time, but they have neglected the importance of these three desires, and their marriage has been in trouble. Some couples exhaust each other's patience in the quarrel and are no longer willing to sit down and communicate well, which eventually leads to deeper and deeper misunderstandings and relationship breakdown; Some couples lose their enthusiasm for each other in their ordinary lives, and no longer have intimate actions, making marriage cold and boring; There are also couples who are drifting apart on the road of life, one is constantly improving, the other is stagnant, and finally parting ways because the gap is too big.
The picture comes from the Internet
In fact, it is not difficult to maintain these three desires. The key is for both spouses to consciously pay attention and work on it. For example, take a little time every day to put down your phone and work, and share what you see and feel about the day with each other; Schedule a romantic date on a regular basis to relive the sweetness of being in love; Create a family goal together and then work towards it together.
In short, marriage is a practice that requires both husband and wife to manage it with their hearts. Only when we know how to cherish and care for the three desires of communication, intimacy and growing together, can our marriage be happy and long-lasting. Let us all work hand in hand with our lovers on the road of marriage to create a warm and harmonious future together.