In fact, the first thing many people who have broken up in a long-distance relationship always asks when they find me: We are in a different place, can we get it back?
I feel that many people imagine the remote location as the biggest difficulty in recovery, and then struggle with whether it should be or not, and whether to redeem it.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
Here I hope you understand that in the process of recovering a long-distance breakup, in fact, long-distance is really not the biggest problem, and many people, even if they are in the same city, can often go to see their ex, but they still do not succeed. Therefore, if you regard the distance as your biggest obstacle to recovery, it is actually a miscalculation brought to you by the continuation of your relationship.
To put it simply, you think that you broke up in a different place, so in the process of redemption, you feel particularly powerless in the face of the fact that you are in a different place.
So I hope you can understand that the real problem is not brought by a different place, but by your ability to deal with a different place, if you don't have the ability to recover, even if you are in the same office and can meet every day, you still can't save it.
Without further ado, I will share with you today a few issues that need to be avoided in recovering long-distance relationships.
The first is the question of your future planning;
It is important to emphasize here that many people do talk to each other about future plans, but they like to always want to impress each other when they talk about plans, and always tell each other how much they have sacrificed to complete our common future.
It's not a good habit, and everyone should get rid of it.
You may feel that you say that you have sacrificed a lot to accomplish your common future, and the other person will be moved. But in the eyes of the other party, this is a kind of pressure, and getting along with you with pressure will result in getting more and more tired.
In the relationship of a long-distance relationship, there must be a plan for the future, but what you want is your own plan, and at the same time, there is a other party in this plan, and it is not for the other party to sacrifice yourself, remember.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
The second is the end time of your long-distance relationship;
Let's take an example to illustrate:
Suppose your boss tells you that you just need to work hard and I will give you a salary increase in the future. How do you feel?
You must think that the boss is drawing pies, because he doesn't tell you what the specific day is, he just tells you the future, so you don't have much idea about this kind of pie.
But if he says that you only need to work hard for three days and your bonus will be credited, then you will definitely work harder for those three days, because you can see when your bonus will arrive.
The termination time of a long-distance relationship is similar to the time in this example, and if you don't give the other person the time to terminate your long-distance relationship, then you will bring disappointment to the other person.
The third is that you have to learn to communicate with each other.
We have found that couples in long-distance relationships are always prone to suspicion and cold violence, because couples in the same city can easily know each other's emotional changes, and the other party may simply frown, and you will know that the other party is unhappy.
But a long-distance couple is likely to be a cold text, and you can't even understand the meaning behind the other person's words, so it is likely that you will inadvertently ignore your partner's feelings.
Therefore, couples in long-distance relationships always think that the other party can accompany them more, and the companionship mentioned here is not only to stay by each other's side, but also to accurately perceive each other's emotions.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
Let's take a very simple example, let's say your partner has a cold, if you always told the other person to drink more hot water, then the other person will not feel the warmth, because you also do not feel the other person's desire to be accompanied at the moment.
In the face of this situation, you need to take practical actions, for example, buy medicine and send it to her, there is this kind of function on the food delivery software, you can definitely find it with your care.
In doing so, while taking care of the other party's emotions, it achieves the effect of empathy, so that the other party will feel that it is good to have you.
#前任##挽回##失恋#