Behind the anger are hidden emotions
You ask your brother why he would rather play games at home than go out to earn money, and he immediately lashes out and accuses you of having nothing to do.
Anger is just a façade, and underneath the anger is the inner shame that your brother wants to hide.
You ask your older baby why he'd rather throw away his toys than let his little brother play with them, and the older baby will yell at you.
Anger is just the surface, and under the anger is the grievance of the eldest baby's hidden heart for the unfair treatment of his younger brother that his parents always ask him to humble.
If you ask your parents why they are always so partial, your parents don't reflect, they just angrily scold you for not being grateful.
Anger is just a symptom, and underneath that anger is the fear that parents hide that they know you see the truth and that they will no longer be able to manipulate you.
Behind the behavior is an unmet need
Some people are particularly friendly to outsiders, responsive to others' requests, commonly known as good old people, and they will put away their aggression regardless of whether others are well-intentioned or malicious.
That's because they often lack the ability to self-recognize due to low self-esteem, so they have a strong inner need to be recognized by the outside world, and they can only live in the evaluation system of others.
Some people have a good time with you, but they never reach out to you.
That's because they have an avoidant attachment personality, they fear not getting a response after reaching out to you, and what they experienced in their childhood makes them distrust any relationship.
Some people are particularly fond of explaining themselves, both in their relationship and at work, for fear that others will misunderstand them.
That's because they lived in an environment where they were blamed by their parents for a little thing when they were young, and they didn't have the opportunity to explain for themselves when they were young, so they formed a defense mechanism that liked to explain.
Conduct a self-examination from your behavior
You see, it turns out that the result is just a phenomenon and not a root cause, and you have to look at the different behaviors and trace the root cause.
This will allow you to understand that others are angry not because of you, but because of their own problems.
This allows you to self-examine from your own behavior and understand yourself better.
You can start with the behaviors you are most accustomed to and ask yourself why they are the way they are, what motivates you to take on challenges, and what fears keep you from moving forward.
Get to the root of the problem and meet the need
Only when you get to the root of the problem can you better meet your truest needs.
These are the most real needs, and most of the time, you can't rely on others to help you.
Because others may not even know themselves, how can they accurately locate your needs and meet your needs?
The best way is to observe and awaken yourself, and when you discover the unnoticed subconscious, your destiny can be easily controlled by yourself.
At that time, you were no longer a puppet at the mercy of others, but a self-aware person at the helm of your own destiny.