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Can you imagine?
In Beijing, a city with little land, you can live like a celebrity for 21 days without spending a penny?
It sounds like a fantasy, but some time ago, a female college student from the Central Academy of Fine Arts turned it into reality.
She is Zou Yaqi.
In order to complete his graduation project, Zou Yaqi successfully completed the challenge by pretending to be a celebrity.
In these 21 days, with a high-imitation Hermès bag, a fake diamond ring of 18 yuan, and exquisite and decent makeup, she mixed into the first-class lounge of the airport, ate a free buffet, and slept on a high-end red velvet sofa;
He also entered the auction venue, tried on jewelry worth tens of millions of dollars, and tasted the high-grade chocolates and foie gras snacks provided by the venue;
Even generously appeared in a five-star hotel, enjoying the treatment of free bathing and sauna...
Among them, there is also a security guard brother who mistakenly thinks that she is a rich woman from somewhere, and he is attentive to her and cares for her.
When Zou Yaqi posted the 21-day experience online, it caused a lot of controversy.
Some people ridicule her as "a real celebrity dressed as a fake celebrity", can afford to go to art school, and the level of understanding of high-end places is enough to show that she is originally a famous woman, in the final analysis, this is just a game for rich people to experience life.
But in a subsequent interview, Zou Yaqi revealed that he had been preparing for this experiment for half a year and had done a lot of strategies.
For example, where there are free clothes, where there are free places to live, which places have free food, and what modes of transport I can use:
"I am not a celebrity, I am a proletariat. Looks like a celebrity, purely a long time of preparation and superb acting skills. ”
In fact, Zou Yaqi's success just proves that a good "self-design" can help us have the courage to fight swords and rivers and move forward in life.
Especially in relationships.
Fill the world with good intentions
It is to believe in psychological cues of oneself
Weibo big V@ Miss Wild Elephant came to see the flowers to share a view of "psychological cues and empathy".
That is, people will paint a portrait of themselves in their minds, that is, "self-design", when you imagine yourself as what you are and suggest that you do that, inadvertently, you will become what you want to be.
She also gives a few examples:
For example, Emperor Gong has the temperament of an empress, because she really feels that she is an empress in her heart, and her works can stand up and her self-confidence can also support her;
Why Xu Qing didn't grow up, stemming from the shy, arrogant, and strange look on her face, she felt that she should have a lot of boys at the age of 100.
Psychology believes that suggestion is the simplest and most typical human conditioning.
In terms of psychological mechanism, it is an assumption affirmed by the subjective will, which is not necessarily based on evidence, but because its existence has been subjectively affirmed, the mind strives to move towards this point.
In the movie "The Queen's Journey", the heroine Laney is an introverted and inferior and boring girl at the beginning.
The fiancé felt that she had no attraction in her, so he dumped her when she was about to be married, and no matter how hard Laney pleaded, he could not change the fate of the breakup in the end.
Sad, Laney chose to go alone to Paris, where she was supposed to go on her honeymoon.
It was during this trip that Laney completely unleashed herself, pretending to be happy, free, and funny.
From the initial restraint and twisting, to the later fall of generosity, as if she was born like this.
As a result, such a Laney not only attracted a group of enthusiastic friends, even if they encountered difficulties, they would get help, and even the ex-boyfriend who repented of marriage regretted it and hoped to reconcile with her.
Russell said:
"A person's face is the outward expression of a person's value. It hides not only your life, but also the life you are pursuing. ”
When your face is full of confidence and determination, even if you have no money in your pocket, the world will be full of kindness to you.
And this kind of self-confidence can be acquired.
Once people are loyal to "human design"
There is a unique power
In the Japanese drama "The Courage to Be Hated", it is said: "The reason why people have been unable to change is because they have long determined that they cannot change, because even if there are unsatisfactory things in daily life, it is easier and more reassuring to maintain the status quo." ”
This is also an excuse for many people to deceive themselves when they are in a low point.
"Forget it, people have to be self-aware."
How can you have the courage and motivation to change when you set limits on your life at the beginning?
A fan backstage once shared his story with us.
Although she and her husband know each other on a blind date, their relationship has always been very good. And her husband's conditions are very good, graduated from a prestigious university, and has a high-paying job.
But later, her husband changed, perhaps because it was difficult to restore the aura of the past, coupled with no sense of participation in the family, she had been shaking her hands and looking for excitement when she was pregnant with her second child, and chose to cheat.
But at that time, she did not have the ability to divorce.
"I gave birth to my second child and became very fat, and the whole person was very unconfident.
Moreover, I boiled frogs in warm water for several years in a unit with extremely low wages and could not learn anything, and I had no competitiveness at all, and I wanted to jump ship, and people around me were also advising me to forget it.
If divorced, I don't look good and have no ability, so I can only swallow my breath and turn a blind eye. Not only my husband, but also my parents, even myself, will feel useless. ”
If she continues like this, she will repeatedly fall into such emotional attrition.
The turnaround appeared in the video she swiped one day.
It was a TV series cut of "Zhenggong Hand Tearing Little Three", when she saw Lin Pinru "resurrected" as Gao Shanshan, became a celebrity of high society, and successfully punched the scumbag boy Xiao San, a thought suddenly appeared in her mind:
"Why can't I be Gao Shanshan as well?"
So, she worked hard to lose weight and enrolled herself in yoga and swimming lessons.
Whenever she can't hold on, she will constantly give herself psychological hints, imagining that she is the heroine.
In the end, she not only successfully lost weight, but also successfully went ashore and saw a lot of interesting people and things.
What is more interesting is that because of her transformation, her husband also has a sense of crisis, not only breaking off contact with the third party outside, but also going to the gym with her, focusing on the family.
We're not going towards human design
It's about going to the self
Read a sentence:
"What matters is not how to change others, but how we should live in such a world, how we should put ourselves in our place, how we define ourselves, how we hold on to our inner beliefs."
In a world that you can't control, the real way to live happily and attain liberation is to agree with yourself. ”
So, what exactly are we going to do?
1. Positive psychological cues
Sean Belloc makes this point in his book Embodied Cognition:
Many physical movements send signals to the brain, which affects our mental state. For example, if a person's posture is more stretched and powerful, then he may also feel powerful and more confident from the heart.
So, instead of drilling in place, try to give yourself some positive cues, some beautiful imaginations, and then put them into action.
Pretend you're OK until you really do.
2. Be aware of your true needs
Good personalities are based on an understanding of themselves, and need to be formed spontaneously, rather than having a "utilitarian nature" to cater to others.
This means that your personality is your true self, not your own life in the eyes of others.
Because you're going to go to the self, not to the person.
Finally, I hope that every woman can live for herself, not be coerced by others, never give up growth, bloom bravely, and live out of herself.