Every day there are unsatisfactory things, which are not things that are not there or not, but things that are more or less.
On the first day of the May Day holiday, I went to visit the elderly, but I was troubled by my mother's bad mood for a while. Dad has been dreaming a lot lately, feeling very uncomfortable, getting up in the morning to make the bed, the mother thinks it is deliberately tossed, the mood is bad and intense, preventing the babysitter from helping.
Listen to the mother talk about their old sisters upset the past, listen to more and not much to say, this thing is said, my explanation is: 1, help others more, show that we live better, stronger than others, 2, Dou Mien sheng rice revenge, unless the parent-child relationship is like brothers and sisters, get more will also become adaptable, over time to pay more psychological imbalance, 3, look more at the memories of positive things in the past, and how to come through such a difficult day.
Psychology is subjective, and so are my views, doomed to be useless nonsense, unable to actively accompany, only to talk better than nothing.
Also surprised, knowing that I had brought the sheets for my father, my mother was angry, and when I took it to the bunk, she was in a wheelchair and angrily threw her own teacup towel and said something unpleasant, which was a rare scene. You know, it was my mother who told me last time that my father wanted to change a sheet, and before I had time to buy a new one, I took this almost unused.
I had to silently pick up my mother's belongings, put them away, and then accompany me helplessly to say something good. Originally a good thing, done like this, very depressed, and even once wondered whether to not give the father this sheet first, and then put it on the bed for the nanny to change.
For this matter, I can quite understand my mother's fierce emotions. First, due to physical diseases such as stroke, it is very easy to cause emotional depression, remember that I was very anxious at the time, and I took my mother to see a doctor, and the advice is that this disease is easy to cause depression.
Moreover, it should be expected that the children will accompany them more and talk and communicate more, but they will expect more disappointment, and even the more children, the more they will expect more disappointment.
Pension things look similar, all live a similar life, but the family is different, the individual differences are large, and the taste experience in it cannot be clear to non-experiencers. For example, let's not talk about the quality of accompanying the elderly, just how often to visit, how much time to stay around, how much to say and do more things, these can be specifically measured and estimated, how much can be done, especially when you work and family a group of things.
To this end, there is a third point, companionship can only be companionship, can not replace a person's life, whether this person is their own parents or children. In the same way, psychological feelings can only be digested by our own taste, we can not really empathize with others, can not fully understand others, can only do their best, in turn, we must accept the conviction that no one can empathize with me. Therefore, we must do what we think we should do, and what we can do, but also accept what we are unable to do, and what we may have to refuse helplessly.
The road of life is doomed to suffering; the road of life is destined to be walked alone. As a companion, it may not be easy to do not seek understanding but to accept and respect this person, as it is, to do your best, and to try to feel this is the road that few people have traveled.