Wenchang Book Club No. 75
Valuable/not impulsive
Imagine that there are two worlds, one world has you, one world does not have you, so that the gap between the two worlds is the largest, that is the meaning of your life.
If you're in a painting, you're caught up in it; if you're like a person looking at a painting outside, you can stay sane and see the big picture.
01How to become a more valuable person?
Money is not a measure
Some people think that the richer people are, the more valuable they are, but money is actually a very bad reference in the process of becoming more valuable.
In July 2008, Bill Gates, the world's richest man who had been the richest man in the world for many years, still resigned all microsoft positions to do charity, just because making money could not meet his value pursuit.
Anchoring effect: Refers to an anchor-like thing, an idea, which will become your standard for judging everything.
Narrow frame effect: When the frame is very narrow, you are in the frame and you don't actually see the whole picture of the world.
Five steps to operating time
The essence of life is a period of time, and only by operating a good time can we become more valuable.
First order: Anchor time. Continuous learning, improve yourself, use time enough, use well, so that the same time to produce more value.
The second order: multiple returns. Diversify the benefits generated over the same period of time as much as possible and improve them in all aspects.
Third order: copy time. In the way of writing and speaking, give time to do multiplication, one pay, multiple gains.
The fourth order: create expectations. Create stable expectations of others for themselves, so that future time will produce value in the present. Be a reliable person: everything has an echo, everything has a fall, and everything has an explanation.
Fifth Order: Purchase time. Create value for yourself by buying other people's time. The premise is that you must learn to trust others.
The most precious thing about a person is life, and everyone's life is only once, so you should spend your life like this: when you look back on the past, you will neither regret your wasted years nor be ashamed of your inaction. - "How Steel is Made"
02 How to become a person who is not impulsive?
Control the nature of emotions
Human evolution has eliminated those who are crazy and impulsive all the way, you don't manage your emotions, there is always someone to manage your emotions for you.
Today, in this information-packed world, many things are missing the stop button. The news that is always refreshing, the video that can never be slid, the window that is always beating, are all invisibly consuming your time.
The first response that manages our emotions is the amygdala in the brain, and the cerebral cortex, which wants to drive you to make some more rational, more logical judgments, turns out to be the amygdala winning. So the essence of managing emotions is to manage the amygdala.
Five weapons to manage emotions
Set boundaries: In this day and age to manage our own emotional impulses, we often need outside help to set ourselves an end alarm clock.
Slow down: When we are ready to get angry, first describe why we are angry, the current state, and when you are finished, the fire will basically disappear.
Increase the burden: Let the rational side of the brain work, increase the burden of thinking, and weaken the emotional response.
Objectification: Look in the mirror when you are about to get angry, jump out of the picture and look at yourself, and you will get an extremely rational perspective.
Amplification scale: A small annoyance placed in such a large spatial scale is a speck of dust.