Good things come in pairs (anecdotal anecdotes)

(Wang Jinger)

In the early years of the Republic of China, there was a man named Silly San in Xiushui Hutong in Baoding Province, who was a bit lacking in heart and eye, and made a living by doing odd jobs. Not far from the Silly Three Family, it is the Hou Four Family. Hou Si can be described as the ground snake of Xiushui Hutong, and he worshiped the nursing home of Cao Kun's presidential palace at that time.

On this day, as soon as Silly Third left the house, he was stopped by Hou Si: "Third son, you work odd jobs every day, when can you marry your daughter-in-law?" Let's do something else. It just so happens that my family has charcoal, a piece of ocean is sold to you, you sell charcoal, make some money to do some small business. ”

Silly Sanlian nodded, and came to Hou Si's house to see that it was actually a charred beam. Silly Three remembered that more than a month ago, hou sijia had lost fire. Hou Si saw that Silly Three was a little remorseful, so he blew up the bull, and finally said Silly Three happily bought this charred beam.

From this day on, Silly carried this charred beam for three days and stood next to a shouyi shop in Xiushui Hutong to sell it, which caused people to laugh at it. But Silly Three didn't care, or every day.

On this day, Hou Si heard about the stupid thing about Silly Three selling charcoal, and he also came, and he laughed so much that the golden teeth in his mouth were about to fall off, and in the blink of an eye, bad water came out again. He walked over and patted Silly San's shoulder and said, "Third son, the charcoal is sold in small pieces." The reason why I sold you a piece of the ocean is because I didn't split it. And charcoal is good to burn, people have no score in their hearts, after you split, you should burn while selling, so that is the way to sell charcoal. ”

Silly Three was really obedient, and the next day he split the beams into small pieces, burning and drinking. People are even happier, where in the world is such a stupid master, a piece was not sold, but several pieces were burned in vain.

Silly Three burned and sold while selling, the owner of the shouyi shop next to him did not dry, in case of a fire, it hurt himself, so he ran out to stop it.

Silly Trinity craned his neck and said, "I didn't block the door of your store, why don't you let me sell?" ”

The boss said, "Who won't let you sell?" I mean don't burn charcoal, in case the fire goes and burns my shop, can you afford it? ”

Silly Three said, "I'm being careful." Besides, this is the method that Fourth Brother Hou gave me, and I listened to Fourth Brother Hou. ”

The boss did not say a word, it turned out that after the Fire of Hou Si's family, almost all the traders in Xiushui Hutong gave gifts to Hou Si, and because he was sick in those few days, he did not care about this matter, could it be... Thinking of this, the boss immediately changed his face and said: "Third son, my family is short of charcoal, you can make a price." ”

Silly Third said, "I bought a piece of the ocean from Brother Hou, and I struggled to chop it in the middle of the night... Two oceans? ”

The boss didn't say a word and pulled out two pieces of ocean. After selling the charcoal, Silly Three ran to Hou Si's house and told Hou Si the news, saying, "Brother Hou Si, I have earned a piece of ocean, what should I do next?" I listen to you. ”

Hou Si was shocked and surprised, and when he heard that Silly Three actually had two oceans, his greed immediately arose, and he said, "Third Son, do you know who is the richest in baoding province?" ”

Silly Three shook his head. Hou Si said, "O foreigner! What do foreigners like? ”

Silly Three still shook his head. Hou Si said: "Chinese antiques! It just so happens that my family has a night pot used by Qianlong Ye. It's just that over the years, there is a crack. Seeing that you believe in brother so much, brother will complete you, and two oceans will be sold to you. ”

Silly Three immediately paid for it and took away the "night pot that Qianlong Ye used." Hou Si laughed so hard that tears came out, what Qianlong Ye used the night pot, I used. I broke it a few days ago and I want to throw it away. This is good, and sold two more oceans.

Speaking of silly three, he turned the day to hold this night pot to Xiushui Hutong, ripped open his throat and shouted: "Qianlong Ye used the night pot, three oceans, who bought it?" ”

People gathered around, and after reading it, they all laughed to death, and no one paid attention to the stupid three. For several days, Silly Sanzhen was persistent, selling "night pots used by Qianlong Ye" every day.

On this day, Silly Three was shouting loudly to sell it, a foreigner came over, picked up the night pot and looked left and right for half a day, then said that it was half a day, and finally took out three pieces of ocean, handed it to Silly Three, and held the night pot and left.

At this moment, the entire Xiushui Hutong shook. Silly Third was even more elated, trotting all the way to Hou Si's house, after finishing the experience, he took out the three pieces of ocean and said, "Fourth Brother Hou, you say, what should I do next?" ”

Hou Si was the same as listening to the Heavenly Book, until Silly Three pulled out the ocean and eased up. Oh my God, what kind of luck is this stupid three bumps? Well, since you fat pig arch, if I put down the butcher knife, I'm stupid. So he rolled his eyes and said, "Well, that brother will show you another way to make money." You, don't do business, go to the army. ”

"Soldier?" Silly Three blinked and said, "Why? ”

Hou Si said: "In this world today, it is better to have money than to have power, and it is better to have power than to have soldiers. Now President Cao Kun is recruiting for a horse. You can even earn the money of foreigners, and you will definitely be favored by President Cao Kunda, and then you will have nothing to do with glory and wealth. However, this requires a bit of dotting. My righteous brother worked as a nursing home in Cao Kun Province. So, it only takes six oceans to do this. ”

Silly Third frowned bitterly and said, "Fourth Brother Hou, I only have these three oceans." Otherwise, I'll write you an IOU, and when I'm a soldier, I'll give you the money. ”

Hou Siqiang suppressed a smile and said, "Well said, who let me be my brother?" ”

A few days later, Silly Sanzhen became a soldier. However, as a soldier under Cao Kun, the military salary was not received once. Silly three don't care, anyway, there is food and drink. But others did not do it, they had long held their breath, and cursed Cao Kun one after another, in order to be the president, when you canvassed for votes, you had money, but you had no money to pay the military, so a company commander took the lead and wanted to secretly assassinate Cao Kun. The method was to bombard Cao Kun Mansion with cannons, Baoding Guangyuan. It just so happened that Silly Three was the soldier under the company commander. Since the three fools were stupid and wanted to summon them, the company commander arranged for the silly three to be the loaders.

After Silly Three learned that he was going to blow up Cao Kun, he immediately stopped drying. Hou Si said that he would be favored by Cao Kun, but now he wants to kill Cao Kun, so won't my glory and wealth be ruined? However, he was very afraid of the company commander, so on the night before the shelling of the presidential palace, he ran to Hou Si's house and told Hou Si about it.

Hou Si's face turned white, and he hurriedly pulled Silly Three to see his righteous brother. Therefore, Cao Kun knew about this and hurriedly left the Guangyuan Garden. As soon as the front foot left, there was an explosion on the back foot. It turned out that after the company commander learned that Silly Three was missing, he felt that things were not good and fired a cannon in advance.

Cao Kun narrowly escaped this fate and immediately sent someone to capture all the participants. After handling this matter, Cao Kun discussed the merits and rewards, and personally received Silly Third, Hou Fourth and others. It was really Wang Ba who looked at the green beans, and Cao Kun liked Silly Three at a glance, even if he left Silly Three by his side. Why? Before Cao Kun was founded, he was once known as: Cao San fool. This can also be regarded as "heroes cherish heroes".

Silly San ascended to heaven one step at a time, naturally he could not forget Hou Si, and he said good things for Hou Si in front of Cao Kun. Cao Kun was moved and asked Hou Si, "Say, what reward do you want?" ”

Hou Si was more refined, and he made a generous confession, but he did not want to be rewarded. Cao Kun was greatly moved, and even called out "the wind of the national soldier", and finally waved his hand and said: "Since you don't want it, then if I give it strongly, it seems that there is a gentleman's wind..." Speaking of this, he frowned.

Hou Si scolded in his heart: I am just modest, you really don't give rewards? No wonder you're blown up. But the mouth is still passionate: "It is my unshirkable duty and supreme honor to serve the president with some modest efforts, and the president does not have to worry about this trivial matter." In the heart of the president, it should be filled with the people of the country and the people of the world. ”

Cao Kun nodded and said, "Well said! Just because I have in my heart the people of jiangshan and the people of the world, I have decided to reward you with something of great significance. With that, he made a night pot. Silly Three and Hou Si were dumbfounded when they looked at it, this was exactly the night pot that Silly Three sold to foreigners.

It turned out that foreigners bought a night pot in Xiushui Hutong, which actually became the news that shook Baoding Province. All kinds of "shocking news" flew all over the sky: what night pot was used by Qianlong and was a priceless treasure; what foreigners bought night pots with ulterior motives; what night pots were engraved with dragon vein maps, and once the night pots were transported away by foreigners, they were destroyed by the country... In short, the more it spread, the more evil it became, and finally it reached Cao Kun's ears.

Out of curiosity, Cao Kun asked his men to pretend to be merchants and find the foreigner, one to find out, and the other to see if they could buy it back. As a result, the foreigners sold it cleanly for five oceans. As for why I wanted to buy it at that time, the foreigner said: "It looks fun, especially the Chinese who sells night pots, it is more fun, and I bought it from a moment of sexuality." ”

After Cao Kun knew, he was annoyed, wasn't he full of food? But if you throw it away, you feel that you have lost face, so you have to let people put it away first, lying that there is another use.

Now, it really comes in handy. But where did Cao Kun know that the two people in front of him were the initiators of the Night Kettle Incident. In order to show his solemnity, Cao Kun put his face on the face and said: "This night pot was used by the Qianlong Emperor in that year, which is called a national treasure, but it was stolen by foreigners." I only chased it back half a month ago, with one purpose: I must not exile my Chinese things to other countries. Now, I solemnly reward you with this night pot, quan when I Cao Mou to the people of the world, to show his heart: bow down to exhaustion, after death, even if it is a night pot, you must keep it! ”

Hou Si took the night pot, crying and laughing, and was not sure how to answer it, but Silly Three suddenly cried out: "It is the night pot that Qianlong Ye used, I didn't expect that it has also been used by the President now, this is really ... What a good thing to be in pairs! Fourth Brother Hou, congratulations! ”