Life is uncertain, we need to go through a lot of hardships and hardships to get a career for ourselves and build a stable family.
And the contradictions between family members, if the mentality can not be corrected, it is easy to make the solid relationship that has been built up over the years fall apart in an instant because of a small emotion and interest.
When we are middle-aged, the experience of restructuring a family involves too much, although the trivialities in the family are worrying, and there are small burdens on the old and the young that make people breathless, but we still have to stick to our responsibilities, rather than venting our emotions arbitrarily.
Emotions evaporate, and you get a momentary happiness, and the price you pay is much greater than you think, and you will even be in an irreparable situation.
In the real society, human relations are wrapped in interests. Who can really think about you, in the final analysis, is still the family that is involved with you and constantly cuts.
But many times our mutual harm often starts with family. This is the internal friction of life, it will make you unhappy, and it is also the root of a family's heart and fragmentation.
If the relatives are not harmonious, the blessings are damaged. If you want your family to prosper, you have to be angry more than temperate.
Sun Qifeng, a master of science, once said: "The prosperity and decline of family fortunes, the heavens cannot exercise their power, but they are self-controlled." ”
Simply put, the rise and fall of a family is not predestined by nature, but is determined by the members of the family themselves.
If there is a harmonious and stable relationship between family members, rather than family friction, then the family is happy, happy and responsible.
Poverty in a family is not terrible, as long as the family can work together, there will always be a day out of the trough. What is really terrible is the internal friction in the family, the family discord, the husband and wife discord.
We live in this world, itself is already very difficult, if the family is not able to unite with the outside world, then this feeling of "belly and back" is easy to make people abandon themselves and be injured all over the body.
Such a family is like a seemingly leafy tree, but in fact, the interior of the middle has been eaten by termites and has lost its stable foundation.
What we need to know is that any seemingly indestructible fortress will eventually be breached from the inside and collapsed from the inside. Family, no exception.
The "Yan Family Training" has a saying: "If the father is not kind, the son is not filial, the brother is not friendly, the brother is not respectful, and if the husband is not righteous, the woman is not smooth." ”
The internal friction of many families is related to the competition for interests, mutual comparison and even denigration. For example:
Families of several brothers and sisters compete with each other for the inherent resources of the family, and it is easy to turn against each other; or one party is very different from the other, and it is easy to cause a chain of contempt in the family and affect the relationship between each other. Thus, the "nest fight" was born.
Moreover, as the concept of human feelings in the contemporary environment becomes more and more thin, people's hearts become more and more impetuous, lacking the warmth they should have, and selfishness and impetuosity are the beginning of family internal friction.
The contradictions with the parents' old and new concepts, the disputes with the lovers' different views, and the generation gap that children are increasingly generating are all external manifestations of internal friction.
Why do middle-aged people feel more and more stressed now, while young people dare not get married and are unwilling to enter into marriage?
Perhaps the source of these two problems is "family", and it is precisely because there are too many contradictions that may arise between families, and there are too many things that need to be taken into account when interacting with people, which will make people become anxious and even afraid to retreat.
We all say that family affection is a broken bone and a tendon, but mutual harm between relatives is the fastest way to consume family affection. Failure to communicate and understand each other can only accelerate the collapse of the family.
Because of the entanglement of feelings and blood, the family is a place where "contradictions" gather, and if you want to keep a distance without disputes, you can only become strangers, but the result of such a vicious circle is ultimately at the cost of reducing your quality of life.
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The world is so big, thank you, you can see me!
[Wen | Wei Wei'an: the pen has temperature, for the voice of emotion, an atypical writer who loves words, invites you to perceive life together]