Once when I went to the train station, my mobile phone was lost, and my resourceful daughter-in-law immediately sent me a text message with her own mobile phone, saying: "Husband, why have you been in the toilet for so long

Once I went to the train station, my mobile phone was lost, and my resourceful daughter-in-law immediately sent me a text message with her own mobile phone, saying: "Husband, why have you been in the toilet for so long, why don't you answer the phone?" When I got to the point, I left first, I deposited the 20,000 yuan given to my mother to the station storage office, box 186, the password is 1685, see you at home Ha!" So, half an hour later, we caught the thief at the storage office!

2. The company owner's two-hundred-pound daughter has recently fallen in love with wearing costumes and has to buy a lot of money every day. On this day, she wore the Hanfu she had just bought on the street, and she was a living Yang Guifei. Suddenly she was stopped by a handsome man, who pulled up her hand affectionately and said: A hundred years ago, you threw a hydrangea ball to invite relatives, and then a showman caught the hydrangea ball, do you remember this? I came here to meet you! She froze, and then her face turned red: Are you that showman? The handsome man shook his head and smiled slightly: "No, I am the hydrangea ball."

3. The mother-in-law was in a car accident and was hit by a Mercedes Benz and became a vegetative person. Yesterday I went up the mountain to burn incense for her, just in time for the pilgrim to follow the monk's chanting practice. I knelt down beside a beautiful woman and said to her, "Close your eyes when you chant the sutra, so that the spirit will be there and the Buddha will bless you." Beauty smiled and nodded, "Okay, I see. "Then the monk began to chant, and I looked at the beautiful woman and left with her purse and mobile phone...

4. Take a friend's car back to Shanghai, the supermarket hotel in the service area is not open! My friend took a rice cooker from the trunk and my friend told me to take it. In front of everyone in the service area, I felt very embarrassed and my face was hot! But when we eat rice from the rice cooker, it is accompanied by chili sauce brought from home. I heard a few guys eating instant noodles behind me, and they heard a flurry of salivating sounds.

5. The brother-in-law failed to get into the exam and plans to go to an art school. But the old man resolutely disagreed, and said: You don't have a foundation in art, you can't go. The brother-in-law begged for all kinds, and the old man was a sentence: you can't go without an art foundation. Finally, the brother-in-law was forced to be anxious, pointing to the award on the wall and saying: Who said I had no foundation? Since the third grade, the award certificates have all been drawn by myself, do you see that they are fake?

6. My second uncle was sick, and my daughter-in-law gave me 100 yuan to visit him in the hospital. I bought fruit and went to the hospital to find my uncle lying on the window. I said awkwardly: Uncle, I don't know you are also sick, I asked my wife to ask for money to come back to you. Uncle Da immediately jumped up: You want me to be sick? I came to chat with your uncle, you are out of this, buy some fruit and ask your wife for money? I can't afford to eat! Me: No, Uncle, you're sick, you lie down, I'll take a picture first!

7. Cousins like to buy things online, especially those that are discounted. In the past few days, she suddenly found that an ugly orange product was greatly discounted, so she bought a box of ugly oranges online, and as a result, people mailed her back a box of oranges. The cousin theorized with the merchant: "I bought ugly oranges, how do you mail me oranges!" The merchant replied: "The baby you bought was polished by me for free, why are you not satisfied?" ”

8. Dad is also a talent, and he really laughed me to death. On the twenty-fifth anniversary of my parents' marriage, my father gave my mother a ring, and my mother showed off everyone. Early yesterday morning, my mother roared and asked where my father had gone. I shook my head and said I didn't know, and when I asked, I knew that my mother had gone to the market yesterday morning to buy a chicken. I saw a copper ring of chicken feet, buckled down and looked at it, exactly the same as the "ring" sent by my father!

 #Funny# #搞笑段子 #