1, on the bus, there is a sister, and a foreigner in English conversation, the conversation is huge, the sister's expression is exaggerated, from time to time also laugh, so it lasted, for a long time. The girl suddenly used it

1, on the bus, there is a sister, and a foreigner in English conversation, the conversation is huge, the sister's expression is exaggerated, from time to time also laugh, so it lasted, for a long time. The girl suddenly asked the driver with Chinese: Has xxx station arrived? Driver A: It's over. The girl was furious: Why don't you report the station? The driver calmly replied: Speaking Chinese, I am afraid that you will not understand.

2. My sister-in-law has just been promoted to manager of the company, and her work is much busier than before. Yesterday I went to pick up my little niece from school and met my high school classmates I hadn't seen for years at the school gate. He was surprised and said: Yo, I haven't seen you in a few years, your children are so old. The little niece gave me a blank look at my classmates: Uncle, are you not wearing glasses? Do you think my aunt can give birth to such a beautiful girl as me?

3. On the airfield, the plane has landed and is still taxiing, and the passengers all stand up to take their luggage. For safety the stewardess said on the radio: "Ladies and gentlemen, our plane is still taxiing, please sit down and close the overhead luggage rack." As a result, a hurried broadcast became: "Ladies and gentlemen, our plane is gliding OK..." At this time, the captain of the "ding-dong" said: "Who is praising me?" "It made the people on the plane laugh.

4, the unit of a new female colleague is a big beauty, I like it very much, has not had the courage to confess. Today I said to her, "Shall I introduce you to a boyfriend?" The female colleague said, "Wow, wow, wow! Me: "What are the conditions?" Female colleagues, after thinking about it, said: "Male, live!" I whispered in my heart, "What do you think of me?" The female colleague glanced at me, suddenly sighed and said, "Some people are alive, he is already dead!" ”

5, today and the goddess online chat, chat is very pleasant, suddenly I said: goddess, be my girlfriend, I can give you all I have, you want I will do my best for you to achieve. The goddess was stunned, and after about two minutes, she replied: "lZ-np-un6?" "Saying that if you understand it, you will understand what I mean, I thought bitterly, there is no way, ask for help from the gods!" What does this mean? "

6, my brother- in-law, the family is engaged in real estate business, the family conditions are very superior. From time to time, Brother Ren was arranged by his family to study abroad, and he bought a fur coat abroad and asked me how to identify the true and false. We opened the video and she showed off to me. I said: You light it with a lighter and smell it, and the smell of burning hair is real. After a while, a scream came from the other end of the video. As a result, she ordered a whole piece, am I in trouble?

7. Two days ago, I made an appointment with a friend to drive to the beach, and when I got downstairs to her house, I saw that she was reversing. I hurried over to help her direct, and a cleaning aunt next to me pulled me aside: Don't go over, this female driver is crazy. I looked puzzled: Auntie, what do you mean by that? Aunt Cleaning said: She has been tossing here for more than 1 hour, and she saw that the holly next to her did not, just now she reversed the car and got in the way, directly got out of the car and picked up the knife and cut it off, I am afraid that you will be hurt by her in the past. "

8. After graduating from college, the school flower opened a small supermarket with her father's pension. Yesterday, when I passed by her small supermarket and wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes, I saw two customers in the supermarket arguing again. The strange thing is that the school flower only watched from the side, did not stop, I was very strange and asked her: your customer why don't you care? The school flower said: The customer is God, the battle of the gods, I mortals dare to participate. What she said made sense, and I didn't have anything to refute it.

9. In order to fight for decades, I endured humiliation and heavy burdens and married the chairman's 280-pound sister-in-law. Not long after I got married, she bore me a son. Today I took my son to the hospital for preventive injections, and the whole house was filled with the cries of children. When it was my turn, the doctor said: Hold the child's arm with your hand. The son did not cry, and the people next to him praised his son's bravery. In a burst of praise, I cried: Doctor, you stabbed me in the hand!?

10. Lingdao liked my wife's figure and promoted me to regional manager, and I immediately divorced my wife. Within a few days, I was married to a divorced woman with children. After marriage, my son and this child were particularly unsophisticated, and the two of them often quarreled. Last night, because of the quarrel again because of grabbing the TV remote control, the son took a fruit knife and asked him: Do you believe that I flew to death with a knife? Then, while talking and learning the Little Li Flying Knife, the child was stunned for two seconds and then returned to the room crying wolf. The son was particularly proud to take the knife and intended to cut the fruit, and then he found that only one handle was left...

11. The first time I went to my girlfriend's house, my aunt brought up a plate of walnuts and said: The hometown specialty crispy walnuts, you taste! Then grabbed a few and put them in my hand. I just talked to my uncle and didn't eat, I kept playing around in my hands. When my girlfriend's grandmother saw that I had not eaten, she took a walnut from the fruit plate and said: You can peel this walnut like this, and put the walnut in your hand into your mouth. Only a click was heard, only to see Grandma spit out a bloody tooth and a complete walnut. Ha ha! I couldn't stop laughing, and my hand squeezed a few walnuts to pieces!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #