Overnight, 18-year-old Gu Ailing blew up the Internet and became a real "top stream". Ski geniuses, school bullies, and 00 generations are expected to spend more than 200 million yuan, these hot words have brought everyone a sense of excitement, and her mother Gu Yan has also entered everyone's field of vision.
Gu Yan grew up in Beijing, studied at Peking University, was a member of the Peking University short track speed skating team and ski instructor when she went to school, studied in the United States after graduation, and became an MBA at Stanford University Business School, and later worked as an investor on Wall Street.
For the reports on the Internet about Gu Ailing's family education, most of them are derived from documentaries and materials, this time we interviewed Gu Yan's friend Yolanda in San Francisco. Yolanda watched Gu Ailing grow up at the age of two, providing us with the home education she observed gu Ailing.
"After becoming famous, everyone will see a character wrapped in an aura of success under the aura, and everything I see happened before they became famous." 」
The following is a conversation between the children's book mom and Yolanda.
Q1
High achievement children
There's a tiger mom behind you?
NO!
TSMM : In your eyes, what kind of person is Gu Ailing's mother?
Y: I rarely admire a person wholeheartedly, but I really admire Gu Yan very much.
Friends around you know that she will look for your good qualities at the first sight and make others feel good about themselves. That's how she treats others and the way she treats her daughters – pure love, care and respect, without any fuss.
TSMM: Some people say that Gu Yan is a tiger mother, do you agree?
Y : Gu Yan is not a tiger mother, tiger mother means oppression, persecution, power, in my eyes, Gu Yan has never been. She truly respects Ai Ling's choices since she was a child. What the child is not willing to do, she will not force the child.
TSMM: Gu Ailing is in Beijing, and she also went to the Olympic math class, right?
Y : Yes, every year during the summer vacation, Ailing returns to China for two months, the schedule is full from beginning to end, taking cultural classes, learning music, practicing skiing, basketball, trampolines, and going to the Aquatic Olympic Center to practice water skiing, Ailing has the courage to try various things. That was her interest, not her mother's persecution, and the time was full, and the child did not complain a word. If the child is not willing to go, the mother will never force her.
Q2
Is self-driving force innate?
TSMM: It seems that Gu Ailing is a child who is born with self-driving power and can "chicken himself"?
Y : This is not the case in my opinion. When Ai Ling was eleven or twelve years old, she was learning to ride a horse, and I asked her mother: When the child is tired, it is easy to complain, why can your family Love Ling not be tired, not annoyed, not complaining?
She said: "Every child expects a sense of satisfaction, and satisfaction is the motivation for them to do things. Satisfaction will be high at first, and then it will be slowly consumed, especially when you do not progress yourself and others are progressing, if you want to maintain satisfaction, you have to pay more.
For parents, what can be done is to remove the child's psychological satisfaction without using their own words and behaviors. Encourage, not blame.
TSMM Do you think that Ailing can achieve today because she is highly talented?
Y : It is normal for a mother to ski and have a good talent, but not all gifted people can stick to it. Many people were more talented than her and gave up halfway. I think that what makes Ai Ling is the education of the mother, and it is the mother who is the person.
You rarely hear her complaining, she always says: This is a good thing, you go and do it. You're always laughing with her, she makes people think everything is funny.
Under the influence of her mother, Ai Ling has a very sunny personality, never complains, looks good about everything, and is not easy to fall into negative emotions. Injured, broken bones and abandoned? Impossible, from her point of view, she didn't think it was pain.
Q3
The greatest gift a parent gives to their child
What is it?
TSMM : In your opinion, in addition to a positive psychological attitude, what are the factors that make Gu Ailing?
Y : There is also self-discipline. She showed this self-discipline when she was very young, and when the car arrived at the station, she could quickly adjust her emotions no matter how sleepy she was, and she would not lose her temper.
When we were about twelve or thirteen years old, we went to the beach to play, and the first thing she did was to do her homework first, and then play after doing her homework.
In her, you can observe that she knows very well what role she is in what situation, the student is the student role, the play is the role of play, so her concentration is particularly strong, learn to learn well, play is fun, no distraction.
The other is reading. Ai Ling has been very fond of reading since she was a child, and when she was eight or nine years old, she talked about life with people who studied Sinology, had strong thinking logic, and was willing to express her ideas, which was inseparable from reading.
TSMM: Ailing got hundreds of millions of endorsement fees at such a young age, and now many people praise her, but as an elder, do you worry that some people will be jealous, just like some people worry: the higher you go, the greater the risk?
Y : I am confident that her foundation is there, inner health, sunshine, no matter what choice she makes in the future, it will be very positive, no matter what difficulties she encounters, what kind of future she has, optimistic and positive mentality, the ability to think rationally, can give her a steady stream of strength, which is also the best gift that parents can give their children.
Write at the end:
For the growth of Gu Ailing, Professor, Supervisor and Professor Kong Aiguo of the School of Management of Fudan University commented:
Gu Ailing is too good, too good to imitate, even in the middle-class family in the United States, it is impossible to cultivate such a comprehensive baby.
First of all, there must be enough economic base, and every hobby costs money. And it's not a little bit, nor is it the goal of working families.
Secondly, it is necessary to be accompanied by adults and professional guidance, otherwise it is impossible to stick to it for a long time. Scientific means can overcome every bottleneck in training.
Third, there must be enough space for Sino-US exchanges, and it is difficult for pure Americans and pure Chinese to do so. And very well done. Can you send your kids to the U.S. during the holidays?
Fourth, what is the persistence in the concept of cultivation, stimulating certain desires in her heart, allowing her to pursue the highest point of interest, of course, there can be no utilitarian thoughts, once there is utilitarianism, the action will be deformed.
Fifth, once a unique competitive advantage is formed, it is necessary to find commercial value for the fruits of its growth, which is her parents' high, the largest market for application scenarios is China, endorsing various brands, and behind it is a strong promotion team.
For ordinary families, the only thing that can learn and not spend a penny is the concept of family education, to put it bluntly, it is the cultivation of parents themselves at the spiritual level.
In our conversation with Yolanda, we found that the most successful part of Gu Ailing's family education lies in her positive and positive way of thinking. Many people claim to respect children and see the advantages of children, but in fact they see many more disadvantages than advantages.
In the eyes of her friends, not only treating her own children, Gu Yan treats everyone around her like this, which is her great point. Have you ever seen such a person: see who is sick, see who is not used to it? They bring negative energy not only to others, but also to themselves.
Philosophically, when you are confident enough to accept your flaws and always see your strengths, it shows that you have the power to love yourself. At this time, you can also accept the flaws of others, always see the advantages of others, and see the benefits of any thing. Life is then filled with kindness, joy, gratitude, and love.
They can then be undistracted, accumulate energy, and devote themselves to what they love and ignite their lives.
Is this really the case with Gu Ailing? From the video at the press conference, you can see it at a glance.