1. The chairman went to the countryside to transfer relatives and asked the peasant relatives: "Has Moutai been drunk?" The peasant relative said, "Drunk!" The chairman asked again: "Have you eaten bird's nest and shark fin soup?" The farmer relative said:

1. The chairman went to the countryside to transfer relatives and asked the peasant relatives: "Has Moutai been drunk?" The peasant relative said, "Drunk! The chairman asked again: "Have you eaten bird's nest and shark fin soup?" The peasant relative said, "I have eaten!" The chairman was surprised to hear this: "Your life here is not bad!" The peasant relatives laughed and said, "Yes, they say that those things are fake!" ”

2. My father-in-law won the first prize in the big lottery and became rich overnight. When he learned that the price of gold was reduced, the father-in-law immediately took his uncle to the gold store. After walking around the store for a while, I took a fancy to a gold ring, and the waiter calculated that it was 1020. When he was about to pay, the little uncle said loudly to his father-in-law: Dad, you are crazy! 1000 buy a ring, you give me 1 dollar, I now go to my school to buy a ring bigger than this, and there is a big diamond on it! Father-in-law..."

3. The cousin is a migrant worker of Futukang, but he has found a girlfriend who is a school flower. It made me feel very unbalanced, and I ran to the bar alone to drink a drink. After three rounds of drinking, I couldn't help but grumble: God is so unfair! Why I've been single! Why can't I find a girlfriend all the time! At this time, a beautiful woman with a good figure came over and said: Handsome man, please let me have a drink, I am in the same situation as you. I was furious: You can't find my ass, and you want me to have a drink, roll!

4, the female supervisor picked up a red Porsche 911 from the 4s store, and as a result, it hit a tree just two days after driving. She took the car to the 4s shop and I took her home after work. When I arrived, the female supervisor had to drag me upstairs to drink tea, and before I could take a sip of tea, there was a knock at the door. She said that her husband had returned, and I said: I just came to your house for tea, I didn't do anything, it's okay. The female supervisor looked panicked: No, my husband's suspicion is particularly heavy, the explanation is not clear, you still have to hide. As soon as I looked at it, there was no guardrail in a single room and a balcony, and there was no way to hide from people. She lives on the second floor of a self-built house, and I jumped down and ran when I saw that it was not high, thinking that it was really wrong. Later, when I met and greeted less at the company, not long after, she spoke to me again, saying that she had moved to a new home and let me go over for tea. I casually asked how many floors to live, she said 18th floor, I listened to the legs and stomach cramps, almost fainted...

5. The son in the third grade writes homework in the room after school. After a while, he came over and said: Mom, I'm done with my homework, my eyelids are fighting, I want to go to sleep. Me: Okay, go to sleep! Get up early in the morning. After a while, I went to see if he was asleep, and without thinking, he was lying on the bed playing with his phone. I said angrily: Aren't you fighting with your eyelids? How to still play mobile phone? Son: Just now it was a fight, I found an outsider to persuade them, and they reconciled.

6) In a remote mountainous area, a group of militants is experimenting with the missiles they have just acquired. As a result, the missile was accidentally deflected and landed in a resident's house. Everyone saw that she had seized the time to save people, found an old lady in the ruins, and brought her out and laughed wildly. Everyone thought that the old lady was overly frightened and rushed her to the hospital. The doctor examined her and said, "This old lady is no big deal." "The crowd was relieved to hear this! Old lady: "Hahaha, I sat on the toilet and put a fart, and the house fell down."

7. At the class reunion in the hotel, I and my first love girlfriend looked at each other affectionately. I asked her bitterly: Why did you reject me so cruelly? First love said: Because every time I see you, my heart beats faster, my face is flushed, and my body is hot, I thought I would die of illness with you! I continued to ask: Then why did you get married? The first love took a sip of wine and said: Because I am married to a doctor!

8. Relatives found an object for the sister-in-law, and the mother-in-law asked the sister-in-law: What do you think? Sister-in-law: What does he do? Mother-in-law: I don't know, anyway, relatives say that he has a lot of money! Soon after, the sister-in-law married out, and as a result, she cried into tears when she returned to the door. Mother-in-law: What's wrong, he hit you? Sister-in-law: What a lot of money, he is a sick straw man, every day to treat the disease, waist is full of fire cans ... Mother-in-law: Ah.

9, my neighbor Zhang Aunt next door to my house happens to be a matchmaker, see I am not small, said to introduce me to an object, so I made an appointment to meet in a Western restaurant. The two sat down in a flurry of greetings, in order to increase the goodwill in her mind. I took the initiative to talk to her about literature, from Murong Xi's poems to Yu Qiuyu's prose to Dan Brown's novels. She looked at me with a puzzled look on her face, and I said to him, "Is there anything you don't understand, you can ask." She: "Are you not carrying money?" ”

10. Mr. Dongguo was driving a donkey on a large bag of books on the mountain, and a wolf came over and said, "Sir, please hide me in your pocket!" After escaping this disaster, I will repay your kindness! Mr. Dongguo stuffed the wolf into the bag. After a while, I saw a she-wolf in a red robe a pan in a fierce manner...

11. Not long after working in the gym, I met a girl who liked my eight-pack abs. Soon, she confessed to me, and I agreed, and I quit my job by the way. On my birthday, my girlfriend gave me a Bentley, and I was bored and went to run Didi. On this day, I took an order, and when I arrived, I found out that it was my ex-girlfriend and her current boyfriend. After being delivered to the destination, the ex-girlfriend asked pitifully, "Are we really unable to go back?" I looked down and thought about it and said, "Hometown?" Yes, add 500 pieces and it's almost the same. ”

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #