Author | Miss White Source | Michelia (ID:nvrendds)
Ending song: A Man - Fan Ziyan
See a question on Zhihu:
How much does a man have to make each month to support a family?
One of the most liked anonymous answers was:
I earn two or three hundred thousand a year, and my lover is a housewife, but it is not me who supports this family, but she.
I don't know why, when I saw this sentence, I was very touched.
Some people say that marriage comes to the end, but it is only the left hand holding the right hand, which is boring.
People are bored, always thinking of tossing something new out, so there will always be one marriage farce around them.
Knowing this anonymous husband is particularly scarce.
In a good marriage, men know that you understand you and spoil you into children; in bad marriages, men resent you and hate you, first turn you into a man, and then force you into a madman...
First-class men
Spoil your wife as a child
There is a sentence in "The Siege" that is too classic:
"The people who are surrounded by the city want to escape, and the people outside the city want to rush in."
You see, this sentence alone makes marriage more transparent. Many people grind repeatedly, deeply feeling that marriage is a trap, and they must not be planted in it.
Qian Zhongshu himself, but in the marriage, he was comfortable. "Spoiling the wife demon" is one of his achievements that have been praised by the world in addition to his talents.
Qian Zhongshu, who is sharp and arrogant and poisonous, is not pleasing to anyone's eyes, only to see that Yang Dai is full of treasures.
Such a first-class man with a good family and top talent, but he is strong and has a "reputation wife fetish" and spoils his wife as a child.
When I first arrived in a foreign country, I was afraid that Yang Dai was not used to it, and a brother who came from his front clothes to reach for food to open his mouth, clumsily made breakfast, and set up a small table for her on the bed before waking her up.
Such a breakfast has been cooked for decades.
Yang Dai was pregnant, and he carefully booked a single delivery room early. After giving birth to the child, he changed his tricks to cook chicken soup and waited for Yang Dai to sit well.
Because he was reluctant to let Yang Dai suffer from childbirth, he said that he only needed one child in this life: "I don't want a son, I want a daughter, like your daughter..."
How many people envy such marriages, because even when they are old, they still love each other. Even when he is old, Yang Dai is still an old child in Qian Zhongshu's eyes.
What a rare "quality" a man is willing to spoil his wife as a child. Therefore, such a man is a first-class man!
Second-class man
Turn your wife into a man
"After getting married, I became more and more independent."
When I first saw this sentence, I thought it was a good thing.
Not a few people, after entering the marriage, just like the flowers that originally grew on the Gobi were moved into the greenhouse, the harsh environment can grow happily, once they enter the greenhouse, they slowly wither.
It is accustomed to the watering of people, accustomed to the careful care of people. There are people who love flowers, and there are not many who can take care of flowers patiently for a long time.
People, like flowers, become dependent, and fate is no longer firmly in their hands.
So I often hear people say, "Even if you are married, you must be independent."
This sentence is not wrong, the wrong thing is that more and more people have become biased towards this sentence.
Marriage, in the final analysis, is a long-lasting intimate relationship, not a game played by children, fun will continue, not fun will disperse.
Marriage, of course, is for two people to enjoy happiness together. In the vernacular, it is common progress, not to exercise the independent ability of a certain person.
When a woman gets married, she cooks her own food, brings her own children, takes care of the elderly by herself...
Look for men, sorry, never in the service area. In the face of big things, carry yourself; in the face of small things, you top yourself.
The original female Jiao'e gradually became a female man in marriage.
Such "independence" is somewhat ironic.
A man who turns his wife into a real woman, even if there are more reasons, can only be regarded as a second-class man.
Third-class men
Force your wife into a lunatic
There was once a message from a reader that I will never forget:
Crying in front of him, I thought he would be distressed, but I didn't expect to be disgusted. The two words "temperament" are not heavy, but they were deeply rooted in my heart at that time.
Since then, I've remembered. No matter how much he was wronged, he endured it himself, and secretly cried in the bed at night.
I didn't dare to make a sound, and my heart ached. There seemed to be something blocking in his throat, which was particularly uncomfortable.
I used to think that in front of him, I didn't have to pretend to be strong. Or punch in the face, the next life, find the right person.
The person who is most likely to force his wife into a madman is undoubtedly this kind of man.
I often say that the last thing a woman is afraid of is to suffer.
A man knows cold and knows heat, that is, to eat chaff vegetables, and women are also very satisfied. No matter how bitter life is, he is the sugar.
But if a man does not feel sorry for you at all, does not think about you at all, the more bitter, the easier it is to drive a person crazy.
The sacrifices made for the family are, in his opinion, deserved; his bad emotions, you and this family are his outlets; and you, as for you, cannot have emotions, cannot pick up stalls, and still less can you blame him.
Take care of him unconditionally, you have something to stand up to, you carry when you make mistakes, you eat alone, and enjoy him alone.
In the end, you are not allowed to cry, crying is that you are not right, and crying is your temperament.
William Bernard said in the Harvard Family Motto:
"Don't think they won't mind, it's like nailing a nail in a fence, and the injury will leave a lasting mark."
The nails on the woman's body were nailed by the man over and over again, and the old wounds were not healed, and new wounds were seen.
The suffering that a person can endure is not infinite. Such a man will sooner or later force his wife into a madman.
Click [watching], life is difficult, you need someone to help each other. Lucky women will meet first-class men; secondly, they will meet second-class men and save them; again, forget it.
About the author: Miss Bai, a woman in the workplace, writes words with temperature and strength, shares an interesting and meaningful life with you, accompanies you to grow, and accompanies you to be strong. The new book "Live the Way You Want" is in the exclusive pre-sale of Dangdang.com. Source: Michelia White Orchid (ID: nvrendds). *Original title: "First-class men spoil their wives into children, second-class men turn their wives into men, third-class men..."