If you were a woman, would you be willing to have children at the age of 56, I think the answer for the vast majority of women is no.
However, Ms. Guo Min in Beijing resolutely decided to go to the operating table, regardless of the real risk of giving birth to a child at an advanced age, why did Guo Min so resolutely give birth at an advanced age, and what did she have?
Guo Min, born in 1954 in Nanchang to an ordinary worker family, graduated from a small school with good academic performance, Guo Min successfully entered a state-owned enterprise as an accountant.
When Guo Min was 26 years old, she married a colleague in the unit and gave birth to her eldest daughter, Liu Linghui, the following year.
Liu Linghui has been well-behaved and sensible since she was a child, and her studies are very hardworking, which makes Guo Min very loving, and she wants to give her daughter a good future, so she consulted with her husband and planned to move to Beijing, and her daughter's school and life in Beijing is definitely more promising.
But Guo Min's proposal was strongly opposed by her husband, who was a more traditional person who thought that Guo Min was restless and too tossed, and that it was good for the family to stay in Nanchang, and there was no need to go to Beijing.
Later, the couple often quarreled because of this matter, and eventually the feelings were not reconciled and divorced, and Liu Linghui's custody was given to Guo Min's husband.
There is a saying in Europe, the mother is the creator of the child's future destiny, Guo Min deeply understands this truth, she did not give up her plan, shortly after the divorce, Guo Min resigned from the job of a state-owned enterprise, a person went to Beijing alone, planning to work hard in Beijing first, and then take his daughter after gaining a firm foothold in Beijing.
In the past few years of working in Beijing, Guo Min has saved almost all her income in the name of her daughter, and she has only one goal, that is, to make her daughter live the best life.
In 2001, Guo Min's fourth year in Beijing, she and Ren Dahua, a retired Shougang worker, restructured a family.
After Beijing stabilized, Guo Min took her daughter to Beijing in 2002, so Guo Min also bought a house in Chaoyang District so that her daughter could work in Beijing.
Everything was arranged, but a car accident brought these plans to an abrupt end.
In 2003, because of SARS, Liu Linghui left Beijing and returned to his hometown, and this farewell left Guo Min and his daughter Tianren forever.
On November 21, 2005, Guo Min received a text message from his daughter's aunt on the bus, which said: Liu Linghui died in a car accident, and Guo Min felt that the sky was dark, as if the sky had collapsed.
For 51-year-old Guo Min, the blow of this middle-aged widow is fatal, not to mention that her daughter is her only spiritual pillar.
When Guo Min returned to her hometown, her daughter's body had been cremated, and she returned to Beijing without seeing her last face.
During that time, Guo Min always locked himself in the house, every day with his daughter's photo to look at for half a day, looking at it will be unable to help but cry, Guo Min can not eat or sleep, the whole person is skinny.
Guo Min's second husband Ren Dahua saw her like this, but also very sad, many times advised Guo Min to open a little, as the saying goes, time can make a person lose everything, but the only thing that can not be given up is family affection, Guo Min's affection for his daughter, is always unable to forget.
Guo Min was depressed for a long time, and she also had migraines, and she even had the idea of taking her own life, until a piece of news broke into Guo Min's sight, and her gray life had a glimmer of light, the news said that there was a big mother in Japan, because she lost her child, at the age of 60, through embryo transfer technology, she successfully gave birth to a son.
This news makes Guo Min ignite the hope of life, others can be born at the age of 60, why can't they be born when they are only 54, and Guo Min stubbornly believes that the daughter of regeneration is the daughter who died to find her mother again.
For the wife to give birth, the second husband Ren Dahua is very opposed, there are two reasons, the first is worried about the wife's body, in case the child is not born, the wife can withstand the successive blows.
Second, the conditions in the family are not too good, the children are born, they are not young, what to take to support the children.
For her husband's analysis, although Guo Min listened, her determination to have children was like eating a scale and having an iron heart.
Therefore, despite her husband's objections, Guo Min went to several Beijing public hospitals to consult about embryo transfer, but when the doctor heard that it was a 54-year-old woman who was going to do embryo transfer, he was a little surprised and bluntly advised her to give up.
In fact, embryo transfer technology is not difficult, but few doctors do embryo transfer to women over 50 years old, whether it is for Guo Min's safety considerations, or for the reputation of the hospital, almost all hospitals have rejected Guo Min.
But Guo Min has never given up, after she inquired, she learned that there is a private hospital in Chaoyang, Beijing, which is good at embryo transfer, this hospital not only introduced advanced equipment from abroad, the person in charge Dr. Liu is still Dr. Liu in the United States, Guo Min took this hospital as the last hope, and after seeing Dr. Liu, he begged bitterly.
Dr. Liu was also a little moved in the end, and instead of rejecting Guo Min's request, he asked her to do a test first, and then depending on the situation.
After the test results came out, guo min was given a glimmer of hope that her uterus had not yet atrophied and that embryo transfer could be done.
Therefore, after a year of cultivation, the 55-year-old Guo Min asked Dr. Liu to transplant 3 embryos at the same time, and the next time, Guo Min was cautious every day, worried about miscarriage, in order to save the fetus she also drank three bowls of soy milk every day.
In the end, two of the three embryos were saved, and Guo Min gave birth to the next pair of dragon and phoenix fetuses by caesarean section on April 6, 2010, named Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi, and it was these two children that gave Guo Min the courage to live.
56-year-old childbirth, this is how difficult, the child was born Guo Min loved it, when taking care of the child, always hug Ren Jiabin, and kiss Ren Jiayi.
The birth of two small lives has added endless happiness to their family, but they also have to face some real-life problems, such as the problem of overcrowded housing.
Ren Dahua has a son, who is 36 years old and has not yet started a family, and it is not a solution for the family to be crammed into a small house.
Therefore, Guo Min and Ren Dahua discussed it, and then left the house they are living in to this son, and the couple took Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi to rent a house in Changping District, and the monthly rent was 600 yuan.
Although the price of changping district at that time was not high, it still needed a lot of money to raise two children.
Ren Dahua and Guo Min's pension together is less than 5,000 yuan, to ensure that the basic life of their children is no problem, but to give the two children a good future is not enough, for this reason, Guo Min had to find a job, she interviewed several companies, but because of her age was rejected.
In July 2013, sixty-five-year-old Ren Dahua suddenly fainted and was diagnosed with cerebral infarction after being sent to the hospital, Guo Min could only take care of two children while going to the hospital to take care of his wife, fortunately, Ren Dahua was discharged five months later.
However, after being discharged from the hospital, Ren Dahua's body has since collapsed, and he is still a little unable to take care of himself, let alone take care of Guo Min and his two children.
Later, Ren Dahua proposed to go back to his eldest son and let his eldest son take care of him, so that Guo Min could concentrate on taking care of Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi, and Guo Min reluctantly agreed.
The family, which was not rich in the first place, was aggravated by Ren Dahua's hospitalization, and Ren Dahua's pension could only be used for his own life, while Guo Min's living expenses on his two children were only fifteen yuan.
In order to save money, Guo Min took her two children to rent a cheaper small house, although the house is only more than ten square meters, but it can save two hundred yuan per month in rent.
But where the money is saved, it is earned, so Guo Min once again has the idea of going out to work.
In the end, Guo Min found a part-time job, using her status as a senior certified public accountant to help the company do the accounting, you can get 200 yuan per month, Guo Min in order to make more money, at the same time took over the part-time of 7 companies.
The woman is weak, the mother is strong, since then in addition to taking care of the two children, Guo Min has devoted all her time to work, countless nights, Guo Min put the child to sleep, she turned on the lamp to work hard, until one or two o'clock in the morning she will rest, the time to sleep every day is only four hours.
In addition, the good account books also need Guo Min to personally send to the company, and some of these companies are in Haidian, some are in Daxing or Fangshan, Guo Min has to walk in addition to taking a car, but she has never complained.
She herself once said: "Since giving birth to two children, I feel that the whole person is ten years younger, as long as the two children grow up healthily, I am willing to be willing even if I am tired and tired." ”
After all, this pair of children is not only a continuation of Guo Min's life, but also a continuation of the footprints of the eldest daughter Liu Linghui in this world.
When the child reaches the age of three, it will be very lively and active, ren jiabin and ren jiayi are the same, they will crawl on the bed or the ground, it is easy to fall or bump, in order not to be distracted at work, Guo Min will tie a belt on the waist of the two children, and then tie the other end of the belt to the pole at the head of the bed.
When the two children reached the age of kindergarten, Guo Min had to spend half an hour every day personally sending them to school, and when it came time to cross the road, there were many vehicles around, and Guo Min would grasp the hands of the two children, worried about the recurrence of the tragedy.
Seeing that the two children entered the school gate of the kindergarten, Guo Min would leave with confidence, return home, and plunge into the work again, at noon even an egg was not willing to eat, only eat a bag of instant noodles or steamed bread and pickles, continue to do accounting in the afternoon, and then go out to pick up the child at 4 o'clock.
In order to supplement the nutrition of the two children, Guo Min will make them a bowl of chicken cake every three to five minutes, while Guo Min herself drinks radish soup, she wants to give the best to the child, as the saying goes, the father is higher than the mountain, and the mother is deeper than the sea, which is fully reflected in Guo Min's body.
The two children like to eat fish the most, Guo Min often cooks them fish soup, but also carefully picks the fish bones, in order to buy fresher and cheaper fish, Guo Min will take the bus, to the suburban rural market, each fish can save ten yuan.
Guo Min is always meticulous in life, want to save some more money, and keep it for her two children to go to school, so she will cut a fish into four pieces and use a piece of fish meat to boil soup every week, so that a fish can eat for a month, so that when the two children grow up, they will not be unable to keep up with nutrition.
Guo Min believes that for the two children, there is still some guilt, after all, they are still suffering in life, but simple children cannot appreciate the hardships in life and will not blame their mothers.
For the two children, even if the light emitted by the mother is weak, it can still warm their hearts, Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi will hug Guo Min when they see her, often saying: "Mom, I miss you." ”
Even if it is not easy in normal times, at this moment, Guo Min is still full of relief and has the courage to face the difficulties in life, and the two children thrive under the care of Guo Min, who believes that everything she does is worth it.
In 2016, when the two children finished kindergarten and reached the age of primary school, a lucky thing happened to Guo Min, who bought the house she bought for her eldest daughter in the early years as a primary school district, and Guo Min moved into the house with her two children, so that the two children could get a better education.
Perennial fatigue, so that the elderly Guo Min body some can not eat, one day when she was doing housework, twisted to the waist, she thought that in a few days it would be good, but the waist is getting more and more painful, and finally Guo Min can only go to the hospital to see a doctor, fortunately, it is a small problem, take a few days of medicine is good, but the doctor told Guo Min to pay more attention to the body after that.
Guo Min did not listen to the doctor's advice, still working day and night, after all, after the two children went to primary school, living expenses and tuition fees will increase, which need Guo Min to work hard, she does not want to rest, but can not rest.
In 2017, Guo Min, who had devoted all her efforts to her two children, fell ill, got a lacunar cerebral infarction, and after a period of hospitalization, her condition was controlled, but Guo Min had to rest more, so she quit her five part-time jobs, and her monthly income shrank significantly, which made Guo Min very worried about the future of her two children.
As the biological father of two children, Ren Dahua's feelings for Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi are somewhat complicated, and he loves these two children very much, but regrets giving birth to them.
Ren Dahua also felt great pressure, he made a suggestion, send away a child for others to raise, since Guo Min only wanted to have a daughter, then send away Ren Jiabin, leaving only Ren Jiayi.
But this suggestion was rejected by Guo Min, who has a strong personality and is very resilient, she believes that no matter how hard life is, she cannot send any child away, and Guo Min said that in the future, the two children do not have to be managed by Dahua, and the future of the two children will be borne by herself.
In 2018, Ren Dahua died of illness, and the two children were only eight years old at this time, and the only thing they could rely on was their mother Guo Min.
And Guo Min suddenly felt that the burden on her shoulders was heavier, she would worry about her body, after all, she was 64 years old at this time, and she had suffered a cerebral infarction before, if she also died, the two young children would be helpless.
Guo Min made a plan for the future of the two children, and when Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi graduated from primary school, Guo Min was already 70 years old and might not be able to take care of two children again, let alone wait until the two children graduated from college, so Guo Min wanted Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi to go to technical school after graduating from junior high school.
As long as they finish the technical school, then the two children have the skills to make a living, and they can support themselves after entering the society, and the poor parents in the world are also Guo Min's hard heart.
The only thing that the aging Guo Min can't rest assured of is her two children, she always carefully maintains her body in her life, afraid that if she is not careful, her body will go wrong.
The doctor once reminded Guo Min that she was likely to be in danger of stroke, which made Guo Min very worried, and she watched the health program on TV every day to learn the knowledge of stroke prevention.
People's whole life has to face life, old age, illness and death, no one can escape this law, Guo Min wants to do his part for the two children when he is alive, in the last moments of life, silently provide a guardian for the children, for them to do the last escort.
Parents are there, life still has a place, parents are not there, life is only the way home, Guo Min has a wish, she hopes that she can live to a hundred years old, so that she can accompany two more children, but also let the two children become orphans a little later, she also wants to see the moment when the two children get married.
For Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi, everything Guo Min has paid is not only to bring them a good life, but also to feel warm when they grow up, when they think of their mother, they will feel warm, their hearts are full of strength, and they have the courage to overcome difficulties.
Ren Jiabin and Ren Jiayi brothers and sisters also know that their mother wants to accompany them for a long time, so the two children will collect some longevity methods, Ren Jiabin usually likes to read comics, he learned a way to live to a hundred years old from comic books.
So he quickly told Guo Min: "Mom, the book says that as long as you drink milk for 1200 months continuously, you can live to 100 years old." Guo Min smiled after listening to it, and suddenly felt that his son was gradually understanding.
Guo Min regards living to a hundred years old as a life belief, and strives towards this goal every day, and the cerebral infarction becomes an obstacle for Guo Min to run towards the goal, and she has to eat a piece of aspirin every morning to reduce blood lipids and prevent cerebral infarction from getting out of control.
Guo Min will carefully take care of his body in his daily life, even if it is some small problems, Guo Min will try to avoid it.
For example, when the temperature is low, she will wear a very thick plush hat when she goes out, and wrap the entire head tightly to prevent colds or strokes, and the doctor once reminded her to prevent strokes in life, otherwise it will aggravate cerebral infarction.
Illness has become Guo Min's biggest enemy, for the health of her and her two children, she formulated a strict diet plan: "Everyone eats a boiled egg in the morning, drinks a bottle of yogurt, used to supplement nutrition, eats pasta at night, is conducive to digestion, is good for the stomach and intestines, eats ginger and garlic often when eating, the former is used to dispel dampness, the latter is used to prevent colds, every Tuesday and Wednesday boil mung bean water to drink, mung bean water detoxification, can also prevent colds." ”
To live a long life, adequate sleep is essential, Guo Min no longer stays up late to work as before, but goes to bed early and gets up early, goes to bed before ten o'clock every day, and guarantees 7 hours of sleep.
Before going to bed, Guo Min will do a health exercise, tie a horse step, do the action of the eight duan Jinzhong, and then close her eyes, gently beat her head with her hand, at this moment she let the body and mind relax, the mentality is gradually peaceful, she knows that there is a saying in health science that the disease is born from the heart, and the relaxed mind will be healthy.
Guo Min insists that anxiety, pessimism, unbridliness and loneliness are not good for her body, so she has gradually developed a mentality of not being impatient when things happen, and not being pessimistic when encountering difficulties, and learning to enlighten herself.
When Guo Min is at home alone, she will turn up the sound of the TV to make the home look very lively, avoid her heart being in a lonely state, and Guo Min will try to talk to the child as much as possible, so that she and the child can maintain a cheerful attitude.
Good mentality, diet less oil and less salt, more exercise and more rest, Guo Min will strictly implement these health rules in life, she believes that if she goes on this trajectory, she will achieve the goal of living to a hundred years old.
After Guo Min's matter was exposed by the media, it caused a lot of controversy, some people praised her great maternal love, and some people criticized Guo Min for being selfish, despite the opposition of her family, and gave birth to two children in her later years, which dragged down her family, and the future of the two children did not land.
When the reporter interviewed Guo Min, he asked: "You gave birth to two children in your old age when you were very poor, and after so many years, have you ever had a trace of regret?" ”
Guo Min immediately replied to the reporter: "I don't regret it, I have never had the idea of regret in these years, I did not enjoy my old age like others, but I am already very satisfied with my old age." Her tone still reflects her strong character and backbone.
In the face of incomprehension and questioning from the outside world, Guo Min is more often silent, and only opens the conversation box when she chats with her parents who have lost her independence.
Guo Min's situation should be looked at in a group, which is the family that has lost its independence, and as of 2014, the number of families with lost independence in the mainland has reached 1.1 million.
Guo Min was once one of these 1.1 million families, and it is precisely because of the grief of losing independence that Guo Min longed to have another child in his old age, and in Guo Min's body, people also saw the strength of traditional Chinese mothers.
Now the family is basically a child mostly, in case of losing a child, the whole family is afraid that it will be destroyed, and now the family that has lost its independence has received more and more people's attention, and the society has given economic help and love to the families who have lost their independence, passing on a warmth for them, and I believe that more and more families who have lost their independence will come out of sadness in the future.