Hefei Love Couple Marriage And Love Lesson: Quarrels are part of married life, but couples should grasp the measure (6-point convention)
Husbands and wives will always bump into each other when they live together, and their teeth and tongues will fight, not to mention two people with thoughts and emotions together. Therefore, quarrels and anger between husband and wife are inevitable, and even loving couples will quarrel. On the contrary, couples who usually do not quarrel or make trouble may not last long.
It is difficult for the Qing officials to break the household chores, and the ringer needs to be tied to the bell. The matter between husband and wife must ultimately be resolved by the husband and wife themselves, unless the nature of the contradiction between the two sides has changed, otherwise do not go to relatives and friends, do not spread to the neighbors. What is already private, once spreading, can turn into an insurmountable obstacle.
There is no too fixed pattern to regulate the problem of dealing with quarrels, but as long as you keep in mind the following 6 quarrel conventions, you can bridge the cracks in marriage, and even feelings will heat up and consolidate in quarrels .
1. Don't move your mouth:
No matter what kind of dispute occurs, it is necessary for "a gentleman not to move his hands" and not to beat people, not to curse people, and to lay out the facts and reason. Because the contradiction between the two sides will intensify and the nature will change.
2. Avoid the old and the young:
It is extremely unwise to argue in front of the elderly or children, which will not only make the elderly in the family worry, but also easily leave a shadow in the child's heart for a lifetime. In the quarrel, we should also pay special attention to one yard to one yard, and do not take the elderly or children out of anger.
3. Don't mention the old things:
When a dispute arises, it should be discussed on the facts, and whatever the problem is solved. Don't always "lift the gourd root and move", hang up and down, knock on the side, turn over old accounts, mention old things, and poke old wounds in the heart.
4. Do not drop items:
Some couples love to smash things as soon as they quarrel, which is a rather stupid act. If you have a problem, analyze it, and then solve it, why take your own things out of the air? Besides, if something that breaks down has to be bought again, it hurts both the body and the money, isn't it both stupid and cost-loss?
5. Do not refuse to have sex as a punishment:
After a couple quarrels, they often don't talk for a few days, let alone have sex. However, the normal physiological needs of the human body cannot be stopped, especially when one party wants to reconcile but cannot put down the shelf, and sometimes hopes to achieve a willingness to ease through physical contact. At this time, if the other party angrily and coldly refuses, it will greatly hurt the self-esteem of the partner and prolong the Cold War that could have ended there.
6. Who confesses first:
After the quarrel, both sides felt uncomfortable and hoped to end the Cold War. At this time, whoever makes concessions first, speaks first or even admits mistakes will definitely make your partner happy, and then appreciate your forgiveness and open-mindedness even more, and feel guilty for your pettiness. Therefore, do not skimp on the phrase "I'm sorry", it can make the feelings of husband and wife after the quarrel quickly heat up.
Since quarrels in marriage are inevitable, let's pay attention to the "art" of quarrels. Let the "harmonious" quarrel become the lubricant in the married life, let the feelings be more "noisy" and the deeper, and the more "noisy" the love, the sweeter!
(Comprehensive editing according to the network.) If there is any impropriety, please correct)