Intimacy mentions that we fall in love with someone in order to satisfy our unmet needs.
But the reality is that we are often difficult to be satisfied in intimate relationships.
Last week, I revisited the movie "I Want to Be Nice with You" starring Feng Shaofeng and Ni Ni.
In the film, the female protagonist Meowth and the male protagonist Liang Liang are related to drag racing, and they hit it off, and the feelings heat up rapidly, sweet and happy.
Meowth loves to shine because he gives encouragement and hope when his career is in trouble.
Lonely and loveless in her heart, she can sacrifice everything for this ray of sunshine:
She is willing to live with her boyfriend and buy refrigerators and lamps for the common house;
She refuses the temptation of the rich second generation for love, lives an ordinary life, and cycling on the street with her boyfriend can also make her very satisfied;
In order to keep her boyfriend, in case he is moved by other women, she sacrifices her just started career and gives up the opportunity to go to Hengdian to shoot a drama...
She thought that she could get her true heart by giving everything, but in exchange for it, she only had her boyfriend's coldness and running away from home.
When Meowth came to the door, not only could not save the boyfriend, on the contrary, the two broke up after a fierce argument, ending in a breakup.
How can I not understand why such a woman who is obsessed with love hurts so badly in love?
01
Why can't I get along with my lover?
In fact, everyone will have their own relationship problems.
Have you ever had these troubles in your relationship?
Obviously gave everything to move each other, but in exchange for doubling his indifference;
Obviously very good, once in love, you can't help but feel inferior and lose yourself;
Obviously trying to trust each other, but always insecure, suffering from gain and loss...
At this time, you are most likely to have fallen into the trap of intimacy.
An intimate trap is when two or one of the parties in an intimate relationship, in the name of love, does harm, consumes each other's energy like a black hole, and makes the relationship between the two become tense and even broken.
A large part of the injuries you suffer in love stem from the fact that you have brought past pain into the current relationship, fallen into the "intimate trap" you have already set, and you can't escape the predicament no matter how you struggle:
People who are often asked to take care of younger siblings in childhood, and hope to get love through giving in adulthood, it is easy to fall into the trap of "self-touching", often letting the other party escape;
People who have been educated for many years have a low sense of self-worth, and are easy to fall into the trap of "self-depreciation", and once there is a contradiction between the two sides, they begin to doubt themselves;
People who have had neglected experiences, extreme insecurity in their hearts, easy to fall into the trap of "suspicion and suspicion", always do not believe that they are worthy of being loved.......
The pain of the past seems to be healed as you grow up, but in fact it enters the subconscious.
And when you find the object, these seemingly healed wounds will erupt and destroy your intimate relationship.
Just like meow in the film, he looks good and does not pursue material things, is obsessed with love, and loves really. Such a woman deserves a beautiful love.
However, because she did not get enough love in her early years, there was an insecure child in her heart, so that she fell into the intimate trap of "suspicion and suspicion" in adulthood, overly suspicious of the person she loved, and caught the wind and shadows.
She suspected that Liang Liang and his ex-girlfriend had broken the connection, guessed that the female colleague of the company and Liang Liang had an affair, and began to go crazy.
In order to catch the man next to her, she made some amazing moves: jumping threats, installing camera surveillance, burning photos of ex-girlfriends, even phone tests...
When Liang Liang found out that his girlfriend controlled himself, he began to break free and chose to escape, and eventually the relationship between the two broke down.
From Meowth's experience, we can find out how helpless, pathetic and desperate people who fall into the trap of intimacy are, and what should be done to escape the whirlpool of pain?
02
How do you repair yourself and walk into an intimate relationship?
Dear friend, if you have reached adulthood, but when you encounter sad things or difficult obstacles, you feel like a child, always hope that someone can give you warmth, and vaguely feel that there is a black hole inside that cannot be filled, and you want to try to catch that ta, at this time you have fallen into the trap of intimacy.
Manifest in life, you may
In life/love/family interactions, do not dare to express true demands, try to please others
Low sense of self-worth, easy to be kidnapped by emotions, and fall into the trap set by scumbags
It is easy to be hit, once denied by the other party, it loses self-confidence, and it is easy to be PUA
Over-reliance on each other, their own joys and sorrows are all contained by each other's emotions
......
But honey, don't panic, in fact, all this can be adjusted and improved through self-awareness.
In order to get rid of the intimacy trap, heal your wounds, and gain inner happiness, the experts of the One Psychometric Assessment Team have jointly developed the "Intimacy Trap" test, and you will receive:
From the 8 major types of intimate traps such as emotional kidnapping, self-centeredness, and confidence suppression, we summarize which ones you are prone to fall into
Discover emotional crises that you don't easily detect in intimate relationships
The adverse effects of the intimacy trap on your love and life
Analysis of the deep reasons why you fell into the trap
Professional psychological advice to help you get out of the trap
-Intimate Trap Test-
▼
Test questions: 41 questions 丨 Test report: 8 pages
After the test is complete, the generated report is saved permanently
- What will you get? -
"Part of the following presentation report"
01丨The intimacy trap you are prone to fall into
02丨The impact of the intimacy trap on you
03丨Why did you fall into a trap?
04丨 Professional psychology advice
-Intimate Trap Test-
▼
Test questions: 41 questions 丨 Test report: 8 pages
After the test is complete, the generated report is saved permanently