It's been some time since I left the news industry, and when I return to my interviewing work, that familiar intimacy comes over me.
Familiar is not only this wave of "operation": advance appointments, unsyled interviews, conceptual writing;
Familiar also because of the interviewee, she is my former consultant, career planning teacher, and now career partner - Wang Hong.
Before the interview, Teacher Wang Hong asked me if I needed her to prepare questions in advance? I said no.
The outline is the premise before the interview, people are growing and changing every minute and second, the collision of the interview is the most fluid, as long as I present this flow, it is the truest state of life.
It's just that, although there is no outline, there will definitely be a theme, that is, "40 years old", because —
Today is the 40th birthday of Teacher Wang Hong.
40 years old, the word has been shining in my mind since I was a child, and I have been fascinated by my 40 years old.
If life is a long river of babbling and flowing, then 40 years old is like being in the middle of this long river, she is no longer as rushing as when she was young, but in the prime of life with rich life experience, she can calmly and gently face the occasional bumpy current, which is a wonderful chapter in the long river of life.
I am 3 years old and 40 years old, and my heart is full of excitement: What was I like then? How do you feel inside? With whom will you share the first half of your life? How will we look to the future?
Unlike my eagerness, Teacher Wang Hong said that she was natural about the arrival of 40 years old, and the scale of life flowed through this time period naturally, so let's welcome it, and it seems that there is still a little reluctance to pass by time after careful tasting.
There was light and darkness in those times, there was warmth and coldness—
In a quiet village in the corner of southern Anhui, a pair of young ladies and brothers returned from school holding hands, and grandma paced behind them to guard them, and when they got home, they threw their school bags and ran to the rape field in the sun outside the house.
The south wind blows, gushing up one golden wave after another, and the fresh, free and refreshing aroma of the rape flower field is harmonized with the warm, brilliant and wonderful sun rays to become the most beautiful colors of childhood.
The young lady and the little cat and puppy of SaHuan play together, running endlessly towards the endless sea of rape flowers... The flower field that the two pairs of young feet have stepped on with joy is a fertile land in southern Anhui, which is the warm spiritual home of Teacher Wang Hong's heart.
There, however, there are always arguments that unabashedly express belittling women: "Boys are more valuable", "Mom and Dad gave birth to so many girls in order to have a younger brother"...
However, even if I let her deliberately recall that in her small environment, except for her mother who gave birth to multiple girls in a row and finally gave birth to a younger brother, in daily life, she was not particularly skewed because of the gender of the children.
On the contrary, in the mouths of her family, she was the one whose father liked to hold the most; she was the one who slept with her mother until she got married; and she was the one who did not hesitate to be supported by college.
The care of love is sufficient, so she is simple and kind, and her heart is strong;
But the sense of unfairness in being born into a female body is also real, so she is indignant and dissatisfied, trying to change.
In this way, a conflict breeds in the depths of Teacher Wang Hong's heart: the deep love for the homeland is intertwined with the resentment of the land for the unfair treatment of women.
But what a young girl can do, can only start from herself.
Because of her high IQ and proper learning methods, Teacher Wang Hong has shown excellent performance in her studies early on. Her top-notch results have won her a lot of recognition, and she can also be exempted from the responsibility of housework, because her mother will always see that she is studying fully when it is her turn to wash the dishes, and because she can't bear to disturb, she silently washes the dishes for her.
Teacher Wang Hong, who has a sense of achievement in her studies, has poured more time into the ocean of knowledge. She expands her understanding of herself and the world in her encounters with book after book.
In the Outline of Chinese History, she further clarified the essence of Chinese culture after thousands of years of social changes;
Scarlett in "Gone with the Wind" makes her see herself, a unique woman who has to follow the shackles of the environment step by step in order to survive, but the spark of rebellion in her bones needs to burst out;
From Yan Geling and Rainbow Shadow to Ayn Rand, it finds resonance in the monologues of the souls of successive groups of feminist writers.
▲ Writer Ayland
It is only after gaining a deep understanding of the social reality that the conflict is even stronger!
It turns out that the helplessness of suppressing women is the helplessness of the entire nation, with deep-seated reasons that are difficult and difficult to shake.
Most industrious Chinese women can only be wrapped in this wheel of shackles that has been running for thousands of years, even if they change the fate of early marriage and children through reading, but a large number of women are still suffering from spiritual hardships and cannot escape.
Even if they are highly educated women, how many are deeply tormented by low value, afraid of their heads and tails, and unable to bloom their own talents?!
Yeah, the environment is like that.
China did not have the concept of "women" until the end of the Qing Dynasty. In the dominant discourse system of Chinese society, there is no concept of a woman that transcends social human relations.
All words that refer to women refer to women in specific family ethical relations, such as daughters inferior to sons, wives second to husbands, seconders to mothers than fathers, etc. Only when women act in accordance with the norms of their roles stipulated in the kinship relationship can they obtain a role position recognized by society.
Even as things change, the ideas that remain are still rampant.
Teacher Wang Hong, who was entangled in this spiritual world conflict, was depressed.
It's just that different people treat conflict in very different ways. Some people will choose to compromise, back down, and even depression in the conflict, and the powerful choice is expressed in anger, but it is only anger, from anger to anger, to anger, to anger, and that's all.
In my opinion, the valuable thing about Teacher Wang Hong is that she is an activist and has the powerful power to directly and quickly sublimate conflicts into concrete actions.
"In addition to my own efforts to break free from the constraints of fate, what can I do more for the female compatriots around me?" 」
After graduating from college, she left her hometown and went to Beijing alone to develop.
After experiencing the ups and downs of the early years of her career, she benefited from the status of consulting clients, so she directly participated in the study to become a career planner, and then went overseas as a volunteer for 18 months, experiencing the customs and customs of the world, she returned to her motherland again to support confused Chinese professional women in the form of career counseling.
▲The first on the left is Teacher Wang Hong
But at this time, Wang Hong, who has traveled to more than 20 countries, has become more and more free in her inner spirit, and she can no longer accommodate the meetings and social gatherings in the workplace from time to time, and a more autonomous way of working is about to come out.
So, at the age of 36, on Women's Day, she became an independent counselor.
I also submitted my resignation report to the unit on The 36-year-old Women's Day and became an independent consultant, which was a day I deliberately chose. When I found out that Teacher Wang Hong was also on this day, I felt that it was a coincidence.
But she told me that it wasn't something she did on purpose, but that just when she finished her resignation and started working independently, she found out that it was March 8th.
Perhaps, inadvertently embarking on a new life journey on this day, which is called the "United Nations Women's Rights and International Day of Peace", also has the deep meaning of the universe for a woman who is committed to supporting women's growth.
As an independent consultant, Teacher Wang Hong could have lived easily, happily and richly on her own, but the model of "in addition to doing a good job myself, I can also do more for the female compatriots in this land" is eager to try in her heart.
After consulting thousands of women's groups, international students, and overseas Chinese customers in various provinces of China, As well as Hong Kong, the United Kingdom, the United States, New Zealand, etc., in order to continuously, effectively and deeply support the growth of women.
In October 2017, she created the first women's career growth public welfare group matrix in China, supporting more than 3,000 women to grow up online in a variety of ways.
In June 2018, in order to provide more focused "immersion companionship", she established the annual Women's Career Growth Class of Nandin. In this project, a total of more than 440 women have completed courses in several modules such as self-exploration, relationship building, career planning, industry analysis, overseas development, entrepreneurship and freelance, and their internal mentality and way of thinking have been deeply advanced.
At the end of 2018, Ms. Wang Hong launched her first career planning book "Awakening: Design Life to Be what You Want", combining personal growth experience and years of consulting experience, in the form of case analysis to explore a number of hot topics in the workplace, inspiring thousands of readers to awaken from confusion and confusion.
▲ "Awakening" Shanghai signing party
"In addition to serving customers, what else can I do to consult about the development of the industry?"
In September 2017, Ms. Wang Hong opened a supervision class. It aims to provide case studies for novice consultants and improve their consulting skills. She said she was also a novice consultant and went through a difficult initial stage;
In March 2019, the first basic class for training career planners was launched. "Only when more people become professionals in the field of career consulting can the industry flourish and flourish." Teacher Wang Hong has been working hard to promote the development of the consulting industry.
In October 2019, the "Torch Career" commercial brand of Ms. Wang Hong's consulting team was officially established. From the "flame" of one person to the "torch" of a group of people gathering, this marks the ignition of life with love and professionalism, and also means the maturity of Wang Hong's consulting team.
In May 2020, the "Women's Awakening Academy" under "Torch Career" was established. The original intention was to use the professional strength of torch career counselors to support ordinary Chinese women to become independent and awakened women."
"Supporting ordinary women to become independent women" is one of the three visions of the "Torch Career". In addition, Torch Career is also committed to supporting independent women to become professional women (counselor training) and professional women to become leaders (female entrepreneurship, leadership, and influence development).
……
This road of career development and personal growth, I only heard about it in the early days, and I have witnessed participation in the recent past.
I met Ms. Wang Hong in early March 2019, when I had been working in the news industry for 14 years and was ready to leave and devote myself to the psychological counseling industry for several years.
In the first consultation, just after the two of us had finished greeting each other, I asked straight away: "Teacher Wang Hong, can I resign on March 8?" ”
I thought it was just a catharsis of my own thoughts of leaving, and the consultant would have given me an open-ended suggestion after doing some analysis for me.
Unexpectedly, Teacher Wang Hong cheerfully gave me a word: "Yes!" ”
Yikes! And such a painful consultation.
So I submitted my resignation a few days later, on March 8.
Subsequently, Teacher Wang Hong suggested that I study career planning, at that time, in order to expand the content of my consulting business, I participated in the study, who ever thought, but uncontrollably followed her to the present.
From consulting clients to trainees to business partners... In addition to thousands of consulting clients, there are hundreds of female counselors like me who are deeply supported by Ms. Wang Hong and have changed the trajectory of their lives:
She changed from a civil engineer to a voluntary filling industry for the college entrance examination, and then made a bold move in the field of academic planning and psychological counseling;
She has experienced interior designers - Internet industry sales executives - homestay managers - food industry and other fields of entrepreneurship, and now she is doing a smooth job in the consulting pre-sales position;
She has been engaged in human resources and management in chemical, textile, automotive, trade and other industries, with engineering, HR, psychology and MBA background, and now she is engaged in management work in the consulting industry;
She has worked in state-owned enterprises and government departments for more than ten years, and now focuses on career planning for college students;
There's a lot of her, she, she...
▲ "Awakening" Shenzhen signing party, teacher Wang Hong and "she" hugged
"She," which we use today, is actually just 100 years old.
"She" was born during the May Fourth Movement. Liu Bannong, a pioneer of China's new cultural movement, used the word "she" for the first time in his "Teach Me How Not to Want Her" in 1920 when he studied at the University of London in the United Kingdom, which was praised and supported by the vast number of literati and was rapidly popularized.
At this point, "she" has stepped onto the stage of history. Women have been able to develop a new identity that transcends kinship and traditional patriarchal ideologies to define their social roles.
"She" became a symbolic symbol of the advocacy of equality between men and women at that time, and also a concept that people in the era of women's consciousness just awakened to wait to be developed and completed.
I think that in the face of the sublimation of the inner conflict brought about by the shackles of culture, Teacher Wang Hong has achieved herself, supported others, promoted the industry, and updated the culture...
All of this is the best development of "her" by the career planners of this era. It is also a life-to-life deal with the big picture of internal conflict.
At the end of the interview, I asked Teacher Wang Hong: "How do you now view this conflict that lasted for the first 40 years of your life?" ”
She told me: "I think it was this conflict that drove me forward, and sometimes I can still feel her deeply. Now I've also found a better way to transcend conflict — to amplify the vision: to support each living individual with love — no matter what country, ethnicity, or color she comes from. The overseas business that follows from the 'Torch Career' is also the realization of this vision. ”
Transcending cultural and geographical restrictions, transcending conflict while achieving a better self, behind all this is the support of love - from the small love of the individual, gradually expanding to a deeper love for the nation, for the female group, for the world and the whole earth.
Those who love to come out love to return.
I am convinced that those who love this world so deeply must also be deeply loved by the world.
Happy birthday, bold and frank woman! We love you!
Torch career, ignite life with love and professionalism!
The author of this article is Zhao Xin
Torch Career Career Planner
Counselor
Advanced emotional coaching
He is a member of the Chinese Mental Health Association
【Experience】
14 years of provincial news media work experience, senior chief reporter title.
Traveling south and north, seeing a wide range of knowledge, witnessing the occurrence and development of many news events, starting and closing, and deeply understanding the laws of the world; dealing with all levels, industries and departments of society all year round, with rich social experience, diversified world outlook, three-dimensional outlook on life, and broad values.
8 years of training and teaching experience in provincial government departments, 11 times won the "Fujian Journalism Award", and other provincial news business awards.
At the age of 33, he began to transform into the consulting industry, engaged in career planning and psychological counseling, and is an explorer, practitioner and supporter of the transformation of women in middle age.
【Areas of Expertise】
He has rich experience in case counseling and group teaching, and is good at supporting young people to find career direction, career transformation of middle-aged people, interpersonal troubles in the workplace, emotional and interpersonal problems, women's personal growth, and anxiety before the high school entrance examination.
【Consulting style】
Focus on the problem quickly, the consultation idea is clear, good at analyzing the problem, promoting the deep awareness of the consultant, and getting out of the fog.