"Mom, can I have a drink?"
When you are asked this by your child, do you categorically refuse, or can you not withstand soft and hard bubble compromise?
Seeing a super cute little girl, holding a bottle of "happy water", asking her mother with pitiful eyes: "Can I take a sip?" ”
After speaking, she began to sell cute performances, cautiously tempted, and after seeing her mother's "instant change of face", she pouted to express her grievances and unwillingness.
That cute look is really hard to refuse!
Then again, when summer comes, how many children can completely resist the temptation of drinking?
Coke, Sprite, sparkling water, all kinds of juices and fancy ice drinks, all of which can double the happiness.
So, when the child asks us with begging eyes: "Mom, can I have a drink?" ”
What exactly are we going to do?
Part.1
To solve this problem, first of all, we have to clarify one thing: can children drink drinks?
Let's start with the conclusion: you can drink it properly.
This sentence contains two meanings
It cannot be drunk as plain water;
It is not necessary to completely eliminate it.
Children drink excessive drinks for a long time, the harm should not be underestimated.
According to the recommendations of the Dietary Guidelines for Chinese Residents:
The daily intake of added sugars per person should not exceed 50g, it is best to limit it to 25g, and children should not exceed 12g.
And many drinks, especially carbonated drinks, are high in sugar, as well as pigments and additives, excessive intake, naturally harmful to the child's body.
Several common drinks on the market are high in sugar.
There is such a popular science experiment, various drinks are poured into tin foil containers, and sugar is boiled over a fire.
Weighing Discovery:
cola contains sugar 46g;
pulsating sugar 31 g;
75 g of lactic acid bacteria sugar content;
Fresh orange contains more sugar 56g;
Rock sugar snow pear sugar 65g...
CCTV also did a similar experiment, condensing different drinks into lollipops.
The result is -
Iced tea: three
Orange juice: 1 stick
Milk tea: a lump
Rock sugar pear: four
Coca-Cola: Three roots
Children who drink drinks for a long time will consume excessive amounts of sugar, coloring and additives.
Over time, it is easy to cause dental caries, obesity, irritability, myopia, and may also induce diabetes, and even cause precocious puberty.
Since there are so many harms, then it is strictly prohibited, right?
Beware of backfire!
There is a word in psychology called "scarcity", the more you can't get it, the more you want it.
In childhood, those needs that are not met or even strictly forbidden may become a black hole in the child's heart, and no matter how it is filled in the next life, it cannot be filled.
A colleague used to restrict his drinks too strictly when he was a child, but now he has grown up and never drank plain water and drinks a variety of drinks every day.
He also knew that drinking like this hurt his body, but he couldn't control his inner desires.
On a hot summer day, taking a sip of a cold and refreshing drink is a normal desire for a child.
Teacher Yin Jianli said:
Stifling the child's small desires will lead to the child's extreme desire for something and produce a compensatory psychology.
Desire can only be loosened, not blocked.
Part.2
The next focus is on how to solve the problem of "can I drink a drink?"
To solve this problem, you can go in two steps.
Step 1:
In normal times, make rules with your child
Usually popularize the sugar content of each drink with children, and the disadvantages of drinking more drinks.
Then, the child sets the rules together.
Depending on the age of the child, the standard of "moderation" is also different.
Under 3 years old:
It is best not to give it to your child, but if your child really wants to, you can pour the drink into the lid and let your child taste a little.
3-6 years:
You can agree with your child on the amount to drink, if it is 500ml, you can let your child drink 1/3.
6-12 years old:
You can let your child drink half at a time, which is 250ml.
After age 12:
You can drink one bottle at a time, but not every day.
It can also be specified according to the time period, such as:
Only one drink per week.
Within this rule, give the child enough autonomy to choose.
You decide what you want to drink, and you can drink it on any day you want.
Occasionally, you can also cooperate with your child.
Let him drink half a bottle of Sprite today, let him drink half a bottle of juice tomorrow.
The other half of the bottle, if my mother is afraid of fat, I will give it to my father.
Step 2:
How to answer your child's questions in the moment
If the child needs to be within the agreed range, you may wish to simply give it to the child to drink.
If it is beyond the scope of the agreement, how can you refuse the child's request without hurting his heart?
First of all, understand and respect the child's feelings, and do not rudely refuse.
Children like to drink sweet drinks, this is by nature.
It is also normal for children to be young and lack self-control.
Do not come up and rudely refuse the child, or even belittle the child for not keeping promises, this will only cause the child to resist and resist.
We can first express understanding and empathy:
"Mom knows you'd love to drink it right now, right? When you are tired and thirsty, take a sip of your favorite drink, it is simply not too refreshing. ”
Explain why:
"But your amount this week is full, you drink too much, the harm of excess you know, mom doesn't want you to become stupid, stupid, short-sighted, and mom also knows that you are a trustworthy child." You insist on waiting two more days and you can drink. ”
Second, in the face of your child's crying, do not compromise.
What if your child is crying and wants to drink?
The answer is: hold on and don't compromise.
Professor Li Meijin once said:
Some personalities in this life must be restrained, and they are not cultivated to be willful, repressed, impulsive, selfish, and unable to tolerate failure.
If the child cries and the adult compromises, the loss is not only the child's physical health, but also the child's character defects.
We need to teach children to express their needs in a rational way, so that he understands:
Even if the needs are not met, crying will not help.
Third, appropriately relax the psychological threshold.
The child is a thoughtful independent individual, and not a robot, how can it be carried out according to the program we have set?
It is better to set a range of allowable occurrences, which is the "N+1" principle.
Within this scope and principle, children are allowed to "go out of line".
For example, children sometimes just wonder what a drink tastes like.
That gives him a bite or two to satisfy his curiosity.
On a special holiday, if the child drinks an extra drink, it will not be good.
Fourth, think backwards and do the opposite.
This trick is only suitable for dealing with young, easy to fool little babies, focusing on a "psychological warfare".
For example: catch the child's psychology of "the more he is not allowed to eat, the more he wants to eat, the more he is allowed to eat, the less he wants to eat".
I watched a video some time ago, the father passed the drink to the child's mouth, told him that the drink was bitter, and let him drink it.
As a result, the little boy said not to drink anything
Another example is to grasp the psychology of "girls love beauty and are afraid of becoming fat".
In order to stop his 3-year-old daughter from indulging in Coke, the old father took painstaking efforts.
He uses his daughter's favorite Ultraman as a demonstration, telling her that Ultraman drank Coke and woke up the next day "fattening."
In fact, he secretly changed to a large Ultraman early the next morning.
The weight gain effect was so amazing that the child said he would never drink Coke again.
Part.3
In fact, whether it is a drink or a snack, we only need to abide by a "two eight principle".
80% of the child's diet is healthy and nutritious, and at most 20% is not healthy enough and not nutritious enough.
In this way, the child's needs can be met in an appropriate amount, and the child's body will not be harmed.
In addition, there are two points to note:
First, parents should lead by example.
While telling the child that drinking drinks is not good, he also drinks drinks as water every day.
This will make children question their parents' words and prestige, and even think that either the drink is bad or that parents do not want them to drink it.
So, try not to drink in front of your child.
The second is to choose relatively healthy drinks.
Choosing a relatively "healthy" drink for your child is:
1. No additives or few additives
2. The sugar content should not be too high
3. Try to be as fresh as possible
Pure milk and sugar-free yogurt aside, other relatively healthy drinks are:
Pure coconut water, honey lemon tea, freshly squeezed fruit and vegetable juice (can't drink more), homemade mung bean soup, homemade milk tea (milk + tea)...
In short, while protecting the child's body, don't forget to take care of the child's inner needs.
I hope today's sharing will be helpful to the girls,
If you think you've gained something,
Just share it with my sisters,
Let's learn and grow together!