Is longevity really a good thing?
Yesterday morning, I received a call from a cousin saying that an elder from his hometown was sick and was living in the city hospital.
My cousin and I have a good relationship. I called and told me that my elder was sick and was in the hospital, which was a favor.
Although I am a bit of an unusual, I am often puzzled by my outrageous words. But I still understand human relations.
After hanging up my cousin's phone, I rode to the hospital to visit the sick elder, and on the way, I withdrew a few hundred yuan. Now when visiting patients, instead of carrying some fruits and supplements as before, the emphasis is on giving cash directly.
When I arrived at the hospital, I found the ward according to the room number given by my cousin, knocked on the door gently, and the door was opened by the son of the elder who was sick and hospitalized, about 50 years old. The face was haggard, and there was no expression on the tired face.
He should call me cousin. When I entered the door, I saw the sick elder lying on the bed, with a needle stuck in his wrist and a bottle hanging from it. His eyes were slightly closed, and his thin and almost fleshy face made people look a little frightened.
I tried to walk over and say a word to the elders. The cousin shook his head. I whispered if I was asleep?
The cousin shook his head again, saying that he had been like this all the time and had never woken up.
My cousin asked me to sit on the side, and he sat on the edge of the bed with his hands on his hand.
How long has it been? I asked my cousin.
My cousin said it would be half a month. It's been like this, saying that the brain can't work, and even if you wake up, you're still in a vegetative state.
My cousin is a wooden man who doesn't talk much.
How many days are you staying? I asked.
Stayed for half a month. I asked, and my cousin replied to me.
The cousin's face was expressionless, like a wooden man.
The elders on the hospital bed were silent and lay quietly.
The elder is just over 70 years old this year, and he is not too old. In my hometown, when the plywood factory was booming, he also set up a factory, caught up with the good times, and earned a family business. I occasionally went back to the village and heard rumors about this elder many times, saying how much money he had earned and became a figure in the village.
Looking at the elders lying on the hospital bed, my eyes seemed to appear in front of me when he was in the limelight, and now, lying alone on the hospital bed, unconscious.
I had a lot of thoughts in my mind, but I knew I couldn't tell my cousin. My cousin has been living in his hometown in the countryside, and his mind should be full of filial piety and loyalty, and if I tell him my thoughts, I am afraid that he will immediately do something with me.
I took out 500 yuan and put it next to my bedside and told my cousin to buy some food for the elders. My cousin panicked, picked up the money I had put next to the bed, and said no. Pushing around, there is something urgent.
I'm here to visit the sick, it's courtesy. How can you get back what you sent out?
When I came out of the hospital and rode home, my mind was full of the thin, almost fleshy face of the elder lying on the hospital bed, with skin and bones, like a skeleton.
At that time, I wanted to persuade my cousin to swallow it back, but if there was no hope, he should give up on treatment. The cousin is a figure under traditional etiquette, and he can't understand it.
I thought about myself. What if I were to be like this in the future, unconscious, lying on a hospital bed, with tubes all over my body, and the cost of treatment flowing into the hospital's account room?
While riding the bike, I thought about the near future, I am 53 years old this year, and I may have an accident at any time.
Riding a bicycle, passing by a supermarket, I saw that it was noon, and I had to cook for my daughter-in-law. I parked the car and went into the supermarket.
I bought a few kinds of vegetables, and saw that there was a seller of salted duck in Nanjing, and my daughter-in-law was from Nanjing, so I bought her half a salted duck. Pushing the cart, ready to go to the checkout, I walked through the wine area and saw a beautiful bottle, which was plum wine. This is also what the daughter-in-law likes, the bottle is beautiful, and the wine is also suitable for the occasion, so I bought a bottle for the daughter-in-law.
I just want to make my daughter-in-law happy now. A bottle of plum wine and half a salted duck cost a little one hundred. I don't feel distressed, as long as I can make my daughter-in-law smile, even if she wants my life, I will not hesitate to give it to her immediately.
When I got home, my daughter-in-law was still upstairs reading her comparative literature, and she knew that I would definitely come back to cook, and as long as I was at home, she would become a grandmother.
The rice was steamed first, two greens were stir-fried, the salted duck was served on a beautiful plate, and the plum wine was also placed on the table. Then I asked my daughter-in-law to go downstairs.
She came down from the upstairs in a dignified manner, and when she saw the saltwater duck on the table, she smiled with a small face. When I saw the plum wine again, my smile became a flower.
Seeing my daughter-in-law happy, I am also happy.
She is the love of my life, and I am the life of hers. Having a lover, guarding a home, three meals and four seasons, spring, summer, autumn and winter, depending on each other, I think this is happiness.
Happiness is at this time, and I know to cherish it.
My daughter-in-law didn't ask me about visiting the patient. She's a smart and transparent person, and she's more open than I thought.
People will grow old one day, and there is no need to be afraid, let alone worry. Just live your present life well.
After lunch, my daughter-in-law came and went upstairs and left. I finished cleaning up the table and went into the study with a cup of tea.
As I drank my tea, I remembered the skeletal face lying on the hospital bed. I speculate that my cousin's heart, I am not a good person, and I think my cousin's heart also hopes that his father, the father who is lying in the hospital bed, has no life, can leave sooner. He was just afraid of other people's discussions, afraid that some people would say that he was unfilial, so he did not hesitate to put his father on the hospital bed. I know there is no hope, but I have to do it.
The cousin has no way, filial piety is the reputation he needs.
Will I be like this in the future?
I don't want that.
When you are born, you should go, when you go, you can come and go freely.
I hope that if I really lose my ability to take care of myself one day, I ask my daughter-in-law and children to give up treatment.
If I find out that I am seriously ill, the kind that is almost incurable, I will not go to the hospital again. I will choose the way I like to leave this world that I love.
Let me go with dignity is my explanation to my daughter-in-law and children.
I'm not pessimistic, I'm an optimistic person, and I love this beautiful world.
When that day comes, I will choose to travel. I have so many places I like to visit, and I want to spend the rest of my life going to the south of the Yangtze River to see the fine willows like smoke, to the outside of the plug to see the lonely smoke and the sunset, and to the beach to see the beautiful scenery in summer, you know.
Then go to find a mountain and a river, find a place, and spend your old age in peace.