The wisdom of Gen-la Hongyi: Avoid the emotional trap of self-emotion
In the bustling world, we crave sincere feelings and connect with the hearts of others. However, as Venerable Hongyi said, "Don't be moved by yourself in any relationship. This sentence is like a wake-up call, reminding us to stay sober on the road of feelings and avoid falling into the trap of self-touching.
Everyone has a pure land in their hearts, which is the yearning and pursuit of beautiful feelings. When we invest in a relationship, we tend to give it all in, even at the expense of ourselves. However, this kind of unreserved dedication sometimes leads us to fall into the mistake of being self-touched. We mistakenly think that our efforts can move the other person and make the relationship deeper. But this is often not the case, and over-giving can make the other person feel pressured or even have the urge to run away.
In the world of self-emotion, we often ignore the objective judgment of feelings. We focus too much on our own feelings and ignore what the other person really thinks. We are immersed in the romantic fantasy of self-weaving, but we forget the cruelty of reality. This blind devotion to feelings often leads us to failure without realizing it.
To avoid the trap of self-emotion, we must first learn to remain calm. On the path of feelings, we need to keep a clear head at all times and not be swayed by passions and impulses. We should look at feelings with a rational eye and analyze the other person's behavior and thoughts with an objective attitude. Only in this way can we avoid sinking deeper and deeper into the mire of feelings.
Second, we need to learn to listen. True affection is based on mutual understanding and respect. We need to learn to listen to each other and understand their true thoughts and feelings. Only when we really get to know each other can we find the best way to get along with each other. At the same time, we must also learn to express our feelings and needs, so that the other person can understand our inner world.
Furthermore, we need to learn to give in moderation. The emotional giving should be mutual, not one-sided. We can't blindly give without expecting anything in return, nor can we ask the other party to give for us unconditionally. We need to find a balance in the emotional giving, so that each other can feel the warmth and love of each other. Only in this way can we build a truly solid emotional foundation.
In addition, we have to learn to let go. Sometimes, we invest so much time and energy in a relationship that we can't help ourselves. When the relationship comes to an end, we must learn to let go of the past and face the future bravely. We need to believe in the power of time and let time heal our wounds. At the same time, we must also learn to cherish the people in front of us and not let the shadow of the past affect our feelings with others.
Finally, we should remember this sentence from Venerable Hongyi: "Don't be moved by yourself in any relationship." "It's a reminder and a warning to us. Let us stay sober and rational on the road of feelings, and use wisdom and courage to pursue happiness and beauty that truly belong to us.
In conclusion, feelings are an integral part of life. We must cherish every relationship and manage it with sincerity and enthusiasm. But at the same time, we must avoid falling into the trap of self-emotion. We must learn to look at feelings with a rational eye and analyze each other's behaviors and thoughts with an objective attitude. Only in this way can we go further, more stable, and happier on the road of feelings.