It is often said that thirty is standing. But I never really felt the meaning of "standing" until I really crossed the threshold of 30 years old. Until then, I had always lived in the expectations of others, trying to play one role after another—daughter, wife, mother, and a busy member of society. But one day after I turned thirty, I suddenly realized that beyond these identities, I was first and foremost myself.
It was a sunny weekend, and I spent it as usual with busy chores and the laughter of my children. Suddenly, a phone call broke the peace.
It was my college friend Xiao Yun, whom I hadn't seen for a long time, and she invited me to a party at an Internet celebrity check-in point. I hesitated for a moment and declined her invitation.
It's not because I don't want to go, but I suddenly realize that I don't need those outside recognition and pursuit anymore.
After hanging up, I strolled alone through the park near the neighborhood. Sunlight shines through the gaps in the leaves and shines on the ground, creating dappled light and shadows.
I stopped, closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. At that moment, I could hear my own heartbeat, and it was a kind of peace and ease that I had not felt in a long time.
I began to wonder how much of my true self had I lost over the years to meet the expectations and eyes of others.
How much effort and sacrifice did I put into playing each role well? And now, I want to get back to that true self, the one who has the courage to face everything and the strength to pursue my dreams.
I decided that I was going to go on my own trip. It's not about looking for those influencer check-in spots, but going to the places that my heart really yearns for.
I brought my camera and recorded the scenery and mood along the way. Every scenery has its own unique beauty, just like everyone has his own unique charm. I began to appreciate this beauty, and I began to appreciate myself.
In the process, I met a lot of people and things. Once, I met an old man in a small shop.
He looked at the camera in my hand and asked me with a smile, "Little girl, are you here for a tour?" I shook my head and told him, "I'm here to find myself." The old man laughed, and said, "You're already on your way, aren't you?" "At that moment, I seemed to understand something.
I'm starting to cherish my time with my family even more. I began to learn to listen to them and care about their feelings.
I realized that as a daughter, wife, and mother, my responsibility was not only to take care of them, but also to make them feel loved and cared for.
I started trying to be a better version of myself, not only for myself, but for them.
At the same time, I also started to pursue my dreams. I signed up for a photography course to learn how to better capture life's beautiful moments.
I volunteered to help those in need in my own way. I find that when I work hard for my dreams and beliefs, my heart is filled with satisfaction and joy.
In the process, I also encountered some doubts and ridicule. Some people don't understand my choices and actions, and think I'm escaping reality or being irresponsible.
But I didn't care about these voices, because I knew that only I could decide my own path in life and how I would be happy.
Now I am no longer the confused and restless self. I have found my own direction and purpose, as well as my own happiness and fulfillment.
I know what I'm worth and what I want. I am no longer swayed by the eyes and words of the outside world, and I no longer lose myself to meet the expectations of others.
Now, whenever I stand in front of the mirror and look at myself, I smile and say to myself, "You are you, you are unique".
No matter how old you are, no matter what role you are in, you have to be brave enough to be yourself and live your own wonderful and charming. Because there is only one you in this world, and there is only one unique you.