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In the long river of years, we gradually move from the vigor of youth to the tranquility and depth of old age. As the twilight of life dawns, we begin to re-examine the true meaning of life and find ways to protect our hearts and tranquility. What is unexpected is that the seemingly indifferent word "thin affection" may become a shield for our later life.
"Thin affection", at first glance, seems to run counter to the deep friendship we have always advocated. But in the context of later years, it has a different kind of deep meaning. The thin affection here does not refer to the abandonment and indifference to family, friendship and love, but a kind of transparency and indifference after a thousand sails, and a kind of wisdom that knows how to reserve space and energy for oneself.
In old age, people's physical functions gradually decline, and their energy is not as good as before. In the past, we may have spent a lot of energy for work, for family, and for social interaction. We try to meet the expectations of others, and we are afraid that rejection will hurt the feelings of others, so we constantly wronged ourselves. However, in old age, we should understand that what really matters is our own feelings and needs. To learn to be affectionate is to learn to reject those meaningless social activities and cumbersome human feelings. No more going to those parties that exhaust you for the sake of face, no longer forcing yourself to do things you don't want to do for the sake of other people's eyes. Give yourself more time and space to do things that really make you happy and fulfilled, such as reading a book, going for a walk, and spending time with friends who are truly close to you.
First of all, there is "affection" for success. Looking back, perhaps we have worked hard in our careers and aspired to achieve fame in order to prove our worth. However, in old age, people should learn to look down on the glory and achievements of the past. Those honors and titles are just a temporary embellishment on the road of life. Excessive attachment to past successes will only make the mind tired of vanity. Let go of the greed for success and understand that the value of life is not measured by external achievements alone. The tranquility and inner peace of life in his later years are far better than the hustle and bustle and glitz of the past. We can recall the struggles of the past, but we should not let them become shackles to the present, and we can enjoy true tranquility and freedom by looking at the past achievements with an indifferent heart.
Secondly, "indifference" to social circles. When we were young, we were keen to make friends extensively, participate in various social events, and try to fit into different circles. But as I get older, I don't have enough energy to sustain a large and complex social network. At this point, the social circle needs to be filtered and streamlined. For those social relationships that are superficially entertaining and hypocritical, we should learn to be "affectionate". No more forcing yourself to attend meaningless meetings in order to cater to others, and no longer bothering to maintain some insincere relationships. Leave time and affection to friends who truly know each other and can bring warmth and support. Cutting back on unnecessary socializing not only reduces the burden on our body and mind, but also allows us to focus more on our inner needs and enjoy truly high-quality interpersonal interactions.
Moreover, he is overly worried about his children. As a parent, it is natural to love your children, but in old age, you must learn to let go moderately. Children have grown up and have their own lifestyles and choices. Excessive worry and intervention may not only lead to parent-child conflicts, but also cause endless anxiety. Believe that they have the ability to face life's challenges and difficulties, and give them enough space to grow and be independent. "Thin love" is not love, but a deeper love, which is to let children soar in the free sky, and at the same time free themselves from excessive worries and enjoy their own relaxing time.
Then, the obsession with the heart is "thin". Everyone may have some unrealized dreams or goals in their hearts, but in their old age, they should recognize the reality and learn to let go of those unrealistic obsessions. If you keep clinging to your unattainable wishes, you will only lead to pain and unwillingness. For example, a certain material wealth that has always been desired, or a social status that has been pursued but never achieved. Let go of these obsessions, accept the imperfections of life, and cherish what you already have, so that your soul can be liberated and you can meet every day of your later life with a more peaceful mind.
Finally, the regret of the past is "thin". There will inevitably be regrets in life, those missed opportunities, lost lovers, and mistakes made may become pain points in the heart. But drowning in the regrets of the past will not change the past, and will only make the present and the future bleak. Learn to treat these regrets with "gracie" and treat them as part of your life experience, rather than as a heavy baggage. Look forward with a positive mindset and believe that every experience has meaning and value, and even regrets can be a source of growth and wisdom for us.
When people reach old age, learning to be affectionate is a strategy for self-protection, and it is a redefinition and choice of life. It allows us to face the second half of life more calmly, protect our inner peace and tranquility, and welcome the sunrise and sunset of each day with a more relaxed and comfortable attitude. Under the coat of affection, what we harvest is a firmness and calmness from the depths of our hearts, which makes our later life bloom with a different kind of brilliance.
Author: Lao Pang
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