Let's think back to the beginning, at the beginning of the marriage, everyone was full of expectations for the life of the two people.
However, married life is not as beautiful as a fairy tale, and even if it is a fairy tale, it ends when it is written that the prince and princess live happily ever after.
Because after getting married, life is often a piece of chicken feathers.
So, how should husband and wife get along with each other so that this relationship can last for a long time and be as warm as ever?
In fact, if you want the teacher to say, the answer is not complicated, and the core is one sentence:
To be able to do this, it really shouldn't be too simple to make men want to stop.
The underlying psychology behind this is what teachers often talk about "emotional value".
Don't worry, before watching my analysis, hurry up and like, follow, and share it with your friends.
1. Share when you are happy
Imagine when you finally get the job done and get recognized by your colleagues and leaders.
Or, your child has achieved excellent grades in school and the teacher has recognized you for your work.
Is that joy from the inside out the desire to share it with those closest to you for the first time?
Of course, this kind of sharing is not stepping on one by one, don't say something like "The teacher affirms my credit, unlike you who don't do anything." ”
Sharing joy is not only an emotional exchange, but also a glue that deepens the emotional bond between each other.
Just like me, every time I help students get out of the current troubles and get everyone's gratitude.
will share it with your teacher as soon as possible.
It's the value of my work, so I want to be recognized by the people I love the most.
She doesn't have to praise me every time, sometimes it's just a look of affirmation, or just a thumbs up, and I'm very satisfied, it's a transfer of love and energy between us.
You know, emotions are contagious, and providing emotional value not only requires you to praise and obey all the time, but sometimes just sharing your joy is a good emotional value.
Ordinary people's lives are like boiled water, and sharing joy is adding a little honey to a cup.
2. Express when angry
In fact, many teachers will not talk to you about what to do if you are angry.
But in our married life, we will inevitably encounter friction and disputes.
The teacher knows that when everyone is emotional, they will not be very rational, and they may say hurtful things and regret things.
This is very normal, don't feel guilty because of this, people are not machines, shouldn't they have emotions?
But the teacher has a small suggestion here, and that is to express why you are angry.
To take the simplest example, everyone looks at the little girls in those idol dramas, and they are obviously angry.
But the opening is "I'm not angry, I'm fine, I'm fine".
Don't talk about men, even if you sit in front of the TV by yourself, you can't wait to scold.
So, ah, be sure to express it.
"Why did you agree to buy a bag and not buy it", "Why did you promise to go out and not go"
It's all okay, and expressing anger is also emphasizing your bottom line, and it's also a kind of communication.
First of all, don't dare to express anger, the so-called patience and accommodation, in fact, is a kind of internal friction, and there will always be an outbreak in the end, and then it may be difficult to recover.
Then, make your anger specific to things, after all, the teacher knows that the ultimate goal of your tantrum is to hope that the other party will correct it.
Tell things out, whether the other party understands it or not, you can't pretend to be stupid at this time, so many times, you must not only give positive emotional value, but also learn to give negative emotional value.
Then some students may want to say, "Will it be too much to give negative emotions, will it intensify the conflict?"
Don't worry, keep looking.
3. Understand when you are sad
Nine times out of ten, life is not as expected, and every family will encounter a low point.
As a partner, understanding and support at this time is crucial, but in a variety of ways.
Let's continue with the example above.
This is actually a case of one of my students, she just didn't dare to express her anger before, she was patient and tolerant of everything, and she held out all her nodules.
The student's husband belongs to the kind of person who loves to draw big cakes, and often says that he will buy you a bag next month and take you out to play or something, but the situation at home is not particularly good for a while, so she is even more afraid to get angry.
But I will tell her to express her anger, there is no need to swallow it because something happened at home, but when you say it, vent your emotions, and finally be sure to put it to an end.
What is a good finish? Very simple.
In this paragraph, there is affirmation and understanding, which not only expresses his bottom line, but also gives the other party a step, believe the teacher, this passage will not intensify the contradiction.
Because in the final analysis, it's also understanding and support, isn't it incredible.
The teacher told the students that there are even times when this kind of serious expression is more realistic in the eyes of men.
Do you think, you understand and support him when you scold him, and you usually don't have the same heart with him?
Fourth, praise when it is bland
Most of the time of married life is uneventful, and truly happy couples are the ones who are able to live these ordinary days.
In fact, teachers can share a little secret with you with their own examples.
That is, finding the shining point of the other party in the ordinary and giving sincere praise is an important secret to keeping love fresh.
For example, your teacher, Xiaoqian, often praises me when she has nothing to do, which makes me sometimes very annoying and tired at work, but I feel full of energy all of a sudden.
And she is very skillful in praising people, in her words, "sincere eyes + specific details".
Just like once, because of a little thing in the company, I felt very tricky, and I might be a little irritable when I got home, at this time, Teacher Xiaoqian suddenly looked into my eyes and said, "Husband, I think your blue tie with a gray suit today is really suitable, and I feel a little handsome, I really deserve to be my husband, with taste." ”
Actually, I took this tie in the morning, but does it matter?
The negative emotions in my heart at that time disappeared at once, and the smile on the corner of my mouth could not be controlled at all.
Therefore, even if it is a very ordinary day, a small detail, as long as you are willing to praise each other, you will definitely make an ordinary day enjoyable.
A happy marriage is never accidental, but the result of the joint efforts of both parties.
Isn't it very simple to make a man want to stop.
If you want to know more methods and skills, please leave a message in the comment area, or send a private message to the teacher to receive the "Attractive Woman Improvement Class" for free.