Hello, I'm Yang Xiaoqian. A post-80s generation who focuses on personal growth and mental improvement
-
If life is a necklace, family affection is the most dazzling jewel on this necklace.
However, many people do not cherish it, let the pearl be dusty, and ignore the management of family affection.
In a family, the disharmony between siblings will not only affect everyone's happiness, but also affect the development of a family.
Siblings have a discordant relationship and no longer communicate with each other, most of which are inseparable from the following reasons.
01, the parents had a bowl of water and provoked the relationship
I have a high school classmate who has always had a very good relationship with me since I joined the workforce.
She was very envious of my relationship with my parents, saying that her parents only saw their son in their eyes and did not like her.
From childhood to adulthood, she could see her mother's preference for her brother, and she had a disgusting and indifferent attitude towards her.
My brother was not admitted to college, and my mother spent a lot of money to let my brother go to school. She was admitted to a good university, but her mother only allowed her to go to a local university, which cost less and had low tuition fees.
When he got married, he was even more eccentric, and his brother gave the house and the car, and gave the woman a large dowry.
When she came here, she didn't have a penny of dowry, but she asked for a bride price of 200,000 yuan, and she deducted it, which made her feel cold.
Later, she and her brother rarely interacted and rarely returned to their parents' home.
Because she is often not treated, she doesn't want to be close to her mother's family.
Sibling discord is largely due to parents.
Parents who are too partial will cause dissatisfaction among their children, and it is easier to have estrangement and disputes between them, and it is difficult to maintain the development of family affection.
I have seen a netizen issue such a sentence: "Parental eccentricity is born and will last for a lifetime, and it will never change, and when you live to middle age, this shadow will gradually get better, now that you understand it, love yourself well!" ”
Parents are too partial, which leads to a discordant relationship with the children.
Parents give preference to other siblings, resulting in resentment towards the one who is not loved, and cannot feel the beauty of family affection.
02. For the sake of the family's property, no one is willing to be humble
Qiao Yicheng in "Children of the Qiao Family" envied Qi Weimin for having a good father when he was young.
After many years, Qi Weimin envied Qiao Yicheng's sensible younger brothers and sisters.
When Qiao Yicheng was sick, his younger brothers and sisters took turns to take care of him, contributing money and efforts, and no one flinched.
He wants to change his kidney, and everyone goes to match, even the youngest brother Qiqi, knowing that he has successfully matched, he did not hesitate to agree to save his brother.
On the other hand, Qi Weimin, younger siblings do not give in to each other in order to fight for the family's house and property.
His siblings could quarrel at the door of his mother's hospital room. No one wants to provide for their mother's old age, nor does they want to serve in front of the hospital bed.
The sibling relationship is out of balance, which may be affected by the family's assets and resources.
Nobel said: "Money is such a thing as long as it can solve the life of the individual; If there is too much of it, it will become a scourge that stifles human talent. ”
If there is a lot of property in the family, it is easy for siblings to get into infighting.
Between each other, they pay too much attention to their immediate interests, are carried away by interests, and forget the deep feelings they have cultivated since childhood.
I am always afraid that I will suffer and want to take advantage of more. With such an ideology, precious family affection will become something they don't care about.
03. When borrowing money, please in every possible way, and talk about feelings when you want to repay the money
Gowry said, "Poverty requires a little, luxury requires a lot, but greed wants everything." ”
When siblings reach adulthood, their abilities and cultural levels are different, and the gap between the rich and the poor widens.
Those who are better in the economy often help those who are poorer, and it is common to borrow money from each other.
However, some brothers and sisters are not reliable in character.
For example, brothers and sisters with good economic conditions help brothers and sisters with poor conditions.
When he lent him the money, he had a very good attitude, but when it came time for him to pay him back, he cried poor and paid the bills.
When I borrowed money, I was a family, good brothers, and when it was time to repay the money, I shirked it in every possible way, and I felt that it was my brothers and sisters who were stingy to let him repay the money.
Gradually, after suffering several losses in good conditions, I don't want to associate with brothers and sisters who don't know how to be grateful, for fear of being affected by them.
The broken jars with poor conditions are broken, and the gap between them is getting bigger and bigger, and emotional indifference has become inevitable.
04. Conclusion
Screenwriter Wang Hailing once said: "The most difficult company in the world to run is family, and the most difficult relationship to run is husband and wife." ”
Brothers and sisters, blood is thicker than water, and it is a rare treasure.
If so, because of interests, it is a pity to let each other be scattered in the crowd.
Get along with your siblings and be less utilitarian. Family affection requires a family to manage well.
Return to the original intention, think about the affection for each other, give each other more warmth, and be less careful, and the management of feelings will take a turn.
-END-
Xiao Qian: A writer who loves words, loves words, and codes words for ten years. In his spare time, he will meet friends with words. For the rest of my life, with you by my side, life will be steaming.