Nowadays, too many people like Su Shi, his open-mindedness, and his literary brilliance.
He also has many friends, and he can mingle with ordinary people wherever he goes, such as the butcher who sells pork, the old woman who grows taro, and the fisherman who catches oysters.
How did Su Shi become everyone's favorite person? Feng Menglong, a writer in the Ming Dynasty, wrote several novels about Su Shi and revealed the answer.
A person's true emotional intelligence starts with bowing his head three times.
01
Bow your head to your boss and say "respect".
In "Wang Anshi's Three Difficulties and Bachelor Su", Su Shi went to report to Prime Minister Wang Anshi.
Wang Anshi was very busy, and Su Shi was led by his servants to the study to rest and wait.
Su Shi saw an unfinished poem on the desk, the first two sentences were: "The west wind passed through the garden last night, blowing down the yellow flowers and covering the ground with gold." ”
Su Shi smiled contemptuously, how can the yellow chrysanthemums fly, they are all slowly withering. This Wang Anshi is also old and confused.
Su Shi did not hesitate, picked up the pen, finished the poem, and said with criticism: "Autumn flowers are not better than spring flowers, say and chant carefully with the poet." ”
When Wang Anshi saw the verses, he immediately demoted Su Shi to Huangzhou.
When he arrived in Huangzhou, Su Shi saw that the chrysanthemums here were very different, the petals could really fly with the wind, and he lowered his head and was ashamed.
Wang Anshi arranged for Su Shi to go to the Three Gorges of Qutang to take the water from the Middle Gorge and use it to make tea.
Unexpectedly, Su Shi took a boat and arrived at the lower gorge as soon as he slipped through the smoke, so he could only take the water from the lower gorge and deal with the matter.
When Wang Anshi identified the source of the water, Su Shi was speechless.
The poem says: "It is good to be the first to be modest, and the knowledge is endless." ”
Su Shi, who used to be arrogant and arrogant, found that his knowledge was far inferior to Wang Anshi, so he lowered his head and received Wang Anshi's understanding and help.
There is a good saying: "A boss is a boss, and even if it doesn't look good, it has its own merits." ”
In these years, it is not only the officials who oppress people, but also understand that "there is a sky outside the sky, and there are people outside the people".
In the workplace, whoever respects the boss more will be able to better obey the arrangement and do a solid job.
Be conscientious and obedient, obey the arrangement, and work hard, this is the best emotional intelligence in the workplace. Really don't take flattery as emotional intelligence, it's a flattery for a while, and it won't be on the stage after all.
Remember, "full of losses, humble benefits".
You should be respectful to your existing boss, and you should also consider that the colleagues around you also have something to admire, and maybe they will become your boss in the future. People who are lower than you should also take a closer look, and they may surpass you in the future.
Communicate with humility, and you will not only be liked, but you will also learn a lot.
02
Bow your head to your family, and call it "love".
In "Su Xiaomei's Three Difficulties Groom", Su Xiaomei has grown up and is looking for a partner.
As Su Shi's younger sister, the person who came to pursue the little sister broke through the threshold.
In the heart of the little sister, there is a talented man named Qin Guan. Su Shi and his father brought Qin Guan over to match.
On the day of the marriage between the little sister and Qin Guan, the little sister suddenly made a difficulty, and she had to test Qin Guan's talent on the spot.
The little sister gave Qin Guan an envelope with a line of words inside: The moon before closing the door and pushing out the window.
Obviously, this is an uplink, but also a landscape, an action.
Qin Guan thought about it for a long time, but he didn't know how to answer.
Seeing that it was the middle of the night, I hadn't figured it out yet, how could I get into the cave room?
Su Shi, who was watching from the sidelines, picked up a stone and threw it into the water tank in the courtyard. There was a "poof" and a splash.
Qin Guan had an epiphany and said, "Throwing stones to break through the underwater sky." Then he went to the cave house, the life of the husband and wife, and the harmony and beauty.
Another day, Su Shi got a post that read: "Wild, birds, birds, crying, all the time, there are, Sisi, spring and ......"
Su Shi thought about it, frowned, and showed the post to his little sister.
The little sister said: "Wild birds cry, wild birds cry from time to time. There is a spring peach blossom hair, and the spring peach blossom hair is full of branches......"
Su Shi laughed and praised the little sister for her literary talent.
Since then, people have praised that Su Shi has a younger sister who is more literary than Su Shi.
Although this little sister is a virtual character, it is enough to see Su Shi's love for her family. He is always inferior to his family, highlighting the role of his family.
At critical times, he can quietly deal with problems for his family.
Su Shi has been demoted many times in his life, and he has walked to many desolate places, and his family will never abandon him. And it's not because of "love" yet.
As long as the family loves each other and is together, no matter how poor and miserable they are, they are not afraid, and they are happy to farm and live.
Bow to your parents, love is filial piety; Bow to your wife, love is true love; Bow your head to your brothers and sisters, love is forbearance; Bow to your children, love is encouragement and recognition.
03
Bow your head to your friends, and call it "respect".
In "The Buddha Seal Master Four-Tune Qin Niang", Su Shi has a friend named Buddha Yin.
Su Shi took the Buddha seal and participated in the sacrificial activities presided over by Song Shenzong.
During the event, Buddha Yin dressed up as a monk, and was mistaken for a real monk by Song Shenzong, so he said: "Qing is a monk, that is, he is entrusted to the secretary to assist in fasting." If you are strict with the precepts on a different day, you can be the abbot of the temple, so as not to insult the sect and have negative intentions! ”
As soon as the emperor's golden mouth was opened, it was the holy decree, and the Buddha seal was self-defeating.
Su Shi also felt that he couldn't go, and he should find a way to make the Buddha seal more vulgar.
One day, Su Shi invited the kabuki qin girl and arranged for her to get close to the Buddha seal and let her get close to the woman, so as to have a reason and idea to return to the vulgar.
Buddha Yin saw Qin Niang and wrote a poem: "Pass it to Wushan My Fair Lady, Hugh will annoy King Xiang with his soul dream." The Zen heart has been stained with mud, and it does not chase the east wind up and down. ”
Su Shi had an epiphany, Buddha Yin was determined to be a monk, and he should not interfere too much, so he became more and more respectful, so he became a guest of the curtain.
Respecting your friends' choices and ideas is fundamental to relationships.
Everyone has their own three views, suggestions, choices, rhetoric, etc., and it is impossible for them to be agreed with you, but if you express respect, that is, you cherish the friendship.
People are mixed in society, and they are not all people of the same level and industry. Only with respect can we socialize across industries, not climb high, not step low, not be humble or arrogant.
04
A person's emotional intelligence is not to speak tactfully, not to please and sell well, but to help people, love people, and understand people with heart and affection.
Verbal pandering will only bring temporary social success, and genuine interaction can withstand the test of "road remote knowledge".
Learn from Su Shi, bow your head to others, raise your head to be a man, and embrace the broad life.
Bowing your head is not weakness, but courage.
Bowing your head is not to please, but to wish you well.
Author: Cloth Clothes Coarse Food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.