Boys need more company from their fathers, because spending too much time with their mothers will make children lack masculinity and become "girly". Boys do need the guidance of their fathers, but the influence of their mothers is still very large, after all, mothers still take care of their children a lot.
The mother said that her son was bloodless and was "bullied" by her daughter-in-law, but she did not know that her son's weakness was caused by her
The eldest mother has only one son, Xiao Ning, who grew up holding in the palm of her hand. Aunt Zhang is a very strong person, everything outside the home is her decision, her husband obeys her, and her son's affairs are even more handy. Aunt Zhang lived a life like a "queen" at home for decades, but after her son married his daughter-in-law, it ended.
Xiao Ning has been a very obedient child since he was a child, he will never refute the opinions of his parents and mothers, and after marrying his daughter-in-law, he is also obedient to his daughter-in-law. The housework is done by Xiao Ning alone, the salary card is handed over to the daughter-in-law for safekeeping from marriage, as long as the daughter-in-law speaks a little louder, he immediately does not dare to speak, for fear that the daughter-in-law will be angry.
Aunt Zhang is sometimes not satisfied with her daughter-in-law, she will nag twice, and as long as the son sees that his mother and wife have an argument, he will quickly hide and not come out, not daring to offend any of them. Aunt Zhang sighed and said: "My son has not been the first in the examination since he was a child, and I am afraid that my daughter-in-law can rank first." ”
The old mother complained that the son was afraid of his daughter-in-law, and did not know how he had given birth to such a bloodless son, and the daughter-in-law complained that her husband was too embarrassed to stand up for herself, and hated herself for being blind and marrying a "mother treasure man". Two women often have conflicts, but the two men in the family can't stop it, such a family model, life is flying and jumping.
Mother treasure man or afraid of daughter-in-law, summed up in a sentence is that men are too weak. There are always some strong mothers, in the face of their sons being bullied by others, very powerless, I have such a temper, how can I have such an indisputable son?
In fact, the mother should really reflect on herself, and the weakness of the son and the mother really have a lot to do with it.
If the mother is one of these personalities, the son is likely to be a weaker personality when he grows up
First, the mother is too strong and strict with her son.
If the mother is too strong, the son will be weaker, which is a very common phenomenon. Because the child's personality has a lot to do with the mother's upbringing from childhood, the strong mother is very strict with the child, and is controlled by the mother from an early age.
When children are accustomed to such a mode of life, they will also get used to listening to the opinions of others, dare not put forward their own opinions, and become an introverted and weak person.
Second, the mother's inferiority is full of negative energy, and the child has no self-confidence.
Some mothers often say to their children: "Our family is too poor to be compared with rich people." "Mothers are always emphasizing the shortcomings of their own families, so that children also feel inferior in front of others, and when interacting with others, they have no opinions, dare not express, and dare not resist when they are bullied."
It is the mother's inferiority that affects the child, and the child has no confidence.
Third, the mother has absolute authority at home, and the father is "strict with the wife".
Dad is an idol in boys' minds, and they often imitate dad's words and deeds and learn how to be a man. Many fathers' family status is not as good as that of mothers, and mothers say that they are not different at home, and their fathers are a "strict wife". The son sits in the pattern of getting along with his father and mother, and he is a person like his father, and he does not dare to resist the opinions of others.
Boys should have the appearance of boys, believing that mothers are willing to have a strong, brave, optimistic son, so the son's education at home should be like this.
Let the child do it on their own
Courage and ability need to be exercised, weak and incompetent children are flowers in the greenhouse, parents are too strict and thoughtful to their children, so that children lose a lot of opportunities to do it, become afraid to try, afraid of failure.
We raise boys, we must dare to let go, let him explore on his own, to experience failure, to achieve success. In the process of doing it himself, the child exercises his ability, enhances his confidence, and has the courage to dare to bear failure.
Allow your child to vent his emotions
Not allowing boys to cry their noses is the practice of many mothers, but crying their noses does not mean that boys are strong. Children do not dare to express their emotions, but it is not conducive to the healthy growth of body and mind.
Children have dissatisfaction can express their opinions, sad things can be vented with tears, a child who dares to vent his unhappiness can know how to reject others and not to be a "soft persimmon" at the mercy of others.
Dads become idols and friends of their children
Boys need the company of their fathers, and fathers should bring more sons in life. Moms also need to make efforts to maintain the image of dad in the eyes of their children, and not always belittle dad in front of their children. When the father becomes the hero in the child's mind, he himself will become very brave, and the father's guidance is very important.
Strong and optimistic children are more likely to become mature, strong and optimistic character makes children's lives happier, to cultivate a real man, but also need parents to work together.