1. The brother-in-law went out to buy cigarettes, and his Huawei P40pro mobile phone landed at home. Suddenly there was a phone call coming, I looked at the display "10010", I didn't think much about it, just hung up!? Passed

1. The brother-in-law went out to buy cigarettes, and his Huawei P40pro phone was left at home. Suddenly there was a phone call coming, I looked at the display "10010", I didn't think much about it, just hung up!? After a while, a text message came, and the sender was exactly 10010: "Why don't you answer the phone?" My heart was very worried, and the jewel made God send a call back. On the other side of the phone came my niece's familiar voice: "Dad, why don't you answer my phone?" My living expenses are gone, you hurry up and call me!?" I instantly understood what 10010 meant.

2. It was pouring rain outside, and I was dressed in Uniqlo clothes and waiting at the bus stop. Cautiously, afraid that the raindrops would wet my newly purchased Uniqlo, I suddenly saw a girl standing next to me, without an umbrella. So I said to her: Sister, my bus is coming, I will lend you my umbrella, leave a phone, and tomorrow you will return it to me. My sister looked at me and said, "No, my boyfriend is coming to pick me up." As soon as the words stopped, a Ferrari stopped next to the beauty.

3. Life Class Teacher: Cows are expensive, or chickens are expensive? Xiaoming rushed to answer: Chicken is expensive! Teacher: Why? Xiaoming: Nine cows are only one dime, and chickens are eight hairs. Teacher: Get out! The biology teacher asked: Wolves and dogs are called wolf dogs after mating, but what about tigers and lions? Xiaoming answered again: Call the old lion. Teacher: Roll the calves, don't come tomorrow! Math Teacher: Students, today we are going to review the multiplication techniques. Three seven? Xiaoming: Four concubines! Teacher: Sanjiu? Bob: Stomach Thai! Teacher: Five or eight? Bob: Same city! Teacher: Nine-nine? Bob: Duck neck! Teacher: Get out, get out!

4. Today I accompany my daughter-in-law to the pregnancy test, although I don't care if it's a boy or a girl. But I still trusted acquaintances and knew the gender. What curiosity kills! When I told my daughter-in-law that I was pregnant with a girlfriend, my daughter-in-law was stunned for a moment, and then gave me a big mouth with her backhand: "You scumbag, you actually had a lover in your previous life!" "I really... What a mistake!

5. The boyfriend owns a tech company and is now 47 years old, and his grandson is 3 years old. This night when we were sleeping, my boyfriend suddenly said to me: Dear, now I can have a second child, you see my family is big, give me a son! Me: So you answer me a question first, okay? Boyfriend: Well, you ask! Me: If one day, the grandson and the son fight, who will you help? One is a son and the other is a grandson! The boyfriend shuddered: This...

6. Yesterday I paid 3,000 yuan in salary, and today I rode my bike to withdraw the money. As a result, I forgot to bring the lock, and fortunately there was a cash truck parked next to it, and there were two escorts. I said to them: Big brother, I want to go get some money, can you help me see the car? They agreed, and when they came out, an escort said to me: Remember that on this day, there are two people with guns guarding your bicycle. I instantly felt that I had reached the peak of my life...

7. After living with a divorced landlady for half a year, she broke up with me and gave me a house as compensation. I lived alone in a big house and was particularly lonely, so I found a beautiful woman to share. She's a female anchor, and I often watch her live. On this day, the beauty said in the live broadcast: I am going to move tomorrow, and I can't broadcast it live. When I heard this news, I panicked, can't I see beautiful women in the future? So I immediately ran to knock on the door to confess, but I didn't expect the beauty to agree! I asked her where she was going, and I wanted to go too, and the beauty said, "Isn't it upstairs?" The floor is high and the light is a little better. "

8. When I was in junior high school, I was in school to participate in sports meetings, but I couldn't find anyone, so I let this delicious and lazy little fat man go to the 1500 meters competition. Many running students borrowed running shoes from the sports team, saying that they could run faster when they were worn. Before I started running, the class teacher finally borrowed a pair and hurried to change it for me. Then anxiously asked, "Are the shoes suitable?" I took a few steps and said solemnly, "The shoes are right, but the feet are a little bigger!"

9. Two days ago, a particularly good movie was released, and two good friends made an appointment to go to the movie tomorrow. The next day, one of them went to the cinema first and found the son of a good friend sitting next to him. The good friend asked: Little fellow, how did you get in? The little guy said, "I came in with my dad's movie ticket!" Good Friend: What about your dad? Is there something that can't come? Little Guy: No, no, no, my dad is looking for his movie tickets at home right now!

10. I finished my work early this afternoon, and I had an hour left for work, so it felt like i had to wait for work. In boredom, my husband called: "Honey, I'm going to pick you up from work tonight, I'm afraid there are bad people on the road." I said happily, "You still care about people!" Don't you always say I'm ugly? Rest assured, I'm safe. Husband: "No, I already know you're paying tonight, and I'm going to protect it." ”

11. Do not disturb, the male guest came out and began to introduce himself: "I deal with the land all day!" In an instant the lights went out six. Male guest: "I don't have a stable high salary!" Then the lights went out eight more. Male guest: "I'm not going to buy a house yet!" Finally, the lights were all out. The host hurried to round the field: "I think many people look down on our peasant brothers, thinking that they have no money and no house, which is an extremely wrong idea!" Male guest: "Interrupt, I'm not a farmer, I'm a real estate developer." ”

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