The other day I heard a colleague tell me:
His youngest son, who is just two years old this year, has learned to lie.
A few days ago, she took her son to the supermarket, and on the way back, she found that his mouth was covered with bread crumbs, and colleagues judged that it should be the child who secretly ate in the supermarket, so she asked: "Long Long, are you eating without checkout?" ”
Unexpectedly, Long Long squeezed out an innocent expression and insisted that he had done nothing.
I believe that many parents have encountered such a situation, found that the child has dishonest behavior, but also will worry about the child, so will there be a problem with the character when they grow up?
Children lie when they are two years old
I've seen a statistic earlier that about 25 percent of children lie by the age of two.
And as children get older, so do their chances of lying, and by the age of four, 94 percent of children are already lying.
In fact, children all over the world will lie, children's early behavior and age have an absolute relationship, and the relationship with family education and growth environment is not large.
Why do children lie
Children at different ages, the reasons for lying are also different.
Children aged 2 to 3 can't distinguish between reality and imagination, so you may find that children often "run trains with their mouths full", such as "I slept on the moon last night" and "Dad ate the sugar".
Children 3 to 4 years old have been able to realize that their thoughts may be different from others, but their cognitive development ability is limited, so they always rely on emotions to promote their own behavior.
For example, the younger son of a colleague secretly ate the bread of the supermarket, and felt guilty under the mother's inquiry, in order to avoid being criticized by his mother, and in order not to let himself feel guilty, he would lie that he did not eat.
There is also a possibility, such as the child has eaten a piece of chocolate, but in order to get another piece, he says that he has not eaten it.
Is it a red flag for children to lie?
Lying by a child is not a very bad behavior.
This is a necessary stage in the development of a child's mind, and it can even be understood that a child who can lie may be smarter.
Because lying may represent the maturity of a child's cognitive abilities and the nervous system of the brain.
Therefore, when the child has the behavior of lying, parents do not have to panic, as long as they use the right method to guide the child in the right direction, there will be no big flaws.
What to do if the child lies
Flexibly use the methods of "reward" and "punishment" to cleverly let the child tell the truth.
Take away the benefits of lying from the child, and give the child more benefits when he tells the truth, and the child will slowly find that it is easier to solve the problem by telling the truth.
For example, after the child eats bread, he is afraid of being criticized, so he will say that he did not eat it. Then instead of criticizing him, we encourage him to tell the truth, and if the child admits his behavior, he can be given an appropriate reward.
At the same time, parents themselves should also lead by example, minimize lying in life, tell more truth, and treat others honestly. If the parents themselves lie a lot, it is too difficult to let the child not lie.