1, a driver big brother is smart! Forget to bring a driver's license, the idea is not good to meet the traffic police! Suddenly the driver's big brother is in a hurry! Without waiting for the traffic police to let him stop, he slowly drove to the front of the traffic police

1, a driver big brother is smart! Forget to bring a driver's license, the idea is not good to meet the traffic police! Suddenly the driver's big brother is in a hurry! Without waiting for the traffic police to let him stop, he slowly drove to the traffic police, nodded his head and said, "I left first!" Go home for dinner in the evening! When the time comes, I'll be calling you!" The two traffic policemen were stunned and laughed! After watching the driver's big brother drive away! A traffic policeman asked another traffic policeman: "What kind of relative are you?" Another traffic cop said, "Isn't that your relative?"

2. A man is drinking on the side of the road and comes over to a policeman. The policeman asked, "Why are you drinking heavily on the side of the road?" The man said: "The car is lost, the mood is bad." The policeman asked, "Where did you lose it?" The man took another big sip of wine and said sadly, "Lost in A shares." ”

3, the brother played the "dating software" when he met a flight attendant, after meeting the two are ready to flash marriage. At the wedding, my brother said: After I fell in love with you, I also loved many people. We were all frightened, my sister-in-law was stunned, and the host didn't know what to say. Seeing this scene, the brother continued with satisfaction: Many people, including your parents, your family, your friends... The audience suddenly applauded, and my sister-in-law paused and asked: "Do you include my girlfriend?"

4, the old man is a well-known local developer, there is a single earned more than 30 million, he gave me a Toyota Land Cruiser. This morning I was driving the Land Cruiser on my way to work when I saw a female colleague on the side of the road running. I offered to take her for a ride, otherwise the walk would be too slow and the late arrival would be deducted. The female colleague thought I was a married man and refused. Unexpectedly, the female colleague arrived on time, and I was late for the traffic jam and fined 500 yuan!

5. The day after Valentine's Day, after work, I came to a restaurant with my wife to eat. When the meal was served, I tasted the fish and meat that had just been served. I said with emotion: I would have known about such a meal and come a few days in advance. The restaurant owner heard this and said happily: Sir is such a gourmet! The food in our shop is indeed superb, thank you for the compliment! I went on to say: I mean if I had come a few days earlier, the fish and meat would have been fresh.

6, I am 26 years old this year, but I still do not have a girlfriend, my friends who go to the position and some of the children will play soy sauce. My colleagues in the unit have long been paired, and I am still alone. Our supervisor looked at me pitifully and transferred me to the department where the girls were together! After I went there, I was particularly shy, and recently my courage had just grown a little bigger, and the supervisor transferred me back. I asked why, and the supervisor said, "Well, the loss of personnel after you went is too serious."

7, recently my brother-in-law wanted to buy a car, the old man said no money, brother-in-law: "Don't lie to me, I don't want to be too good, hundreds of thousands of on the line." The old man said: "Although the car can be bought, but after buying the car, there is still a lot of money to spend." Brother-in-law: "Rest assured, insurance and maintenance cars absolutely do not want your money, I will pay for it myself." The old man: "I'm not saying this, as far as your driving level is concerned, in case you hit a luxury car or encounter a bump, porcelain boss... That's not the price of a car. ”

8, it is often said that the road is narrow, it is really a good point, excuses and truth This pair of old enemies met on the street. The truth is that the excuse always steals her limelight, and it must be more popular than anyone else. People gathered around, leaving excuses with nowhere to hide and accepting the challenge of the truth. And when the mask is taken off at the same time as the excuse and the truth, people stop talking. Although they do not distinguish between winning and losing, people are unanimous in their views. People say: Although they don't like excuses, they didn't expect the truth to be so ugly.

9. Before my wife married me, she worked as a nun in a nunnery, and her skills were extraordinary. After marriage, I found that my wife was physically strong and had muscles all over her body. Once, I took my wife to climb a mountain and met a wild bear. Frightened, I hurriedly pulled my wife to lie down and pretend to die, otherwise I would definitely be slapped to death by the bear. Unexpectedly, after the bear took a look at his wife, he directly lay on the ground, and his wife carried me away. I can't forget the sympathetic look in The Bear's eyes now...?

10. Went to Sanya, Hainan province for honeymoon with my wife, and my wife asked me to take pictures for her. She took a look at her phone and angrily said, "Why do you shoot me in the face so big?" Me: "Didn't you say you were going to shoot a close-up?" Wife: "Then come to Zhang Yuan." After the shooting, the wife was even more angry, she said: "Let you shoot me and the beach, why do you shoot like I crouched on the beach and pulled SHI?" Me: "You're big and short, and I can't help it!" ”

11. There is only one female colleague in our department, and we often tease her, and as a result, we are often teased by her. That day, a female colleague came over and said: Last night I dreamed that you drove a colorful cloud to see me. I blushed: Huh? Female colleague: You still stick your tongue at me. Me: Haha, am I so naughty? Female colleague: Well, at that time, you were crouching at the feet of The Erlang God.

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #