On the night shift, in the middle of the night the patient pressed the pager, I hurried over to see what was going on, only to see him sitting on the edge of the bed crying and saying, Nurse, you go to find the doctor, my legs are missing, I can't walk, go quickly

On the night shift, in the middle of the night the patient pressed the pager, I hurried over to see what was going on, only to see him sitting on the edge of the bed crying and saying, nurse, you go to find the doctor, my legs are missing, I can't walk, go to the doctor, see if you want to install a prosthesis? Me: Uncle, isn't your leg here, why is it gone? Uncle: Oh, maybe I sat for a long time, numb, I didn't feel... forehead......

2. The brother-in-law who has always slammed the door actually took the initiative to invite me to drink today. Looking at his face very ugly, I asked: What happened? The brother-in-law said sadly: After a year of marriage, my wife was not pregnant, and the doctor said that it was my problem. I comforted him: It's okay, your wife can be pregnant, now the technology is developed. The brother-in-law said angrily: When I was still in college, I borrowed more than 2,000 yuan everywhere to give my ex-girlfriend a tire!

3, today the fruit family held a collective meeting, mainly to discuss the marriage of apples and oranges, may be the temperature of the air conditioner is too low, so the banana is frozen cold. So Banana went to the doctor. The doctor said: First put the clothes TUO! I'll check it out for you. Then the banana pulls open the clothes. The doctor took a picture after seeing it: what a cold, you are clearly a curved spine, go buy back and back!

4. Before going to the ward, the chief physician said to several intern doctors: When you arrive at the ward, you observe the patient's condition, and if you know, you will nod, and if you can't observe, you will shake your head. Then the interns followed them to the ward, and they looked at one of the patients, then shook their heads and followed the director out of the ward. After a while, the family came to visit and asked: Your face is not good, or should I go and call the doctor? The patient said bitterly: No need, prepare me for the aftermath, just now a large group of doctors sighed and shook their heads here, I think I am not saved...

5. The psychiatry that my sister-in-law studied in college, and after graduation, she went to a doctor and became a psychiatrist in the hospital. One day the sister-in-law met a woman with a little girl who came to see her. The woman said: Doctor, my daughter has always felt like an ostrich for half a year. The sister-in-law said: It has been half a year, why is it only now that I have brought a doctor? Woman: Because our family has been waiting to eat ostrich eggs!

6, the brothers went to meet the relatives, the brother-in-law wanted to give the brothers a horse, in front of the crowd performed a chest crushing stone. As soon as the hammer went down, the stone slab was fine, and the brother-in-law spat out a mouthful of blood and did not move. A doctor who understood the doctor shook his head after seeing it: "Take advantage of the fact that everyone is together and finish the marriage, so let's do his aftermath." When everyone was discussing what to do, the brother-in-law eased up, and pointed to the stone slab on his body like a gossamer and asked someone to move the stone slab down. At the time of the wedding photo, the young people were standing, two eighty-year-old people were sitting, and the brother-in-law was lying down, full of momentum, like a boss.

7, just handed in last week to write a leave of absence, the recent flu leave students are particularly many, a child in the class called me to ask for leave: teacher, I have a cold today, a little fever, in the morning my mother will take me to the hospital, take a half day off, please ask the teacher for approval. After listening to it, I habitually asked: Is there anything else to say? As a result, the child said stupidly: Sincerely, salute!

8, bored at home, today went to apply. The eldest sister of the interview asked about the basic situation and asked me about my professional knowledge... I was talking, but unexpectedly, I was nauseous and vomited... The eldest sister of the interview asked me to go to the hospital for a check-up... My brother said excitedly: Daughter-in-law, are you pregnant? My sister-in-law glanced at my brother and said: What do you buy early, I have gastroenteritis and committed it again.

9, people who only sleep 4 hours a day are seriously threatening their health (excluding a very small number of people who do not need so much sleep), residents who sleep less than 4 hours, and make the mistake of sleeping 2 times that of doctors who sleep for 7 hours. In almost all school surveys, the shorter the students slept, the worse their grades declined. This means that in a relatively fair environment, ensuring sleep time can guarantee good personal performance. Those who are successful in the so-called only 4 hours of sleep, there are many success factors, and short sleep time is not necessarily one of them.

10, my son is a chaotic demon king, very capable of tossing, my wife and I also beat and scolded, a little useless. Later, my daughter-in-law was depressed all day, and I was afraid that she would get depressed, so I quickly sent it to the psychiatrist for people to see. After understanding the situation, the doctor prescribed a little medicine and said: Your problem is not serious, just take some calming tablets. Later, the doctor called back to visit: How effective is the medicine? My daughter-in-law said: Thank you doctor, it's much better now. The doctor asked again: What about the children? Is there any progress? The wife said: Who cares about him, who loves to manage who cares, hahaha.

1 Regal is unwell and goes to the hospital for examination, Doctor: Drinking? Rich: I don't stick to alcohol. The doctor asked: Do you smoke? Rich: I learned it when I was young, but it was uncomfortable to smoke, so I didn't smoke. Doctor: Always go to the tea room to drink tea and play cards, right? Rich: I only drink boiled water, and I can't play any card. The doctor shook his head and waved his hand: This year, you are a person who does not know anything, there is really no medicine to save!

12, the aunt has been sick recently, no, the daughter-in-law has recently been sick. The weather is getting hotter and hotter, there are a lot of willows floating outside, and the daughter-in-law is allergic to willows, and she has a lot of acne on her body. Last night to go to the hospital to prescribe medicine, the doctor will take several tablets at a time, the dosage of usage and dosage is written on the package, one tablet at a time to write a "one", two tablets at a time to write a "two". When the daughter-in-law returned home and took the medicine, she looked at the packaging, and the result was that the "two" was put up to see "11"! The daughter-in-law was still a little confused at that time, but according to the doctor's writing, she ate 11 capsules at a time! Now I want to ask you if this is an accident.

13, recently the work pressure is too much, hair fell off one by one, I think I am about to bald. Looking at the dwindling hair, I became very anxious, so I asked my mother: "Mom, do you think I need to go to the hospital to check why TUO hair?" The old mother comforted: "No, your father was like this when he was young, and this time will not fall." I looked at Dad's bald head after listening to it, and suddenly felt a kind of uneasiness...