Borrowing money from relatives once can clearly see the following facts.

Live a simple life
Original 2022/02/10 18: 38 Outstanding authors in the field of emotion
relative
01
No one asks when the city is poor, and there are distant relatives when the mountain is rich.
Chen Anzhi said: "Success is equal to knowledge plus networking - knowledge accounts for 30%, and networking accounts for 70%."
Networking is important, but who is the real network? It was not clear for a moment.
I have the impression that relatives are the people who grew up with us and encouraged us the most.
When I was a child, every Spring Festival I would go to visit the New Year with my parents. The seventh aunt and the eighth aunt were very enthusiastic about me, so they had to stay and eat, and the big fish and meat were all on the table. Relatives who are slightly more remote have to stay for one night.
I always get a big red envelope when I leave.
The father said to leave the red envelope money for tuition fees.
Two days before the start of the school year, I repeatedly counted the red envelope money and found that it was more than the tuition fee.
To be honest, in those days, there were very few rich people among the parents and relatives, and most of them made a living from farming. The generosity of my loved ones warms me.
02
Relatives may not be able to withstand the test of "borrowing money".
When I grew up, I suddenly found that the relationship between relatives had undergone subtle changes - feelings, which changed with the changes in economic conditions, told everything in life.
Borrowing money once can know a person's place in the hearts of relatives.
I went to a secondary school in the 1990s.
In those years, only top students could go to secondary school. According to local policy, as long as you graduate from secondary school, you can assign jobs and enter the system or large factories.
But the tuition fee of more than 2600 yuan a semester made my mother very anxious. She had the courage to go to her mother's house.
As soon as my little uncle opened his mouth, he said, "If you can't even pay the tuition, you don't study, you don't go to work, and you can make money without spending money.
The mother did not borrow money from her family, but was refused.
Reluctantly, my mother sold the family's cattle and borrowed some loans before sending me to secondary school.
At the end of the 90s, I graduated from secondary school.
With the development of the times, middle school students are no longer popular. The expected work turned into a bubble. Stayed at home for a while and then decided to go to Dongguan to work.
My mother told me sheepishly, "There are only twenty dollars in the house." If you go to work, you can find your way. ”
I went to my second uncle's house. He has been contracting the peach orchard in the village and making a lot of money.
After I explained my intentions, the second uncle did not speak. The second aunt said: "The money in the family is given to your cousin, and he opens a factory in a foreign country..."
He came out of the second uncle's house and went to the homes of three relatives, all of whom were rejected.
The most incomprehensible thing is that the third uncle, who usually encourages me to study hard, also said sarcastically: "What is the use of reading?" If I hadn't gone to school, my family would have saved tens of thousands of dollars, and it wouldn't have been so shabby. ”
Ten years ago, I planned to buy a house in the county.
My father asked me, "How much does it cost to buy a house?" Who can I borrow money from? If you don't think about it, don't dream. ”
This time, I struggled to get a loan to buy a house, preferring to be a house slave rather than grateful to Dade.
Although life is very stressful and you will also receive calls for collection, it is very direct to deal with people, so don't have too many courtesies.
03
Relatives, after borrowing money, can be divided into two types: reliable and unreliable.
Some people say, "Relatives can't choose, friends can choose."
Since relatives cannot choose to follow the blood lineage, they must learn to face it. It is best to divide relatives into several categories, from now on, and associate with reliable relatives and break off relations with unreliable relatives.
Depending on the sincerity and action of the relatives to help, it is possible to "know" the relationship between the relatives. But because of face, you have to pretend to be stupid.
Reliable relatives have the following characteristics: First, the family is not necessarily very wealthy, and your blood relationship is not necessarily close, but it is kind-hearted and generous. Second, money can be negotiated, but the rules will be clear, and there is a relationship of "interest exchange". You will not be confused because of your loved ones, you will become right and wrong. Third, communication is not very frequent, and there is no contradiction between your home and his family.
For example, Uncle Zhang, the old uncle in the village next door to my family, rarely visits the New Year during the New Year. But he usually went out with my father to do carpentry. When my father was in difficulty, he would also help; when he was paid, he would be a little more and a little less, and he didn't care.
Unreliable relatives, these characteristics are obvious: they are obsessed with others, they can usually speak the truth and tell lies, they seduce powerful people, they meet the poor, they immediately change their mouths, and they deny their previous promises; people are poor and rich, the richer they are, the more they cut the door, they are afraid of being dragged down by poor relatives; they are very greedy, and they are eager to give the interests of the big family to themselves; they are calculating, they get what they get, and they will scold their relatives.
As the saying goes, "The human heart is flesh."
To see a person clearly, you must not only use your eyes, but also use your heart. You can't "beat people to death with a stick" and treat all your loved ones as cruel people.
Most of the people who warm your heart are reliable, even if it is a dripping grace, you have to repay them with a spring. You can't erase all goodwill just because a relative has done something that makes you uncomfortable.
04
epilogue.
Goethe said: "Although we can grow up under the protection of our parents and relatives, rely on our brothers and friends, and achieve happiness by loving others, in the final analysis, human beings still have to rely on themselves."
No matter how good a relative is, if you have no backbone, you become a person who will not stick mud on the wall, and the relative will also become bad and will not pay attention to you.
No matter how bad your relatives are, as long as you pluck up the courage to move forward, once you have achieved something, your relatives will smile at you and take the initiative to approach you.
Human nature often does not stand the test. Don't think that blood is reliable. After all, everyone is planning their own career and serving their little family. If you are not a "family member" of a relative, then you should be an outsider.
Truly wise people, trying to be themselves, when rich and powerful, will be grateful to reliable relatives and help poor relatives.
Humanity is as thin as paper. After all the hardships, you better know how to repay grievances with virtue.
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