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With the development of the times and the change of ideological concepts, more and more new words have appeared on the Internet, such as Ma Bao Nan and Fu Di Devil, these two kinds of people are simply the objects that people are most afraid of encountering when they are blind dates.
First of all, let's talk about Ma Bao male, this pair of males has no opinion, everything must listen to the words of the family, if the girl and such a boy get married, they will definitely be wronged in the future.
The second is the brother demon, which refers to the girl who has a younger brother in the family who needs to take care of, because her family has carved the idea of son preference in her bones, so they will unscrupulously squeeze their daughters, and even ask their daughters to help their brothers after marriage, such as buying a car or buying a house or giving him pocket money.
For such girls, blindly helping her brother will certainly make her stressed, but under the brainwashing of her parents, it is difficult for them to get rid of the original family, let alone get rid of this shackle.
Fortunately, the development of the Internet has greatly improved women's self-awareness, and now many girls have got rid of their original predicament and have lived a life for themselves.
But in addition to the above two kinds of people, there is a new type of people in the blind date market, and their ideas are even more terrifying than those of the fudi demon, and everyone usually calls them "pastoral women".
The biggest feature of this type of girl is that she often talks about her gender, and in their hearts, women should get the supreme benefit.
However, interests and responsibilities correspond, in order to get more benefits, people are bound to pay more responsibilities, but unfortunately, in the process of demanding benefits, they do not consider the responsibilities and obligations they need to bear, and even resolutely resist paying.
Fighting for rights does not mean asking for privileges, and if there is only dividends and no responsibility, then this kind of thinking is indeed more extreme than the help of the brother demon.
Some people think that this is a feminist thought, a sign of social progress, but in fact, pastoral thought is not feminism in the true sense, what they want is not equal rights, but privilege.
Such women insist that they should receive more care and preferential treatment as women, but at the same time, they refuse to fulfill all women's responsibilities, and in essence, this kind of thinking is exactly the same as the patriarchal thinking of the old society, but the gender has changed.
In the case of marriage, for example, this group of people wants to receive full care from the man in the married life, but she does not have to make any sacrifices for the marriage.
If these people are shallow, it is not entirely true, because after all, they are influenced by Western female liberalism, so they can't wait to get more benefits, but at the same time, they ignore one point, that is, to enjoy the benefits must be paid, if it is just a hedonistic lifestyle, no obligation is willing to fulfill, then this is definitely not real equal rights.
If the status of the husband and wife is to achieve balance, the payment of each other must be similar, and only when the responsibilities of both parties are consistent, the spiritual world can be compatible, and this is the real free marriage and peaceful right marriage.
Unfortunately, some pastoral brigades have completely distorted feminist ideas, and the benevolent morality they say is only used to cover up the excuse of selfishness and self-reliance.
Standing on the moral high ground to require men to pay unconditionally, in fact, is also a kind of gender oppression, if it is difficult for husband and wife to support each other and pay together, then where is the meaning of marriage?
The maintenance of a small family requires the joint efforts of two husband and wife, if only one party keeps paying, while the other party continues to enjoy, then the paying party will inevitably be unwilling, and even feel that the other party does not care about this marriage.
How exactly did the "Pastoral Girl" come about? This is inseparable from the material desires of modern society. Some women have obtained excellent material conditions and a satisfactory married life by virtue of their own efforts, but in the eyes of "pastoral women", they only see superficial material conditions, and because of this, they naively think that as long as they marry a person with excellent material conditions, they can live happily.
Happiness does not depend on material conditions, and material satisfaction will certainly make people less worried, but the true meaning of happiness lies in your spiritual world.
There is no shortage of successful career women in this society, but the reason for their achievements is the hard work of the past, not the simple marriage of a rich person.
Whether it is a man or a woman, everyone should recognize reality and remain rational on the road to happiness. There is no problem in asking for benefits, as long as you fulfill the corresponding responsibilities and obligations, if you only care about asking for it, but refuse to pay, even if you can get what you want, it is not reliable after all.
- The End -
Author | Tommy
Edit | Rain
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
参考资料:Bruk, A., Scholl, S. G., & Bless, H. (2018). Beautiful mess effect: Self–other differences in evaluation of showing vulnerability. Journal of personality and social psychology, 115(2), 192-205