Keeping the hearts of children is what every parent dreams of. When a child is young, you are the closest person to him, but when he grows up, he chooses to alienate you, which is tantamount to inserting a knife in the heart of his parents. Many parents are puzzled why their children are still not close to them when they are so good to their children? In fact, the problem lies in the parenting style of their parents.
A family that has not taken good care of its children since childhood
First of all, parents who fail to take good care of their children from an early age often have to endure the alienation of their children later in life. Specifically, it is mainly reflected in the following aspects:
Lack of parental care can easily lead to low self-esteem in children
Children need to be cared for and approved by their parents from an early age, which is essential to develop their self-confidence. If parents always treat their children coldly, rarely care about their children's school Xi life, and do not often express their love and approval, it is easy for children to have low self-esteem. He may mistakenly believe that he is not liked by his parents, and then he will lack confidence in himself, and it will be difficult for him to establish intimate relationships with others in the future.
Children who are insecure are more likely to develop mistrust
Similarly, parental indifference can deprive children of the opportunity to feel safe. When children are facing difficulties or pain, they need the care and support of their parents. Not only are indifferent parents unable to meet this need, but they also inadvertently make their children feel vulnerable and unsupported. This long-term insecurity can lead to a deep-seated distrust of people, making it difficult for children to be honest with others and build deep bonds.
Parents should correct their estranged approach
Therefore, parents should be aware that apathy is one of the important reasons for the estrangement between parents and children. As parents, it is necessary for us to adjust our parenting style and dedicate time to our children.
During this time, we should be attentive to the needs of the child and respond in a timely manner, often express my love for the child so that he can truly feel cared for and recognized, and give him support at the first time when he is facing difficulties, so that he can gain a sense of security. Only in this way will the child develop a strong bond with his or her parents and become an adult.
A family with excessively authoritarian parents
Families where parents are overly authoritarian can also often lead to the alienation of their children. The main problems for this type of parent are:
Parents manipulate their children's every move
Authoritarian parents are Xi to manipulating their children in all aspects, demanding that their children live strictly according to their own standards. They will stipulate what children should and should not do, what to play and what not to play, even if it is what to eat and what to wear, they must intervene in the arrangement, and they are extremely strict with the children's school Xi life.
Children lose the space to think and make choices for themselves
In this kind of family atmosphere, it is difficult for children to have the space to think and make decisions independently. Parents have already designed their future, and they just need to be able to answer their questions and carry out their parents' arrangements with confidence. Over time, they lose the ability to think and choose independently, and become marionettes in the hands of their parents.
Parents should establish a democratic and equal way of parenting
This harsh family environment can be overwhelming and depressing for children to break free from their parents' control and regain control of their own destiny. As a result, authoritarian parents often have a very hard time keeping their children's hearts. As parents, we should establish a democratic and equal parenting style, respect the independent personality of children, and let them gradually learn to make their own decisions and grow up in mistakes. In this way, they will appreciate their parents' care and understanding, and will be willing to get close to their parents and establish equal communication with them in the future.
Parents should be alert that their parenting style will directly affect their children's intimacy in the future. If you don't correct the wrong way in time, you will only suffer the pain of alienating your child later in life. Let's start now and adopt a more reasonable and harmonious parenting style, so as to win the child's lifelong closeness.