Recently, my memory has deteriorated, so I get up in the morning to go to work and finish freshening up. Change your shoes, grab your keys, strap on your backpack, and stand in the doorway, checking the note. lights, turned off; Gas, turned off; Wallets, documents, mobile phones, in the backpack; The key, in hand. Well, everything is in order. Close the door and make sure it is locked. Only then did I hum a song and walk to the elevator, and the cleaning aunt in the aisle smiled at me: "This girl is so diligent, she gets up so early on weekends when she doesn't go to work." ”
My mother told me that she took a fancy to an old fragrance sweater for 120 yuan, ready to wear it for the New Year, very beautiful, I didn't understand it when I heard it, so I transferred 200 directly to her. After a while, I went to her room to find her, and I heard her and my dad whispering: Our daughter's ability to draw inferences is not good, I told her sweaters, she only bought me sweaters, and she kept silent about my clothes and pants...
I had a friend who was a game streamer and he said he would take me fly. When I formed a team, there was still one person missing, and I saw a classmate who was doing micro-business online, so I invited her casually. As a result, when I was playing the game, she called my name: xxx, have you run out of breast enhancement cream? Remember to look for me when you're done. Later, a friend told me that more than 200,000 people were watching at that time, and the barrage was all concerned about my breasts
My friend Xiao Li just got married and opened a skin care store, and the business is very good. When I went to explore, a female customer in her forties asked Xiao Li, "How effective is this skincare product?" Xiao Li: "Oh, I'm not familiar with this one, please wait a minute, I'll ask my mother to help you introduce it." As he spoke, he pulled his wife over. The customer looked directly at his wife for ten minutes, and without asking anything, he took out his wallet: "Buy!"
Girls are like eggs, and when they first came into contact, they were a little cold and stiff! If you get in touch closely, you'll find that they're pure! On further contact, only yellow remains.
My sister-in-law bought a gold earring for my mother, and my mother's mouth couldn't close when she smiled, so she took her sister-in-law's hand and said, didn't you say that you were 20,000 yuan away from buying a car a few days ago, and your mother added it to you, so go buy it tomorrow. I also hurried over and took out 2,000 yuan from my bag, and told my mother, the bonus just issued, I'll buy you new clothes tomorrow, and my mother took it from me": What clothes to buy, you were hospitalized for appendicitis last month, and I still paid for the medicine for thousands of yuan, and when you pay me back the medicine, I'll pay me the rest next year. ”
When a female colleague said that she was going to Tibet, I smiled and said, "You can do without sunscreen, you must bring enough moisturizer!" Otherwise, it's not necessarily the skin that tans! The female colleague looked confused, and I added: "The people who drive to Tibet are all old drivers, don't go if you don't understand this!" ”
Lu Xun once said: A woman's two hobbies are about money with the poor, and feelings with the rich. The two major hobbies of men, the women of the Laliang family go into the water, and persuade the women of the wind and dust to be good.
A young woman on the bus was holding her 6-year-old son and taking a nap, and then the eldest aunt seemed to come, bleeding a lot, and the seat was bleeding a lot, and she found it when she was about to get off the bus, and she was probably embarrassed, and suddenly, she yelled: Baby, hold on! It's time to go to the hospital, hold on! Holding his son, he rushed out of the car.
There was a soldier who was arrested, and he had a very strange disease: on the first day he lost an arm, and he said to the warden: Please send my arm back home. The next day he lost a leg, and he said to the warden: Please send my leg back home. On the third day he lost another arm, and when he asked the warden again, the warden refused. He said: I now suspect that you are suspected of fleeing back to China in batches.