The first time I read Maupassant's short story "The Necklace", it was in a middle school textbook, and the teenager only experienced Mathilde's ultimate vanity of love.
When people reach middle age, they read "The Necklace" again, but in sighing and sighing, they discover the three truths of life.
In the face of the world of flowers, people will have a lot of desires, and only by learning to restrain and keep their desires within a moderate range can life balance them.
In life, we will meet all kinds of people, and what can be seen is not the same as being reliable, and human nature needs to be seen in things.
After walking through the hustle and bustle, you will understand that accepting your ordinariness is the best way to open up happiness and joy in life.
Only by restraining desires can we live in the moment
When I was a child, I heard an adult say, "If you always fantasize about something unrealistic, then what you have now is equal to nothing." ”
Mathilde, a girl from an extremely ordinary background, has an extremely outstanding appearance.
With the blessing of beauty, Mathilde felt that she was born to live a good life, and she became more and more eager for a luxurious life, and even became a little sickly.
She looks around her humble house, her worn chairs, and she fantasizes about the drapery waiting hall and the wide armchairs;
When she sees a woman doing housework at home, she fantasizes about being able to dominate a tall manservant;
Faced with a tablecloth that had been used for three days, she would fantasize about the glittering silver cutlery .......
Unrealistic fantasies make it impossible for Mathilde to live in the moment and immerse herself in pain every day.
In reality, many people are like this, their desires are too high, they are not boundary, but they don't know how to restrain themselves, which makes their lives worse.
Young people who have just joined the workforce, with a monthly salary of three or four thousand yuan, overdraft their consumption to buy luxury bags, and as a result, their financial situation has entered a vicious circle;
Knowing that their children's grades can only be admitted to ordinary undergraduates, their parents fantasize that their children can go to Peking University, but they become increasingly anxious;
has a five-figure monthly income, and when I see others living in luxury houses and driving luxury cars, I fantasize that I can live like that.
sighed that "the heart is higher than the sky, and the life is thinner than paper", emitting negative energy, and as a result, the air pressure at home is low, which is extremely depressing......
There is a good saying: "Desire is the key to achieving everything, but excessive desire can make people lose their reason and judgment." ”
People will have all kinds of desires, if they can't be restrained and let their desires expand infinitely, it will eventually lead people away from real life.
Only by restraining our desires and pursuing relatively practical goals can we not only live in the present, but also keep ourselves in a state of continuous progress.
Look at people in things, and see the truth in adversity
In this life, people will meet countless people, either for a short trip or for the rest of their lives.
When looking at a person, you can't look at the outside, but look at the things.
Mathilde's husband, seeing that she never went out, took great pains to get an invitation to the banquet and wanted to take her out to see and see.
But Mathilde didn't appreciate it, because she didn't have the nice clothes she could wear to the banquet.
When Mathilde said that she would pay four hundred francs for clothes, she agreed to give the money, despite the fact that her husband's face was white.
In fact, it was the husband's hard work to save it.
When the necklace was lost, the Mathildes were stunned.
But the husband did not complain, but chose to find a way to solve the problem.
Looking along the road, going to the police station, posting a reward, and looking for a horse-drawn carriage dealership, the husband's responsibility in facing the problem is commendable.
When they were convinced that the necklace could not be found, the husband took out the only assets and went out to borrow all kinds of money, and insisted on buying the necklace back and returning it.
Ten years of living in debt repayment is not easy for anyone, but the husband does not complain.
He worked during the day and copied at night, earning a meager income just to pay off his debts.
Such a person is kind, responsible, and responsible.
Such a person who is not rich and does not have a high social status gives Mathilde true love.
In fact, from this point of view, Mathilde is lucky, because she married the right person and saw the truth in the tribulation.
I once saw such a story:
A mother, alone with the baby, just turned around to put something at a glance did not look, the baby touched the water cup, the child was scalded by hot water, emergency medical treatment.
The husband, who rushed to the hospital, counted Bao's mother in public, without asking the cause and effect.
In fact, when the child is burned, the mother is distressed more than anyone else.
And her husband's inconsiderate and blind complaining is a thorn in the coffin of her mother.
In a calm and smooth life, we often can't see the most fundamental background of a person.
Kindness, responsibility, responsibility, tolerance...... These precious qualities are more evident when a person encounters things.
If you want to see a person clearly, then go through something with him.
Accept the ordinary, and you can find happiness more
There is a saying, "Self-acceptance is where all power begins." ”
Mathilde and her husband had to go into debt in order to return the necklace, and lived a hard life for ten years in order to pay off the debt.
At the moment when she was in debt and returned the necklace to her friend, Mathilde suddenly bravely accepted herself and all that reality had to be.
Instead of fantasizing, she rolled up her sleeves and got to work, washing greasy pottery, washing bed sheets with soap, washing clothes, taking out the garbage, carrying water, and haggling with various shopkeepers......
Once, she hated everything around her.
But when she began to accept and have the courage to face life, those disgusts disappeared.
On the contrary, she is genuinely happy that she can repay a few IOUs every month.
When she and her husband finally paid off their debts, Mathilde's beauty was gone.
She looked cold and vulgar, her hair and clothes were messed up casually, and she spoke loudly, completely devoid of her original appearance.
However, when she saw the still young and beautiful rich wife, she no longer avoided it because she hated the gap between the rich and the poor, but took the initiative to come forward to say hello.
She has changed, she has become calm and open-minded.
Only by accepting one's ordinariness and being down-to-earth can we create our own happiness in our ordinary life.
Friedrich Nietzsche once said, "To ordinary people, ordinary is happiness." ”
We are all ordinary people, we have to squeeze the subway to work, we have to get up early and be greedy to earn a few taels of silver, we have to take the baby with one hand and work with the other, but so what?
This is just the starting point, and it is precisely because the starting point is low that there is a goal in mind and a light in the eyes, so we must continue to work hard and move towards the distance step by step.
The vast majority of people in this world are ordinary people, and only by accepting the reality and working hard day after day in ordinary life can they discover their own value and achieve true happiness.
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I was fortunate to be middle-aged and revisited "The Necklace" in "Selected Short Stories of Maupassant", which changed my state of mind, gave me a different perception, and burst out of it.
For what you want, you have to see whether it can be reached through practical efforts, and if it is too unrealistic, you should put it on the shelf first, and go to those goals in a down-to-earth manner.
In relationships, we can't rely solely on feelings, nor can we look at what he says, but what he does when he encounters things.
People who are responsible, responsible, kind and upright can stand out in things.
No matter what kind of situation you encounter in life, accept it first, and then find a point of strength in reality, while perceiving ordinary happiness, while creating a better future.
Author | Shiman Wheat, strive to grow upward.